On the Wedding Night, I Transmigrated to After the Divorce – Chapter 88

Fragile and Sensitive

When did you learn to smoke?

【Where are you?】Fu Yunqing hurriedly messaged her.

            

Yu Yan replied quickly this time: 【On my way to see the sea~】

Fu Yunqing didn’t want such a vague answer: 【Going where?】

Yu Yan: 【I haven’t decided yet. Maybe just some port or beach.】

            

Yu Yan: 【What’s up? You haven’t wanted to come home and see me for the past two days, and now you want to keep me company?】

Was she blaming her?

Of course she was blaming her. She’d been avoiding coming home for two days, making it hard for her to sleep, and now she was really tired. Just now, while the car was refueling at a gas station, some monkeys from the nearby wildlife area had run out. Yu Yan had wanted to take a picture to send her as a postcard, but her phone got snatched. She had to go buy some small buns from the supermarket to trade for it back.

            

Fu Yunqing was anxious: 【I want to be with you.】

Fu Yunqing: 【Can you send me the address?】

Yu Yan finally stopped stringing her along: 【I’m about to catch a flight to Weicheng. I heard the snow there is really heavy in winter.】

            

Yu Yan started teasing her again: 【I’m in a bit of a rush, I might miss it. Gotta go for now~】

Yu Yan: 【But jiejie, don’t worry. I promised you I wouldn’t block you again, and I wouldn’t give you the silent treatment. I’ll let you know when I get there～】

Yu Yan: 【Blowing a kiss jpg.】

            

Fu Yunqing immediately called Assistant Liang to check the latest flights to Weicheng. The next flight was taking off in less than an hour. She was far from the airport and couldn’t make the normal departure time. Assistant Liang asked, “Should I have them extend the boarding time?”

Fu Yunqing hesitated for a long moment, then finally relented, shaking her head. “No…”

“Book the next one.”

            

She didn’t want to be so domineering. She didn’t want Yanyan to feel uncomfortable around her anymore.

She believed in her. She would wait for her.

“Thank you. Thank you for letting me know all of this…” Fu Yunqing packed up the things from the safe, put them all back, composed herself, and solemnly thanked Lu Yu. “Thank you for coming back to be with her back then. Thank you for taking care of her.”

            

“Like I said,” Lu Yu smiled. “I’m her best friend. It’s what I should do.”

Fu Yunqing took the safe with her. Lu Yu saw her to the door, watched her figure disappear into the stairwell, then turned back and closed the door, letting out a long breath.

Some things needed to be settled.

            

And the outcome didn’t have to be bad, after all.

Because the two of them really did love each other.

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Three hours later, Fu Yunqing boarded the flight to Weicheng.

            

Yu Yan had already arrived. Her long journey was just beginning. Fu Yunqing sat in her seat, carefully choosing her words for a long time, then sent a message: 【Did you land safely?】

From that moment on, she didn’t let herself get distracted. No matter how beautiful the clouds outside the window were, she only waited for her reply.

She stared at the screen, unconsciously counting the seconds in her mind. When she silently reached one minute and thirty seconds, Yu Yan sent her a picture of herself on the shuttle bus.

            

Yanyan: 【Landed safe and sound~】

Fu Yunqing felt relieved, as if her precarious state today had stabilized a little more.

But she wanted to know more: 【Where are you going to play?】

            

Yu Yan: 【Just wandering around for now. It’s so cold here~】

Weicheng was in the north, near the sea with strong winds, and the temperature was much lower than in Yuncheng. Fu Yunqing: 【Go to the airport mall and buy some thick clothes, okay?】

Yu Yan seemed very obedient: 【Okay~】

            

Fu Yunqing: 【Can you tell me where you are when I get off the plane?】

Yu Yan was incredibly well-behaved: 【Of course I’ll tell you~】

Fu Yunqing immediately checked the electronic screen. The plane had just leveled off into cruise. There was still over an hour of waiting time.

            

It felt so long, like the endless sky outside the window.

She missed her so much.

She wanted to see her so badly.

            

She regretted a little not being on the same flight as Yu Yan. She started overthinking again, thinking about Yu Yan’s illness, recalling the scenes from back then.

Why did Yanyan get that kind of illness? When did her strangeness begin?

Fu Yunqing thought back carefully—it was after the cooperation crisis between the Yu Corporation and the Fu Corporation.

            

That cooperation had fallen apart because Yu Lan had burned the bridge after crossing it, costing the Fu Corporation over a billion in funds. Grandmother was so angry she was hospitalized. It was around then that Yu Yan started acting panicked and guilty, apologizing to her over and over.

Had it started from then?

She had been so busy during that time. She had to stay with Grandmother in the hospital, and the corporation was full of thorny issues. Even though she had told Yu Yan many times, “This has nothing to do with you. No one blames you,” she had still taken it to heart, hadn’t she?

            

Fu Yunqing was anxious to send a message asking if that was the case, but she felt it was inappropriate. She was out having fun now. Would bringing this up so urgently affect her mood? They would see each other soon. Meeting face-to-face was clearer than talking over the phone. She believed that Yanyan would tell her everything.

So Fu Yunqing only planned to ask her ordinary questions, like whether she had bought thick clothes or eaten. Unexpectedly, Yu Yan’s message came first.

【You haven’t eaten all day, have you? Did they serve a meal on the plane?】

            

Fu Yunqing was so happy that she had taken the initiative to message her. She replied: 【They’ll serve a meal later.】

Yu Yan: 【Then you have to eat a lot. It makes my heart ache.】

“…” Fu Yunqing gently pressed her lips together.

            

For the first time, she truly felt that the person she was facing now was the Yu Yan who had recovered her memories, who had been separated from her for over a year.

She had a complete blank in her understanding of her life for an entire year. She had missed all the pain and growth of that year.

Fu Yunqing found it strange, and also a little unfamiliar. The person on the other end gave her a very different feeling from the Yanyan of three years ago. There was a contradiction—she seemed more mature, and also more mischievous.

            

Her tone was so cheerful, but was she really happy?

Two hours later, Fu Yunqing walked out of Weicheng Airport. It was already four in the afternoon. The weather in Weicheng was beautiful. There was no snow, just a rare sunny day. But the sun was already setting. A faint touch of orange floated at the edge of the deep blue sky, like diluted paint. Fu Yunqing anxiously asked Yu Yan where she was. The other party sent her a location as promised. The pin showed her at a beach by the sea. She was still over fifty kilometers away.

Fifty kilometers. Fu Yunqing had no heart to admire the scenery of a foreign land. Her only thought was to see her. It was an agonizing process, getting closer and closer to her longing.

            

The car couldn’t drive onto the sand, so it had to stop by the roadside.

Fu Yunqing pushed open the door and stepped out. A bone-chilling sea breeze hit her face. The sky had already darkened to a deep, somber blue. Looking ahead, the boundary between sky and sea was a sunset afterglow like molten amber. Above it, smoky pink and pale purple blended together, with lazy clouds drifting through. Fu Yunqing saw from a distance a figure in a coat with long hair crouching at the end of the pier under a streetlamp. The hem of the coat and the long hair were both whipping violently in the wind.

Fu Yunqing recognized her as Yu Yan at a glance—or maybe it wasn’t recognition, but a powerful surge of intuition. Her heart trembled. Afraid she might do something foolish, she quickened her pace into a jog. “Yanyan!”

            

She stopped two meters behind her. The person was clearly startled, turning her face around, a wisp of smoke drifting from her mouth, hazy between them, then immediately blown away by the sea breeze.

Yu Yan’s eyes widened slightly as she stood up. The sound of the waves was too loud; she hadn’t heard Fu Yunqing’s footsteps.

Yu Yan’s hand hung down, a thin cigarette, half-smoked, pinched between two fingers beside the wind-tossed hem of her coat. She stood there between the sea and the sky, exuding a lonely, dejected air that she should never have had. Fu Yunqing was stunned, looking at her with sorrow. “Yanyan…”

            

Yu Yan knew what she was sad about. She generously raised a smile, like greeting an old friend, familiarly saying, “How did you get here so fast? I thought you’d still be another ten minutes or so.”

Fu Yunqing’s brow furrowed with heartache. She asked her, “When did you learn to smoke?”

Ah, she hadn’t wanted Fu Yunqing to see. Who knew she would come so quickly?

            

Fu-jiejie really wanted to see her as soon as possible.

“Hmm… I don’t remember. During that really hard time?” Yu Yan turned around, her arms resting on the railing. She stubbed out the cigarette and tucked it into the pack, then put it in her coat pocket.

Fu Yunqing stepped closer, standing beside her, looking at her profile. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

            

Yu Yan’s lips curled again. She let out a sorrowful sigh. “I didn’t want to.”

Some things couldn’t be said just because you wanted to say them. Otherwise, why would there be so many complications in the world? The human heart was just that complex, fragile, sensitive, and changeable.

Yu Yan was just that disappointing. She had known for a long time that she was actually very fragile. In fact, she was even more fragile than she had thought.

            

Fu Yunqing said anxiously, “Do you know how much my heart aches?”

“I know. Of course I know. I’ve been thinking all day today about how much it would hurt you when you found out I was sick.” Of course, she didn’t need to think about it. Fu-jiejie would definitely be very sad, very regretful, very guilty.

But making her sad wasn’t Yu Yan’s intention. Yu Yan wasn’t being smug either. She felt heartache too. She was thinking, how many times had Fu-jiejie’s heart been broken for her? How many tears had she shed because she loved her?

            

During that time apart, Fu-jiejie must not have felt any better than she did.

“And now? Can you tell me?” Fu Yunqing asked with a plea. “Why did you become unhappy? Why did you get sick? Was it because of Yu Lan? Did you want a divorce because I was neglecting your feelings, right?”

“No, it was all my fault. Please don’t blame yourself.” Yu Yan turned to look at her. Her eyes were curved, but Fu Yunqing couldn’t feel any lightness or happiness in them.

            

She said, “I was just too fragile.”

Yu Yan lowered her eyes, her voice dropping a little. “At the time… I really let you down. I let your family down.”

“This isn’t your problem. It has nothing to do with you.”

            

“Pfft.”

Yu Yan let out a soft laugh, then looked up at her eyes, which were filled with watery light yet firm and resolute, desperately trying to tell her something.

“Jiejie, you’ve already said that so many times before.”

            

It was just that she hadn’t been able to take it to heart back then.

She sighed again. “So I said I’m very fragile.”

The two of them stood in silent confrontation for a moment. Fu Yunqing had too much to say and didn’t know how to start. Yu Yan turned around again, her smile fading. She looked down at the churning seawater beneath her feet and suddenly said, “You know what?”

            

She said it very calmly, faintly, without a hint of a sob. “I’m actually not Yu Lan’s biological daughter.”

Fu Yunqing: “…What?”

“I was a child my maternal grandmother picked up.” Yu Yan smiled again, as if reminiscing about her grandmother. “That’s why I lived with my maternal grandmother until I was ten. She didn’t want to take me in because I had no real connection to her.”

            

“It was because my maternal grandmother knew I always wanted a mother, and her health was starting to fail. She was afraid she couldn’t take care of me anymore, so she begged her daughter to take me away.”

How could that be? Fu Yunqing had never known…

Of course she wouldn’t know. Yu Yan herself had only found out from Yu Lan’s own mouth a little over a year ago.

            

It was strange, really. For someone who was usually so carefree… She must have cared too much. The more you care, the more sensitive you become.

She loved Fu Yunqing deeply, and she cared deeply about Fu Yunqing’s family. But she was too young, too immature, with no ability to handle pressure. Whenever she encountered a problem she couldn’t solve, she wanted to run away.

At the time, Yu Lan had screwed the Fu Corporation over badly. Grandmother Fu was so angry she was hospitalized. Yu Yan was truly terrified. She had this feeling that as Yu Lan’s daughter, she was guilty by association. She worried that Grandmother Fu would hate her, that the Fu family would hate her, that Fu Yunqing would be caught in the middle and have a hard time, and that Fu Yunqing would also resent her in her heart—Fu Yunqing loved her own grandmother so much. She had been so anxious back then, staying in the hospital for days without coming home.

            

“I don’t know if you remember, but at the time, I wanted to go to the hospital with you to see Grandmother. Aunt told me not to go first, that it would be fine if Yunqing went alone.”

Fu Yunqing recalled that incident and understood how those words had hurt Yu Yan. “I remember… I was…”

“Aunt was afraid that Grandmother would be unhappy to see me,” Yu Yan interrupted her. “Did you have that same worry in your heart back then?”

            

Fu Yunqing hesitated, took a deep breath, and pressed her lips together. She didn’t want to lie.

“I’m sorry… I didn’t think you would care so much. I was very anxious at the time. I was really afraid that Grandmother would be unhappy to see you, and even more afraid that you would be upset.”

“I know. You don’t need to apologize. I’m not telling you this to make you apologize. I just want to say that I was too sensitive.”

            

A time of too much sensitivity, a topic too sensitive. Maybe neither of them meant any blame. Only Yu Yan was trapped in a state of low self-esteem, feeling like she owed everyone, lost in her own thoughts.

Had Fu Yunqing ever resented her in her heart?

Even if she had, Fu Yunqing still loved her. Yu Yan knew that clearly. But she couldn’t get past it herself. That feeling in her heart couldn’t be erased. Even though Fu Yunqing had told her many times that it wasn’t her fault, she still couldn’t stop thinking about it.

            

She didn’t dare to listen to Fu Yunqing’s phone calls with the Fu family. Every day, they were frantically dealing with the various losses and problems Yu Lan had caused them, overwhelmed. She was afraid of hearing their ridicule and dissatisfaction with her, and also afraid of hearing that the Fu Corporation’s situation was getting worse.

Yu Yan’s sense of guilt grew deeper and deeper, and her urge to escape grew stronger. She began to feel that she couldn’t stay in that environment anymore. She thought too much every day, living in constant fear.

Of course, she didn’t have the courage to vent these feelings to Fu Yunqing. “So I went to confront Yu Lan. I asked her why she did it. I demanded to know if she even cared about me as a daughter. We had a huge fight, and she blurted it out.”

            

Yu Yan remembered every word she had blurted out. They had been arguing so fiercely. Yu Lan knew she was in the wrong, but she refused to back down, so she lashed out in anger. “Do you really think I could give birth to a disappointing daughter like you?”

“I never wanted you in the first place. That old woman forced you on me! She picked you up from the roadside!”

After she said it, they both froze. Yu Lan tried to cover it up, pretending it was just a heated remark, brushing it off and refusing to mention it again. But Yu Yan had truly taken it to heart.

            

“I secretly went for a DNA test. And it turned out to be true. She’s not my biological mother. No wonder I don’t look like her at all.”

“You know what? At the time…” Yu Yan paused, her brow furrowing, but she still used a light tone. “I was pretty devastated.”

For the past twenty-something years, even though Yu Yan had complained countless times about how terrible Yu Lan was, she had never truly doubted that she wasn’t Yu Lan’s biological daughter.

            

The reason she could be so happy, the reason she could so comfortably enjoy the luxurious life Yu Lan provided, the reason she could ask Yu Lan for money every day and still go against her, was because she felt secure and unafraid.

She knew she was Yu Lan’s biological child. She knew that no matter what, Yu Lan was still her mother. A child is born and should be raised. Spending her mother’s money was only natural. She had lived the life of a young miss for so many years without ever worrying about the future.

So when she learned the truth, she really felt like her world had collapsed. That solid sense of security that came from blood ties had crumbled. She felt like she was all alone in this world, with no one she could be close to or rely on without restraint.

            

Not even Fu Yunqing.

She unilaterally felt a rift between herself and the Fu family, even Fu Yunqing. She unilaterally felt that Yu Lan didn’t want her as a daughter, that there was no place for her anywhere.

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The author has something to say:

            

Almost five thousand words, and I still haven’t finished this plot. But I really don’t have any more energy. See you tomorrow~

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