On the Wedding Night, I Transmigrated to After the Divorce – Chapter 52

Too Many Broken Promises

“Fu Yunqing, I don’t remember…”

After sending it, Yu Yan tossed her phone aside and covered her face, waiting. About three minutes later, she sat up to check, but Fu Yunqing hadn’t replied.

            

Half an hour later.

Fu Yunqing still hadn’t replied.

She really loved leaving people on read. Scrolling up, how many of her own messages had been left on read by her?

            

Granted, Yu Yan enjoyed the feeling of being fished and toyed with by a beautiful woman, acting like her dog, but she had to look at the circumstances, okay?

She had clearly shown weakness to her, and was even letting herself be imprisoned, humbly wishing only for her to come back and see her. Even if she was being kept, the gold master¹ still had to come back and check on her pet.

Fuming, Yu Yan wanted to leave again, but that female driver named Dan Lin claimed she also served as her bodyguard, declaring that no matter where Miss Yu went, she had to follow and protect her. She was relentlessly clingy, completely impossible to shake off.

            

Failing to make it out, Yu Yan returned inside and sent a message to Lu Yu, accepting her fate: 【I’m not coming back tonight】

Lu Yu: 【What’s going on with you two?】

Yu Yan: 【She sent a bodyguard to watch me, restricting my movement】

            

Lu Yu: 【Forced love², huh?】

Yu Yan: 【What do you mean, forced love? She won’t even come home or reply to my messages. Where’s the love in that?】

Lu Yu: 【Should I come get you? Find a way to break you out?】

            

Yu Yan thought it over: 【Forget it】

Lu Yu: 【Why forget it?】

Yu Yan: 【I just feel like if I really leave, she’ll be very sad】

            

Lu Yu: 【…】

Lu Yu: 【Respect and blessings】

“…”

            

The massive villa was lonely and boring—no cat, no angry jiejie. Bored to death, Yu Yan took a shower and lay on the tatami in front of the first-floor French windows to play on her phone.

The heating in the villa was excellent; even in the dead of winter, walking barefoot in thin pajamas was incredibly comfortable. Although her plan of being kept by Teacher An had been intercepted³ and failed, she was still ultimately lounging in a massive villa, imprisoned by a super-rich lady. Yu Yan no longer needed to manage her money-making Douyin account; she began browsing expensive luxury goods—bags, diamonds, necklaces—to see which ones she wanted, so that once she coaxed her jiejie into a good mood, she could have her buy them all.

Hmph, hmph.

            

Hahaha.

She spent the entire day playing on her phone until her eyes ached. Putting the device down, she stared out at the pitch-black garden. Night had already fallen, yet Fu Yunqing still hadn’t returned. After spacing out for a while, Yu Yan drifted off to sleep on the tatami.

With things on her mind, her sleep was fitful. When her consciousness returned, it was pitch black before her eyes. Yu Yan propped herself up, only to find a blanket over her.

            

“Mmh…” She rubbed her eyes. Her brain hadn’t fully booted up, and she felt a little uneasy in the unfamiliar environment. Hearing the sound of the door opening, she looked back to see a woman’s figure walking in, tall and slender. Recognizing her as Fu Yunqing, she sobered up a bit, sat up, and gazed at her expectantly.

The woman stopped by the door, and Yu Yan didn’t make a sound.

The two remained in a brief standoff. Fu Yunqing walked in, turning to close the door. The butler went up to ask if she needed dinner; Yu Yan couldn’t hear what she replied, only seeing the butler nod. Bypassing Yu Yan, who was still gazing at her expectantly, she headed upstairs.

            

Yu Yan propped herself up on the tatami, watching her ascend to the second floor.

She was back…

But she still seemed to be angry.

            

Yu Yan got up. As the butler went to the kitchen to order a bowl of noodles, Yu Yan followed her in and asked, “What’s wrong with Fu Yunqing?”

The butler said, “Miss Fu said she’s a bit tired and asked the kitchen to just make a bowl of noodles to send up. Don’t worry, she might just still be angry.”

“Did she just finish work?”

            

The butler said, “It looks that way. She seems truly exhausted and haggard. She looked after you all of last night, and left early again this morning. Counting it up, she hasn’t closed her eyes in nearly two days.”

“…”

Oh, heavens. What should she do?

            

Yu Yan thought about it, then looked toward the second floor. There was nothing for it…

“Once the noodles are ready, give them to me to take up.”

---

Carrying the steaming bowl of noodles made by the chef, Yu Yan followed the butler’s directions to find the room Fu Yunqing was in. Standing before the door, she mentally prepared herself, curled her fingers, and knocked twice.

            

After a long moment, the woman’s weary voice came through the door, “Come in.”

Yu Yan pressed the handle and pushed the door open. No lights were on in the room. She could faintly make out Fu Yunqing sitting in a chair, but the light was too dim to read her expression, and she couldn’t tell if she was watching her.

Yu Yan turned to find the light switch.

            

The moment the light turned on, it was a little harsh. Yu Yan saw her close her eyes and knit her brows. This seemed to be a study; Fu Yunqing hadn’t even taken off her coat, sitting limply in the chair. After a short while, she opened her eyes.

From the moment Yu Yan knocked, Fu Yunqing knew it was her.

Fu Yunqing’s gaze was deep, sad and exhausted. Being looked at like this, Yu Yan’s mood also grew downcast.

            

Not knowing what to say, Yu Yan walked up to her, placed the noodles on the desk in front of her, and murmured hesitantly, “Your noodles.”

Fu Yunqing didn’t speak or pick up her chopsticks. She simply looked up at her, remaining unresponsive for a long time.

Time seemed to freeze. Yu Yan’s heart skipped a beat under her gaze. She curled her fingertips and asked tentatively, “Aren’t you going to eat?”

            

“The noodles won’t taste good if they sit too long…”

Was this really a question of whether the noodles tasted good?

“Housekeeper Auntie said you didn’t sleep a wink last night because you were looking after me,” Yu Yan apologized. “I’m sorry, I drank too much last night and probably babbled a lot of nonsense. Don’t take it to heart, it was all just crazy talk.”

            

Yu Yan’s attitude was sincere and heartfelt. Ever since she woke up, she had been kicking herself over how she had cursed Fu Yunqing as a bad person in the car, threatened to call the police, and made a scene with her the entire way. She could absolutely never drink again; throwing a drunken tantrum was truly awful.

But Fu Yunqing made no response to her apology, so exhausted she seemed almost deathly still, carrying an air of deep sorrow.

What was that supposed to mean?

            

Did she hate replying to messages and hate talking in person too?

She really was a mute.

After a round of grumbling in her head, Yu Yan actually felt even more awkward. She changed the subject, “Where did you go today? Why didn’t you reply to my messages?”

            

Yu Yan pouted, saying aggrievedly, “I’ve been waiting for you all day today, and you ignore me now that you’re back. Do you not even want to eat the noodles I brought you?”

Did she want her back? Didn’t she hate her, didn’t she resent her? Fu Yunqing had thought she wouldn’t want to see her.

She was trying to please her now, quite obviously. But who was she trying to please? Her lover? Or a gold master she believed she had?

            

Fu Yunqing’s gaze grew increasingly gloomy. Yu Yan had no idea what lay behind her silence. She was already being so good and considerate—was she still not satisfied? She had suffered plenty of grievances from her without even settling scores, choosing instead to filter out her own emotions to coax her, yet she was still pressing a warm face against a cold backside⁴.

“Can you please not ignore me? You’re always like this—always getting so cold out of nowhere. I don’t even know what’s wrong with you.”

Yu Yan was starting to feel genuinely aggrieved.

            

“Yu Yan…” Fu Yunqing said with some pain, “Are you like this with everyone?”

Yu Yan froze. “…What?”

“Would anyone do?”

            

Fu Yunqing took a deep breath, completely ignoring the bowl of noodles, and said to her, “If the person standing in front of you right now weren’t me, if the person who took you away last night weren’t me, but An Qiu, Li Tong, or just any woman, you would accept the situation just like this, send her dinner, and say these things to please her, wouldn’t you?”

“You can be like this with anyone, can’t you?”

“Yu Yan, what on earth do you take me for?” Her overflowing emotions made her somewhat unable to control herself. Fu Yunqing stood up, her upward gaze turning downward, but there was no pressure in her eyes—only trembling waves. “What on earth do you take me for? Do you love me? Have you ever loved me? Do you care about me?”

            

Never expecting her to say these things, Yu Yan widened her eyes in helplessness.

“I really, really don’t know what to do,” Fu Yunqing’s breath also began to tremble. She said with force, “Yu Yan, I admit I miss you. I really miss you.”

“Do you know? I’ve missed you every single day since you left, and every day you’ve been gone has been painful. Going a night without sleep is just a daily routine; I’ve already had insomnia for a whole year. There hasn’t been a single moment where I could be calm and peaceful. When you came back to find me, I was actually very happy, very relieved. Do you know that?”

            

“That day I ran into you at the bar with Ran Ling, and you asked to add me back on WeChat. I didn’t agree. After you left, I didn’t sleep the entire night, keeping my eyes open until dawn. I regretted not giving you my WeChat. I was afraid you wouldn’t come to find me again. What was I supposed to do?”

“You really didn’t seem to care that much; you truly didn’t try to find me again. Two days later, you could go out drinking with others, and when you saw me, you turned a blind eye, as if you didn’t know me, treating me like a stranger. I was very hurt, very panicked. Do you know?”

“Is this what you wanted to achieve?”

            

“You always follow your own whims—one moment cold to me, the next becoming warm, as if trying to win me back. I don’t know what you’re thinking, but I still secretly felt glad. I thought, if Yanyan really wants to return to my side, really wants to continue being with me properly, and really knows she was wrong… I can let bygones be bygones for everything in the past. I only need you by my side. Because I love you and don’t want to lose you. A year has already been long enough.”

“But I can’t accept you turning back to find me while at the same time with other people—” She broke off.

I cannot accept you turning back to find me while also keeping in close contact with others. I cannot accept you allowing others to do intimate things to you, or you saying those ambiguous, coquettish words to others that you used to say to me. I cannot accept how, the moment I ignore you, you can turn around and throw yourself into someone else’s arms without any burden, nor can I accept that you might leave with someone else at any moment just like you did a year ago, abandoning me, abandoning our home.

            

You promised you would always stay by my side, but you didn’t. You said you would never block Fu-jiejie, but you still broke your word twice. You have reneged on too many promises, do you know that?

What exactly are you thinking?

What exactly are you trying to do?

            

Do you still love me at all, and do you really want to return to my side?

Fu Yunqing had been thinking all night and all day: if she had arrived a little later last night, if she hadn’t appeared at all, would Yu Yan really have gone home with someone else to be kept by them? To their relationship, this would undoubtedly be another most fatal trampling. She would have lightly pushed Fu Yunqing into the abyss once again, without caring, without minding, without feeling any heartache at all.

Fu Yunqing regarded her as precious as her own child, unable to bear hurting her in the slightest, but how much weight did she actually carry in Yu Yan’s eyes? What did she ultimately count as?

            

She was truly hurt. Whether in the past or the present, she had been deeply, deeply hurt.

Fu Yunqing’s heart felt as though it were being twisted by a knife as she raised her voice to demand sharply, “Yu Yan, what exactly am I in your heart?” If one listened closely, her final words were already choked with a sob.

Yu Yan stared at her blankly, entirely unaware that her own fingertips were trembling.

            

“Fu Yunqing…”

She murmured helplessly, her eyes turning red. “Fu Yunqing… I—I don’t remember.”

---