On the Wedding Night, I Transmigrated to After the Divorce – Chapter 78

Resistance

Feeling Suffocated

Yu Yan hadn’t expected Fu Yunqing to react so strongly.

            

She also stood up in a hurry, but she didn’t know how to explain—did wanting her back sooner really mean she only wanted to talk about that sort of thing?

Of course not. Yu Yan had wanted her back simply because she missed her and wanted to see her sooner. Since she had been keeping this matter bottled up inside, the words had naturally slipped out the moment they met. How could Fu Yunqing think that way? Why did she react as if Yu Yan were cheatingcheating¹ on her and running off with An Qiu?

As expected, she still minded An Qiu immensely.

            

She minded her deeply, deeply.

But Yu Yan felt genuinely wronged. She no longer had those kinds of feelings for An Qiu; she simply wanted to accept her invitation to act in a film she was directing. That was all.

She hadn’t kept it a secret from her either. Wasn’t she trying to discuss it with her properly?

            

“I didn’t… I just…” Yu Yan forced herself to stay calm and organized her thoughts. “When I said I love you and wanted you to come back soon, it had nothing to do with this. I wanted you back quickly because I simply wanted to see you. It’s just that I happened to have this matter to discuss as well. Since I had this on my mind, I had to tell you, didn’t I?”

Yu Yan rarely showed panic in front of Fu Yunqing, as her jiejie was always the gentlest with her. Fu Yunqing realized she had lost her composure, but she was in no state of mind to care. Taking a deep breath, she asked, “Why do you want to act?”

Her tone remained a cold interrogation, making Yu Yan highly uncomfortable, a lump of aggrieved frustration lodging itself in her throat.

            

This was a far cry from the scenario she had envisioned. She had thought Fu Yunqing would be gentle, respect her enough to listen, and even laughingly support her after hearing her dream of becoming a Film EmperorFilm Emperor².

But it wasn’t the case at all…

Dejected, Yu Yan said, “I just feel like I’m staying at home all day with nothing to do. I get so bored when you’re not around. You have to work and can’t go out and play with me every day. Acting seemed quite appealing, and I was interested, so I thought about giving it a try. Can’t I?”

            

“If you were bored, why didn’t you tell me? Don’t you know? I can give you whatever you want.” Fu Yunqing looked at her and said, “The Fu Corporation has a footprint in the entertainment industry. If you are interested in acting, I can have any script you want brought directly to you. You don’t need to look to anyone else.”

“I…” Yu Yan knitted her brows.

She wasn’t actually that interested anyway, and she hadn’t gone looking for anyone else, okay? Director An had just happened to offer, and she had just happened to find it suitable. Since everything lined up, they could just discuss it. Why did Fu Yunqing have to make it sound so incredibly grave?

            

It wasn’t as if she were absolutely set on doing it.

For a moment, Yu Yan didn’t know how to explain. Fu Yunqing, however, mistook her silence for reluctance. Her heart sank further and further as she asked with great difficulty, “You don’t want me to help you, do you?”

“Of course not!” Yu Yan said in a hurry.

            

“Why wouldn’t I want you to help me? How could you think that?” Seeing her expression grow even worse and the misunderstanding spiral out of control, Yu Yan took a few steps forward, desperately trying to explain. “Of course I’m glad to have your help! How could you think I’m trying to draw a line between us? Haven’t I been relying on you all this time? I’ve been spending your money this entire time without a single shred of guilt.”

“It’s just that Director An happened to reach out to me, and I happened to find it suitable. There really is nothing else to it. If it makes you unhappy, then I’ll just turn her down. I’ll reject her, okay? Jiejie, don’t be angry. Please don’t be angry, okay?”

Yu Yan was truly at her wits’ end. This was her first relationship, and experiencing a conflict like this made her terrified that the tension would keep escalating.

            

She hated arguing with those close to her; she knew they would only end up hurting each other.

Meeting Yu Yan’s anxious, pleading gaze and seeing her so frantic that she looked almost helpless… Fu Yunqing took a deep breath, forcing herself to calm down. Pressing down on the bitter, unpalatable feelings clawing at her throat, she reached out on the verge of a breakdown, taking hold of Yu Yan’s wrist, and pulled her into her arms.

Held tightly in Fu Yunqing’s embrace, Yu Yan rested her chin on her shoulder. She could clearly feel her rapid, pounding heartbeat and her trembling breaths. Everything about this screamed that something was wrong, leaving Yu Yan utterly at a loss.

            

She really hadn’t expected things to turn out this way. She had never imagined Fu Yunqing would be this resistant—it was much more severe than she had initially anticipated.

“Reject her…” The woman holding her so tightly buried her face in the crook of her neck, her voice thick with suppressed emotion. “Don’t have any contact with her ever again, alright?”

…Not even staying in touch?

            

There hadn’t been any deliberate contact between them to begin with, and getting back in touch had been purely about business. Did she have to sever even that relationship? Or had Fu Yunqing misunderstood something again?

There really was absolutely nothing between her and An Qiu anymore.

Yu Yan felt it was unreasonable. Her first instinct was to struggle, to argue her point, but then she remembered how agitated Fu Yunqing had been moments ago. She swallowed her words, only letting out a soft, “Mm, I understand…”

            

She capitulated, “I won’t act in her film, and I won’t have any contact with her anymore. Please don’t be angry, okay?”

Having secured Yu Yan’s promise and holding her close, feeling her resting completely still in her arms, the surging tide of pain in Fu Yunqing’s chest finally began to recede. “I’m sorry. I was too anxious just now…”

You really were too anxious. I just wanted to have a proper discussion with you…

            

Yu Yan didn’t dare explain this to her, fearing she would think she was still trying to persist. Wanting to turn the page on this matter as quickly as possible, she murmured, “It’s fine…”

They hugged like that in front of the living room sofa for nearly ten minutes before Fu Yunqing finally let her go.

Leaving their embrace, Yu Yan was weighed down by her thoughts. An unspeakable rift spread in their hearts—a feeling of helplessness so clear that neither of them dared to delve any deeper.

            

Fu Yunqing utterly loathed this feeling. It made her feel as though Yu Yan were miles away. Unable to bear it, she felt a desperate urge to make amends. She reached out, cupping Yu Yan’s cheek and gently smoothing her stray hairs, as if this display of absolute tenderness could erase all of the unpleasantness from moments ago and draw Yu Yan right back to her side.

Yu Yan looked at her, her lips pressed tightly together, her brow still slightly knitted.

“What kind of role do you want to play? I’ll contact Assistant Liang in a moment and have her ask around to see if there are any scripts suitable for you lately.” Fu Yunqing said, “If you want to find something to do, jiejie will of course support you. I’m glad to see it. But the entertainment industry is not a simple place; you can’t be too trusting of others. I can help you plan, pave the way, and protect you. Do you understand?”

            

Yu Yan knew that, of course. Fu Yunqing was incredibly capable, wealthy, and powerful. Under her protection, any under-the-table transactions, deliberate sabotage, disrespect, or neglect that newcomers typically faced would never happen to her.

But Yu Yan suddenly lost all interest—she no longer had any interest in acting at all, and she didn’t even know why.

It was as if Fu Yunqing’s intervention had stained everything with a sense of deliberateness, running completely counter to Yu Yan’s original intention.

            

She had completely lost the mood. Shaking her head, she said, “No need, really. I don’t actually want to…” She didn’t actually want to enter the entertainment industry, so there was no need for her to go to all that trouble.

She had originally just wanted to play around. All that talk about paving the way and whatnot sounded pretty pressuring.

Hearing this, Fu Yunqing fell silent as well.

            

An unspeakable, unfamiliar atmosphere lingered between them. Fu Yunqing looked at her lowered eyes. Her lips twitched slightly, but she swallowed the words on the tip of her tongue.

Why didn’t she want to anymore?

“It’s all right…” Fu Yunqing said. “You can take your time to think about it.”

            

“Whether you want to act, paint, or do anything else, I will support you. I will stand by you through whatever you wish to do. But the condition is that you must tell me and let me know, so we can plan and discuss it together. Don’t go trusting others blindly.” No matter what Yu Yan decided or thought, Fu Yunqing always wanted to be the first to know. She craved Yu Yan’s exuberant urge to share, wanting her to talk about every little detail, every passing thought in her mind.

Why didn’t she?

Why didn’t she do that?

            

If she really was just acting on a passing whim, why had she spent two days turning it over in her mind? What had she been thinking about all this time? If she truly relied on her enough, why hadn’t she told her the very instant she received An Qiu’s message?

Why was she plotting to escape? Did she still plan on leaving? When would she go? She was going to see Lu Yu—had she already found a place to live?

Fu Yunqing’s pain didn’t ease; it felt as thick as a swamp in the depths of her heart.

            

She didn’t know what to do, and could only plead with Yu Yan, “I am your family. I will be by your side forever. You can always rely on me completely, and I will handle whatever comes your way. Yanyan, do you understand?”

Yu Yan looked at her, her eyes complex and hesitant.

She murmured, “Mm…”

            

Right then and there, right in front of Fu Yunqing, Yu Yan sent the rejection message to An Qiu.

Since several days had passed, and Yu Yan’s apology and refusal were sincere enough to look like the result of careful deliberation, An Qiu didn’t press further, choosing to respect her choice.

The unexpected confrontation dissolved just like that. By the time Auntie Zhang arrived to prepare dinner, both of them had returned to a state of calm.

            

A movie played on the television as background noise. Auntie Zhang’s cooking was delicious as always, and Fu Yunqing kept placing food onto her plate. Driven by a bizarre desire to make everything seem normal, Yu Yan forced herself to eat a large bowl of rice despite having absolutely no appetite.

And after finishing her meal, she wanted to immediately escape this space that left her both stuffed and suppressed. Instead of waiting sweetly for Fu Yunqing to finish eating slowly like she usually did, she used the excuse of playing with the cat to run up to the second floor.

Once she disappeared from Fu Yunqing’s line of sight, her mind and body, which had been wound tight for a long time, finally relaxed.

            

But later that night, she suffered from insomnia.

She opened her eyes to pitch-black darkness. After her eyes adjusted for a moment, she could make out Fu Yunqing’s shoulder exposed outside the blanket. The two of them were sleeping close together, just like usual.

Before sleeping, they had kissed for a while, but they didn’t go any further due to a reason they both knew but neither voiced—they were simply not in the mood.

            

“I am your family. I will be by your side forever. You can always rely on me completely, and I will handle whatever comes your way. Yanyan, do you understand?”

These words kept running through Yu Yan’s mind.

Such deep love, such a strong sense of security. Yu Yan obviously should have been incredibly moved, shouldn’t she? She was the one who starved for love the most.

            

Why was it that, the very instant she heard them, a suffocating sense of resistance surged from the depths of her heart?

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