On the Wedding Night, I Transmigrated to After the Divorce – Chapter 54
by Little PandaThe Diagnostic Results
Wanting Her Memories to Never Return
Fu Yunqing caught her, adjusting her posture to bring their bodies tightly together. Yu Yan rested her head on her shoulder; jiejie’s body was so soft and fragrant. With jiejie’s arm still wrapped around her waist, Yu Yan comfortably curled up, burying her face in the crook of her neck.
Fu Yunqing’s movement as she pulled her into her arms was natural and gentle, as if she knew her intimately and was deeply familiar with her embrace. Yu Yan thought, We must have often hugged like this in the past.
It must have been me who always clung to her, begging for hugs.
Fu Yunqing looked down at her, unable to resist checking the wound on her temple once more. Though she clearly felt a pang of heartache, she inspected it with meticulous care, tracing the mark with her fingertips. She repeated the motion over and over, reluctant to pull away, as if she wanted to smooth out the wound.
Yu Yan gazed up at her obediently, quietly soaking in the sensation.
“Do you only remember things from before we got married?” Fu Yunqing asked softly.
“Mhm… On the day the wedding ended, we went back to the estate together. I fainted, and when I woke up, I was in the hospital here.”
Yu Yan had indeed fainted that day. Fu Yunqing had been removing her makeup when she heard the sound of her falling and rushed out to check. Finding Yu Yan unconscious on the floor, she had immediately called the doctor and tried to wake her. Fortunately, it was only due to post-illness weakness combined with extreme fatigue—the wedding that day had indeed been exhausting. But why did her memory stop right there?
“Did you feel any headaches or dizziness after you woke up?”
Yu Yan shook her head. “Just a little bit during the first few days after I was discharged. Now, I don’t feel anything at all.”
“I’ve booked an appointment with a doctor. Tomorrow, we’ll get you a thorough, detailed checkup.”
“…Okay.”
Yu Yan lowered her eyelashes, and the two lapsed into silence. In truth, there were still many words left unsaid and many things to ask, but neither of them knew how to continue. They treaded with utmost caution around each other.
It was already very late, and Fu Yunqing was severely sleep-deprived. She had to be incredibly sleepy and tired right now; Yu Yan could see her exhaustion and knew she should let her sleep.
“Fu-jiejie…” Yu Yan snuggled deeper into her embrace, calling out to her in a pinched voice.
“Hmm?” Fu Yunqing looked down at her.
Yu Yan still wanted to act cute with jiejie before going to sleep, hoping to foster their relationship a bit. “To tell you the truth, I missed you so, so much during this time.”
Missed her so, so much?
Fu Yunqing waited for her to continue. Yu Yan shyly rubbed against her shoulder before saying, “I always saw you in my dreams, hugging you and kissing you…” Yu Yan wasn’t just sweet-talking; she really had dreamed about it, and more than once. “But when I woke up, there was nothing. It always made me so sad I wanted to cry. But I didn’t dare look for you, fearing you’d ignore me or snap at me, and I wouldn’t be able to bear the even deeper sadness.”
“I missed you so much…”
“The moment I realized I had amnesia, the very first person I wanted to find was you.”
“…”
Was that true?
Anyone could tell these words were calculated to make Fu Yunqing happy, yet Yu Yan’s intentionally aggrieved tone and those declarations of missing her jiejie still wormed their way into Fu Yunqing’s heart, stirring up waves of emotion. She met Yu Yan’s eyes, gazing into them for a long moment. Her expression was helpless, yet overflowing with indulgence and love.
She could do nothing with her.
Fu Yunqing slowly lowered her head. Yu Yan froze, thinking she was going to kiss her. Her body tensed up in sudden nervousness, thinking to herself, I haven’t even prepared myself yet! As it turned out, Fu Yunqing merely pressed a kiss to her forehead.
It was a reassuring kiss, accepting everything Yu Yan had expressed.
“All right, go to sleep.”
Yu Yan blinked, feeling her heart flutter.
Fu Yunqing turned to switch off the light, plunging the bedroom into darkness. Soon, that warm body returned to Yu Yan’s side, wrapping her in a tight embrace.
Yu Yan woke up very early the next morning, only to find herself still nestled in Fu Yunqing’s arms after a whole night. Snuggled together under the duvet, their shared warmth was so cozy that she didn’t want to move.
This was the first time she had slept with Fu Yunqing after everything that had happened, and she had been fully prepared for a sleepless night. Yet she had no idea when she had drifted off, and she had slept exceptionally soundly. Yu Yan looked up; Fu Yunqing was still asleep, her brow slightly furrowed.
Feeling a slight urge to use the restroom, Yu Yan carefully began to sit up, trying not to disturb her. However, Fu Yunqing seemed to be a very light sleeper; the very second Yu Yan pulled away, she opened her eyes.
Their eyes met, and Yu Yan froze. “Did I wake you?”
Fu Yunqing turned her face away slightly and rubbed her eyes, murmuring, “No.”
She had clearly been awoken.
“It’s still really early.” Yu Yan glanced at the clock on the wall; it was only seven in the morning. She asked in a soft voice, “Do you want to sleep a little longer?”
“No,” Fu Yunqing said as she sat up. Yu Yan propped herself up on the mattress and looked up at her. “Fu-jiejie… did you sleep well last night?”
“Mhm.”
For some reason, she felt that Fu Yunqing seemed quite different right after waking up. She appeared slightly more fragile, and the look in her eyes when she first opened them held a trace of anxiety, as if she were terrified that Yu Yan had vanished.
Was she having a nightmare before she woke up?
Fu Yunqing got out of bed to wash up, and Yu Yan followed close behind her. The bathroom had double vanities, allowing them to use it together. Was this how they used to live? Yu Yan felt a bit unaccustomed to it. She observed her surroundings closely; the skincare products here were all the brands she used to use.
When they went downstairs, breakfast was already laid out on the dining table. Sitting opposite Fu Yunqing to eat, Yu Yan had a great appetite today, thoroughly enjoying her meal.
After resting for a bit after breakfast, it was nearly time for the scheduled appointment. She set off for the hospital in a car with Fu Yunqing.
The woman driving was Dan Lin, the bodyguard who had stood watch at the door the previous day and refused to let Yu Yan leave. However, Yu Yan was never one to hold a grudge; she forgot all about their ‘kidnapping’ grudge in an instant and struck up a chat. Only then did she learn that Fu Yunqing had assigned Dan Lin as her personal driver and bodyguard three years ago, and she used to transport her to and from school regularly.
Standing at over 180 centimeters tall with an athletic build, formidable martial arts skills, and the strength of an ox, she was practically a heavenly dish in the lesbian circle. Upon asking, Yu Yan discovered that she was a police academy graduate who trained year-round and had even competed in sanda tournaments.
Filled with curiosity, Yu Yan peppered her with questions. Why hadn’t she joined the police force? Why hadn’t she continued her competitive sanda career? Now that she had retired, what kind of exercises did she usually do? She also complimented her great complexion and vibrant energy, to which Dan Lin smiled and answered one by one.
Just as she was chatting away with high spirits, Fu Yunqing, sitting beside her, suddenly spoke. “Yanyan.”
“What’s wrong?”
Dan Lin fell silent immediately. Yu Yan turned her attention back to Fu Yunqing, her eyes shining bright as she looked at her.
Fu Yunqing did not speak. Instead, she raised her hand and unhurriedly adjusted Yu Yan’s hair. After a long moment, she said, “Aren’t your bangs getting in your eyes?”
“Mhm… I suppose they are, a little.” Yu Yan lowered her head to feel it.
In truth, they were already covering her eyes quite a bit. Ever since she had “crossed over,” she hadn’t gotten her hair trimmed once.
“Do you want to grow them out?”
Yu Yan shook her head. “Not really.” She wasn’t tired of her straight bangs yet.
“How about I take you to get them cut after we see the doctor? Having them cover your eyes will affect your vision.”
Was Fu Yunqing really that concerned about her hair? Ah, so it was because bangs covering her eyes would affect her vision. Yu Yan chirped, “Okay~”
Yu Yan didn’t turn back to chat with the driver, because she had just thought of something far more important and exciting.
“Where is Honey now? Can I go see her after I get my hair trimmed?”
Remembering that she was the one who had abandoned Honey, Yu Yan’s tone softened, tinged with a hint of pleading. She took Fu Yunqing’s hand. “Can I?”
Fu Yunqing let her hold her hand. “How did you find out about Honey?”
“Because I logged into my old Weibo,” Yu Yan said, opening her phone and navigating to her profile page. “Look at this.”
Fu Yunqing was startled. “You looked at all of it?”
“Mhm!” Yu Yan said. “Otherwise, I wouldn’t have known that Fu-jiejie and I were actually dating. I had no idea I used to be this happy.”
“I never would have imagined someone would give me a kitten as a birthday present. I can’t even fathom how happy I must have been back then. Really… I’ve rewatched the videos jiejie posted ten thousand times already. I really, really want to see Honey.”
So that was why. That was why Yu Yan had suddenly turned back to look for her. Because she had lost her memories, because amidst her profound confusion, she had instinctively wanted to rely on the person she used to depend on. Otherwise…
Pulling herself together, Fu Yunqing squeezed her hand back. Suppressing the gloom in her heart, she gently agreed, “Mhm.”
Delighted, Yu Yan immediately pressed her advantage. “We can see her today?”
“After we see the doctor and get your hair cut.”
“Yay!~”
Twenty minutes later, the car drove into the hospital grounds.
This was a private hospital funded by the Fu Corporation, renowned within the industry for its top-tier neurosurgical medical team and advanced equipment.
Stepping inside, the relaxed mood Yu Yan had maintained began to grow a bit tense under the sterile atmosphere. Seeking medical care always brought a touch of anxiety.
Their hands, which had been clasped together in the car, didn’t separate even after they got out. Sensing Yu Yan’s unease, Fu Yunqing tightened her grip. Feeling reassured, Yu Yan leaned into her even more, wrapping her arms around Fu Yunqing’s arm.
Fu Yunqing turned her head to look at her, asking softly, “Nervous?”
Yu Yan: “Yeah.”
“Why?”
In short, she was just very anxious, with all sorts of terrifying thoughts cropping up in her head. What if she really had broken her brain? What if she had some brain disease that required surgery? If they had to perform a craniotomy, they would have to shave her head. She believed she would look good even bald, but the mere thought of a skull-opening procedure made her knees turn to jelly.
“I’m just scared…”
Fu Yunqing was actually anxious herself. She was far more terrified of something being wrong than Yu Yan was, unable to bear the thought of a devastating outcome. But in the face of an amnesiac Yanyan, who was completely lost regarding this world and herself, she had to be a steady pillar of support. “You don’t have a headache, and you haven’t felt uncomfortable. You’ve been perfectly fine for this long, so nothing will be wrong. Don’t worry.”
“It will be okay. I’m here.”
Yu Yan found it miraculous. Sometimes, a person could offer ten thousand words of comfort to no avail, while another needed only a single sentence, a glance, or… her mere presence. Indeed, Yu Yan’s anxiety dissipated considerably. She relaxed her mind during the examinations, feeling much less tense.
…
“Ms. Fu, based on the series of diagnostic results, there are no obvious abnormalities in the patient’s brain. Given that she does not typically experience symptoms like headaches, dizziness, or nausea, the amnesia is likely due to a localized, relatively mild functional impairment in her hippocampus following the impact, which resulted in the loss of those three years of memory.”
“Of course, we cannot rule out other possibilities.”
“For instance, it is possible that the patient has underlying psychological issues, carrying stress, trauma, or distressing emotions associated with a particular period. The physical impact may have merely been a triggering event, causing her to selectively forget that painful stretch of memory as a subconscious coping mechanism to escape it. However, confirming this type of psychogenic amnesia would require further testing, long-term observation, and deep clinical evaluation.”
Trauma, selective forgetting?
She… Fu Yunqing was stunned.
“That is just one possibility among many. Beyond that, there are many deeper and far more complex possibilities.”
“How long… will she remain amnesiac?”
“Memory loss can last for any duration of time; we cannot determine it for sure. She might recover very quickly, or it could take a long time,” the doctor explained. “But there is no need to worry. Her brain shows no obvious abnormalities, and she is otherwise perfectly healthy. She can absolutely go on living like a normal person, just without the memories of those three years. At least, that is how it looks for now.”
“Of course, we also have many effective treatment methods, such as pharmacotherapy, targeted equipment therapy, psychotherapy, and so forth. Many amnesia patients regain at least some of their memories after a few courses of treatment, and it is quite common for some to recover fully.”
“Then… is there any way to ensure her memories never return?” Fu Yunqing looked at her, a pained expression on her face.
“What?” The doctor was taken aback. “This…”
“Ms. Fu, given our current level of medical science, there is no way to guarantee that a patient’s memory will never return. We can only employ certain methods to minimize the likelihood of recovery. For example, avoiding any triggers, or reducing contact with people and things from her past that left a deep impression to prevent old memories from being jogged. We can also guide her to abandon the desire to regain her memories, encouraging her to accept the status quo and rely on her current circumstances. Pharmaceutical intervention is another option.”
“Pharmaceutical intervention?”
“Yes. However, these types of medications usually have severe side effects and will impact her physical health. No doctor would recommend taking them.”
…
After getting a full grasp of the situation, Fu Yunqing returned to the consultation room. Yu Yan was still sitting on the examination chair, waiting anxiously for the results. Hearing the door open, she immediately looked up. Seeing Fu Yunqing walk in, her drifting gaze finally found its anchor, landing on her with sheer dependence and trust. It was pure and untarnished, yet it pierced Fu Yunqing’s heart like a thorn.
“You may stand up now,” the doctor said gently to her.
Yu Yan slipped off the chair. As Fu Yunqing approached her side, Yu Yan looked up to meet her eyes, never expecting Fu Yunqing to lower her head and wrap her arms around her in a sudden embrace.
She pulled Yu Yan into a full embrace, holding her very, very tightly. With her chin resting on Fu Yunqing’s soft shoulder, Yu Yan sensed her strange emotional state and felt the arms around her waist tightening further. “Jiejie?”
Yu Yan turned her face slightly. She thought, Am I really that sick? Do I actually need a craniotomy? Yet at this moment, she didn’t feel like crying at all; she was only worried about Fu Yunqing.
“Yanyan.”
Fu Yunqing softly murmured her nickname, raising her hand to stroke the back of her head. Her movements were incredibly light, like a lingering, dense web wrapping itself around Yu Yan.
“What’s wrong with me?” Yu Yan asked.
“You are fine,” Fu Yunqing sighed in her heart. “There is nothing wrong. The doctor said you are very healthy. It’s just that the area of your brain used for storing memories suffered a localized injury, which is why you’re missing three years of memory. It won’t affect your life going forward.”
“Then when can I recover my memories?”
“Yanyan… the doctor said that the treatments are very grueling, and the chances of regaining your memory are incredibly slim.”
“Do you want to undergo treatment?”
Yu Yan asked, troubled, “How grueling is it?”
“You would have to take a lot of medicine and go through electroshock machines. It would feel awful. And even then, it might not work.”
She knew her too well. She knew Yanyan hated taking medicine, was terribly afraid of pain, and was exceptionally timid.
Hearing how grueling the treatment would be, with no guarantee of success and such slim odds, Yu Yan predictably recoiled. After a brief consideration, she said, “Then… then I won’t do it.”
“Jiejie, I don’t want to take medicine, and I don’t want to be electroshocked by machines.”
“All right.”
“It doesn’t matter. It’s okay if you don’t have those memories, Yanyan. I’ll be by your side and accompany you forever. You will always have a home—our home. We’ll start anew.”
She tilted her head, pressing a kiss to Yu Yan’s temple. “Let’s go home.”
0 Comments