Peaches and Plums Don’t Speak – Chapter 108
by Little PandaRest Assured
“Xiao Wu!”
“Eldest Brother!”
The two people in the room were on the verge of shouting.
Yan Yidong frowned, glaring at Yan Xi. “It’s just a simple dinner. Don’t be so sensitive!”
Yan Xi’s complexion looked terrible, her unadorned lips pale. She sank back into a chair. “Eldest Brother, I’ve been very tired lately. I don’t want to attend any dinner parties.”
Yan Yidong’s expression softened. Ultimately, his heart ached for his sister. He studied her face. “You aren’t getting any younger. Could you please spare some thought for your own lifelong event1⦔
Yan Xi cut him off. “Eldest Brother! Can’t I be in charge of my own affairs?”
“Of course you can,” Yan Yidong said. “I’m not forcing you. But if Mom and Dad were still here, wouldn’t they be worried about you?”
A shadow fell over Yan Xi’s face. “I can stay single for the rest of my life. I can take care of myself. You don’t need to worry about me.”
Yan Yidong nearly choked on a breath. “What kind of talk is that? What do you mean, ‘stay single for the rest of your life’?”
“Don’t worry about it.” Yan Xi rubbed her temples and stood up, eager to end the conversation.
Behind her, Yan Yidong’s face darkened. He wanted to yell and lecture her, but he couldn’t bear to. Bringing out Grandfather Yan and Grandmother Yan wouldn’t do any good now, either. After turning the problem over in his head, he suddenly said, “Well, you won’t listen to our advice anyway. Do we have to get Anzhi to talk to you?”
Unexpectedly, Yan Xi’s body stiffened. She whipped her head around and glared at him. “Don’t talk to her about this!”
Yan Yidong flinched, taken aback.
“Eldest Brother, did you hear me? Do not talk to her about this!” Yan Xi stared intently at Yan Yidong, her voice cold and forceful.
Yan Yidong furrowed his brow, completely baffled. “Fine, I won’t. Why are you throwing such a fit?”
Yan Xi turned away and walked out the door without another word.
Behind her, Yan Yidong said angrily, “You’ve got quite the temper now, haven’t you? Yelling at your own Eldest Brother!”
Their voices had carried. In the living room, Auntie Xin and Xiao Yutong had heard the argument loud and clear, and they watched as Yan Xi emerged with a frosty expression.
Auntie Xin hurried over. “Xiao Wu, aren’t you staying for dinner?”
“No.” Yan Xi went to grab her coat and slipped it on.
“Oh!” Auntie Xin exclaimed. “I bought a lot of groceries today, and Anzhi said she’s coming back too.”
Yan Xi’s movements faltered. “She’s coming back today?”
“Yes. She called and said she was coming home for dinner. I need to go check on the kitchen.” Saying this, Auntie Xin headed into the kitchen.
Yan Xi’s movements suddenly grew sluggish. She took a few steps toward the door, then retreated, looking thoroughly indecisive.
Nearby, Xiao Yutong had been reading a story to Junjun. She looked up and gave her a curious glance. “Xiao Wu, since Anzhi is coming back, you should stay and eat. You’ll have to eat dinner when you get back anyway.”
Yan Xi lowered her eyes. She stood there in a daze for a good ten seconds before finally saying, “No, I’d better head back to the station.”
Xiao Yutong studied her. “Are you not feeling well? You look terrible.”
Yan Xi forced a smile. “No,” she said, touching her face. “It’s probably just because I’m not wearing makeup.”
Auntie Xin called out from the kitchen, “Is it five o’clock yet? Anzhi said she’d be back by five. I stewed some chicken soup for her.”
Xiao Yutong checked the time. “Not yet. Anzhi hasn’t arrived.”
After saying this, she noticed that Yan Xiβwho had just declared she was heading back to the TV stationβwas still standing there. Her expression was exceedingly strange. She seemed spaced out, yet not quite; her feet shifted restlessly in her shoes, as if she were wrestling with a thought.
Her back was tense, as if she were nervous.
To Xiao Yutong, she looked exactly like Anzhi had when she was littleβdesperately wanting a piece of candy but too afraid to ask for it.
The next second, Yan Xi pulled a tube of lipstick from her purse. Just as she was about to uncap it, she seemed to remember something. She let out a faint sigh, put the lipstick back, and murmured, “I’ll be going back to the station now.”
It was an overcast day. The sky hung low, scattering a light flurry of snow and casting everything in a hazy gray.
Yan Xi’s car was parked in a small alley beside the bus stop.
From this angle, she had a perfect view of the buses pulling in.
A young woman stepped off the bus. She wore a backpack, her long hair falling loose around her shoulders. Her peach-tinted cheeks were tilted slightly downward as a few snowflakes drifted past, brushing her eyes.
She seemed a bit cold, raising her hands to gently breathe warmth onto them.
Yan Xi stared without blinking, watching until the girl disappeared from view.
Slowly, Yan Xi’s eyes grew wet.
On New Year’s Eve, wind and snow swept across Beicheng. The whole family crammed into the dining room for the reunion dinner, the air filled with laughter and cheerful chatter.
Everyone shared a few words about their harvests from the past year. The adults chuckled and kept things brief. When it was the younger generation’s turn, Yan Da Pang shared that he had found a girlfriend, Yan Xiao Pang mentioned he had just gone through a breakup, and Junjun announced that he had ranked first in his second-grade final exams.
When it came to Anzhi, she shared that she had been accepted to Harvard University for a five-year PhD program, which was equivalent to a combined master’s-doctoral program at a domestic university.
“Five years?” Several of her uncles and aunts felt reluctant to see her go for so long, but they were still happy for her, even raising their glasses to offer their congratulations.
Anzhi took a sip of wine and sat back down.
Only then did she dare to steal a glance at Yan Xi.
Yan Xi wasn’t looking at her. Her head was turned, deep in conversation with Grandmother Yan. Anzhi lowered her eyes.
But as Anzhi silently picked at the food in her bowl, Yan Xi’s gaze drifted over. It lingered on her side of the table for several long seconds before moving away.
Taking all of this in, Liu Yiyi sighed inwardly.
After dinner, following Spring Festival tradition, everyone kept Grandfather Yan and Grandmother Yan company while watching television. Yan Da Pang and Yan Xiao Pang huddled off to the side with their phones. Everyone munched on snacks and chatted.
Anzhi lingered for a little while before returning to her room.
Sitting on her bed was a paper box, and resting on top of the box was a thick red envelope. Anzhi picked it up, her heart feeling heavy. She opened the box to find a pink cashmere coat. She shook it out; the length was perfect for her. The style was simple and versatile, soft and quietβit was beautiful.
It even carried a faint, lingering fragrance.
Anzhi’s eyes moistened. She couldn’t help but rub her face against the collar.
Once her thesis defense was over, there was basically nothing left to do. All that remained were physical exams, vaccinations, submitting paperwork, and waiting for her visa to be approved.
Yang Mengmeng had smoothly been admitted to the Accounting Department of the School of Economics and Management at Beicheng University of Science and Technology, while Chen Wei had failed the Postgraduate Entrance Exam. He signed up for the civil service exam while planning to retake the entrance exam next year.
Everyone had their own plans, but they still promised to stay in touch. Even as the world shifted around them, the pure, unblemished hope of youth made them believe that as long as they held firm to their convictions, there was no hurdle they couldn’t clear.
Anzhi felt the same wayβexcept when it came to her love.
The morning light was brilliant. It was early summer, and the sky was a crystalline blue. Even the evening glow was gentle.
At dusk, a light rain had fallen. The jasmine flowers in the villa’s courtyard were dusted with rain and dew, exuding a fresh fragrance.
When Yan Xi returned home, it wasn’t until she flicked on the lights that she discovered Anzhi sitting in the living room. Hearing the noise, Anzhi looked up. Her gaze was quiet and beautiful, yet she stared at Yan Xi with unwavering intensity.
Yan Xi froze, instinctively averting her eyes. Having just gotten off work, her hair was tied back, and she wore a blouse and a long skirt. She stood rooted to the spot in silence before finally changing her shoes and stepping into the living room.
Yan Xi didn’t approach the sofa where Anzhi sat. Her steps faltered, and she ended up heading into the kitchen to pour a glass of water.
She zoned out again. Behind her came the sound of light, shallow footsteps. Yan Xi’s hand trembled, and water spilled over the brim of her cup. Just as she moved the cup awayβ¦
Anzhi called out from behind her. “Auntie⦔
Yan Xi’s heart shuddered. She pulled back her hand from reaching for a rag.
“Don’t move. And don’t turn around. I have something to say to you.”
Anzhi stood right behind her, her eyes rimmed with red. She stared at Yan Xi’s back. If she took just one more stepβjust closed that tiny sliver of distanceβshe could wrap her arms around her.
But she didn’t dare. Nor did she dare to look at Yan Xi’s face while speaking.
Yan Xi’s shoulders trembled. She waited for her to speak.
In that moment, the atmosphere in the room pulled taut. The spilled water on the counter slowly pooled together, dripping steadily from the edge.
“Rest assured,” Anzhi finally said after a long pause.
Yan Xi’s thick eyelashes fluttered downward, casting heavy, gloomy shadows beneath her eyes.
Those words spun in the air before crashing painfully into her heart. A faint, watery gleam welled up from the depths of her eyes.
“Ever since I was little, aside from studying, I’ve never been particularly bright. I don’t know how to talk to people, and I don’t know how to make people like me.”
“Aside from you, no one has ever been so good to me. And no one ever will be again.”
A powerful, bitter taste flooded Anzhi’s heart. She bit down hard on her lip, her dimples sinking inward with sorrow. “I was too greedy. I wanted other things from you.”
Yan Xi’s fingers gripping the edge of the counter had turned white. Her heart throbbed with an agony that stole her words.
“I like you so, so much, Auntie. And I love you. I hope you’ll be happy. I’ll be fine, too, so rest assured.”
“I’ll study hard over there. I’ll miss you, Auntie. When I’m in class, when I’m doing experiments, when I’m listening to lectures, when I’m going to the supermarketβ¦ I’ll always miss you.”
Anzhi’s eyes were already brimming with tears, her cheeks wet with them.
“When I’m tired, I’ll think of Auntie, and I’ll feel like I can push a little harderβlike I can strive to become someone amazing.”
“So, don’t worry about me.”
“So, please take care of yourself.”
Anzhi sobbed, her voice choking. She stepped forward and threw her arms tightly around Yan Xi’s shoulders. Then, she leaned over, stood on her tiptoes, and pressed a gentle kiss to Yan Xi’s neck.
It was the first time she had initiated a kiss. And it could only ever be this one time.
Then she clapped a hand over her mouth, let go of her, and bolted out the door.
Yan Xi’s entire body shook. She simply lacked the strength to hold herself up any longer. The moment the sound of the front door clicking shut reached her ears, her shoulders slumped, and she collapsed to the floor.
The second Anzhi ran outside, she dropped into a crouch. Covering her mouth, she let her tears fall uncontrollably. It took her a long while to calm down enough to slowly walk away.
She didn’t know what time it was. The summer night was long, and quite a few people were still out for a stroll. Anzhi’s vision was blurred with moisture. She seemed to notice a few curious glances cast her way, but she simply kept her head bowed as she walked.
She had confessed. From now on, they could never go back to how things were. She had lost Yan Xi forever.
She had no idea how long she walked before reaching a fountain in a park. Back in elementary school, she had skipped class and hidden out here.
There were fallen leaves on a nearby bench, but she didn’t care. She sat down.
Swept by the night breeze, the leaves rustled gently. Anzhi sat there in a daze, her face lowered.
She didn’t know how long she sat there before the realization hit her: no one was coming to find her anymore. She pressed her lips together and wiped at her aching eyes.
Staring at the ground, she remembered that time. She had covered the pavement in chemical elements drawn with chalk, and when she turned around, there was Yan Xi.
And she remembered it clearlyβbefore Yan Xi appeared, no one had come to pick her up. She had waited for so long. Even though she knew no one was coming, the little girl she had been still clung to hope. And then, her wait had been rewarded.
A smile touched Anzhi’s lips at the thought of Yan Xi. The tears gathered thicker and faster, eventually breaking into audible sobs.
It’s okay. She had grown up. She was no longer that unwanted little child.
Anzhi told that small version of herself in her heart.
It’s okay. She could take good care of herself now. From this day forward, even if she were entirely alone, she would think of the person she loved. Thinking of her, she would never feel lonely.
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