Peaches and Plums Don’t Speak – Chapter 74
by Little PandaNo Feelings Means No Feelings
Yan Xi knitted her brows. She felt this was a very serious problem.
She understood Anzhi’s insecurity. The girl probably thought that once Yan Xi started dating, she wouldn’t want her anymore. This child had always lacked a sense of security.
She had to deny it. She had to reassure her. “Taotao, that is impossible. This is your home. You will never have to move out.”
Anzhi kept her head lowered, saying nothing. Yan Xi couldn’t see her expression, so she instinctively stepped closer. Anzhi immediately took a step back.
Both of them froze in unison. Yan Xi pulled her hand back. Her expression looked a little empty, a little at a loss.
Down by her side, Anzhi’s fingers pinched hard into her own thigh.
An eerie silence stretched between them for what felt like a full minute.
Yan Xi’s lips parted. Just as she was about to break the silence and call out to her, Anzhi lifted her head and flashed her a brilliant smile. “Then I won’t go live at school.”
Her smile didn’t make Yan Xi feel like she was truly happy; instead, she detected a trace of bitterness hidden within it.
“You should hurry up and go. Don’t keep people waiting.” Anzhi continued to smile. Her expression was flawless. Yan Xi suspected she had just imagined that trace of bitterness.
Yan Xi’s gaze lingered on her face for a moment. She turned around. Her high heels pivoted on the floor, going clack, clack for two steps before she turned right back around, her skirt flaring out like a blossoming flower against the floor.
Yan Xi walked over to her, picking a topic to ask, “What were you busy with in the kitchen just now? Were you making a cake for me?”
Anzhi looked down and smiled softly. “Mm, just a small mango mille-crepe cake. But… aren’t you heading out? He’s been waiting for you for a long time.”
Since when did Anzhi stop looking at her when they spoke?
Yan Xi’s brow furrowed tightly. She watched as Anzhi finished speaking, then half-lowered her head to tidy up the baking tools—the egg beater, the bowls. Whatever needed washing was washed; once washed, they were put away.
Yan Xi stared at her fixedly as she worked, then said, “Bring the cake out. I want to eat it.”
“Ah? But it’s already eight o’clock, isn’t it?” Anzhi turned around in surprise.
“So what?” Yan Xi lightly smoothed her skirt and sat down at the dining table. “Today is my birthday, so I’m the boss. What I say goes.”
Anzhi pursed her lips into a smile.
This smile looks real, Yan Xi thought.
Anzhi took it out of the fridge: a 4-inch1 mango mille-crepe cake, exquisite and adorable.
Yan Xi could guess without even looking that it was packed with the mango chunks she loved so much.
“Right! There are candles! Do you want to light them?” Anzhi’s interest was piqued, her eyes sparkling. She excitedly dug out a small bag of colorful candles.
“…” Yan Xi wanted to say that she was thirty, not three, and that lighting candles was far too childish, but seeing how happy Anzhi looked, she nodded. “Let’s light one.”
“Hm? Thirty of them?” Anzhi said playfully.
Yan Xi couldn’t help but let her lips curl up. “What thirty? Could we even eat the cake after that? Just one is fine!”
“Alright then.” Anzhi had to pick through the bag. “Green, pink, yellow, blue… mm, pink?”
Yan Xi tilted her head slightly, giving her a look that clearly said: Do I look like someone who cares what color the candle is?
“Pink it is.” Anzhi selected one and lit it.
“Happy birthday! Oh, right! We need to turn off the lights!”
Yan Xi laughed. “No need, this is fine.” She blew out the candle.
“Ah! You just blew it out, you haven’t even made a wish yet!” Anzhi said in disappointment.
Yan Xi shrugged, looking like she didn’t care much.
“Alright.” Anzhi picked up a small knife and sliced into the crepe cake, revealing the dense, paper-thin layers of egg crepe and the translucent chunks of fruit.
Yan Xi cut a piece with her fork and put it in her mouth, her eyes narrowing slightly in satisfaction.
“Delicious.”
Anzhi especially loved the way she looked when she ate. When Yan Xi ate something she liked, she was incredibly childish. She continued to eat another piece of the cake just like that.
Anzhi hurriedly tried to persuade her, “Hey, you still have to go out to eat later.”
Yan Xi set down her fork, grabbed a tissue, and wiped her lips. “Good thing my lipstick doesn’t really smudge.”
Anzhi quickly stole a glance at her lips but couldn’t recognize the lipstick shade. Yan Xi wasn’t a crazy makeup enthusiast like Liu Yiyi; the lipstick brands she usually bought were Charlotte Tilbury and Tom Ford, though occasionally, the resident collector Liu Yiyi would give her MAC.
Who knew that Yan Xi’s current shade wasn’t any of those brands, but rather Clé de Peau Beauté’s shade 3102. The red had a hint of orange tones, making it less mature than a true red. Its velvet texture gave it a light, matte finish, making her lips look like a plump, vibrant, and luscious rose.
Perhaps Anzhi had been staring for a bit too long, because Yan Xi looked back at her curiously. It was obvious she had no idea the young girl’s heart was already pounding wildly. She merely assumed a fifteen-year-old girl would naturally be starting to take an interest in makeup.
Yan Xi smiled. “Do you want to wear lipstick too? Mm, it’s true that a lot of high school students wear makeup nowadays.” She carefully examined Anzhi’s small face. “But you don’t need makeup at all. Your natural skin tone is already beautiful.”
Anzhi’s cheeks burned. She lowered her eyelashes.
“Your natural lip color is very pretty too. Lip balm is all you need. Maybe… it’s time for you to use your first tinted lip balm.”
Anzhi could feel Yan Xi’s gaze resting on her mouth. She was so nervous she could hardly stand it, desperately wanting to bite her lip.
“A light orange shade or something similar would probably look great on you…” Yan Xi seemed to still be studying her. “Light pink should be nice too.”
Anzhi finally couldn’t take it anymore. Her face was flushed bright red. “Hurry up and leave! It’s getting too late!”
Yan Xi blinked, realizing the girl was embarrassed. She let out a soft chuckle. It felt as though the awkward distance that had grown between them over the past few months had suddenly vanished. Compared to Anzhi’s silent, withdrawn demeanor, Yan Xi truly loved teasing her and watching her shy reactions. Her mood lightened considerably.
She stood up. “Alright, alright, I’m going.”
Yan Xi walked out of the dining room. Anzhi followed her to the doorway, her lips moving before she stopped herself. She didn’t dare ask what time she would be back tonight, nor did she dare ask if she was coming back at all.
As Yan Xi reached the entryway, she felt a sudden urge to look back. Anzhi was leaning alone against the dining room door, watching her from afar.
Yan Xi’s heart suddenly clenched. She wanted to say something but stopped. Just then, Anzhi gave her a distant smile, waved her hand, and turned back inside.
Yan Xi stood frozen in place for several seconds before finally leaving the house. Even as she drove away, she was still wondering what that uncomfortable emotion was.
Was it guilt? Sadness? Heartache? It felt like all of them.
Anzhi wasn’t a little kid anymore; staying home alone for a few hours was perfectly fine. But that look in her eyes just now… Yan Xi couldn’t shake the feeling that she had missed something important.
She didn’t see that after Anzhi returned to the dining table, she looked at the cake Yan Xi hadn’t finished. Sitting down in the chair Yan Xi had just vacated, she picked up the fork Yan Xi had used and ate a small bite of the cake.
She couldn’t taste the cake at all. All she could hear was the deafening sound of her own heartbeat. Anzhi covered her face. I’m truly a lost cause.
It wasn’t until she entered the reserved restaurant that Yan Xi reined in her thoughts. Liao Chengyu was already waiting for her. He looked at her with eyes full of undisguised admiration and pulled out her chair for her before they both sat down.
“I’m sorry, did you wait long?”
“Not at all.”
The restaurant he had booked was a Michelin one-star French establishment with a lovely ambiance. A typical romantic restaurant for couples.
He was wearing a suit that suited him quite well, making him look handsome and stylish. In truth, Yan Xi’s standards for a man’s appearance weren’t overly high—clean and presentable were the basic requirements. Of course, if a man was handsome enough to make her heart skip an uncontrollable beat, she wouldn’t object.
Unfortunately, that hadn’t happened yet. Working at the television station and hosting galas, she had seen far too many incredibly handsome male celebrities. It was purely an aesthetic appreciation.
Yan Xi used to understand herself very well. She always felt that the exact moment her heart fluttered for someone was a mystery, so elusive she couldn’t even put it into words. But she knew that when that moment of infatuation finally arrived, she would absolutely recognize it. Yet right now, she couldn’t describe any such feeling. However, no feelings meant no feelings—that much she did know.
The dinner was excellent, but she was a little absentminded. She barely noticed what the appetizer was; she only knew she ate some avocado, and it was slightly tart. The escargot soup was decent, and the foie gras was tender. When it was time for dessert, the waiter brought out a birthday cake and the staff gathered around her to sing “Happy Birthday.”
Yan Xi’s smile turned a bit awkward at that moment. But since it was a kind gesture, she had no choice but to sit through it.
The cake was beautiful. It was heart-shaped, completely covered in sliced almonds, and topped with a wide assortment of fruits. But as Yan Xi looked at it, her mind drifted back to that small mango mille-crepe cake Anzhi had made for her earlier, and that childish pink candle.
She took only one bite of the cake before she couldn’t eat any more.
After dinner, they strolled along the street. The autumn night was deep and lush, the air beneath the trees flanking the road cool and carrying a faint floral scent.
“Are you alright? I feel like you’ve been very quiet today,” Liao Chengyu asked her.
Yan Xi’s eyelashes lowered. She was walking very slowly, almost counting her own steps. Hearing his words, she let out a self-deprecating smile. “Once you reach a certain age, celebrating birthdays isn’t as exciting anymore.”
Liao Chengyu smiled. “You feel that way too? In my eyes, you’ve always been beautiful. You’re wonderful.”
The look in his eyes was a little too deeply affectionate, and the awkward part was that Yan Xi couldn’t feel the romantic atmosphere at all.
She gave a soft “Mm” and lowered her head to avoid his gaze.
Liao Chengyu stepped closer. He reached out to hold her hand again. Yan Xi instinctively tensed up all over, suppressing the urge to pull away.
Then, a voice in her heart told her that she could no longer endure this, nor could she keep lying to herself.
“I have something to tell you,” Yan Xi said, withdrawing her hand and looking up at him.
The author has something to say:
Personally, I feel like Jinjiang’s input box is just too narrow. I looked at it for a bit while trying to fix typos, and my eyes started hurting. Every time I fix something, I have to scroll down again.
Sure enough, I have a lot of typos… Thank you all for bearing with me.
Footnotes
- In modern Chinese baking, cake sizes are commonly measured in standard inches rather than traditional Chinese inches (cùn). A 4-inch cake is a miniature cake meant for one or two people.
- A popular Japanese luxury beauty brand with a French name (Clé de Peau Beauté). In Chinese contexts, '310' refers to the brand's Extra Rich Lipstick in shade 310, a classic velvet matte color with a slight orange-red tint.
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