Substitute Alpha Gets Confessed to by Her Ex’s Aunt on a Survival Variety Show – Chapter 138
by Little PandaWhere the Sunlight Reaches
It was all just needless worry.
Nan Huaixu curved her lips slightly and said to Fei Tuoma, “Go on.”
Fei Tuoma looked at her, then at the quiet Liu Yinxi on the other side, and nodded.
She gathered her thoughts for a moment, then continued the story from where she had left off. “The year I was eight, the forest ranger came to our house as usual. But this time was different—she brought a letter stamped with a foreign postmark, addressed to Heloise.”
Young Fei Tuoma had seen that letter.
She still remembered some of the contents written on that beautiful paper printed with flower petals, soaked in blue-black ink, each character neat and precise.
—Heloise, my dearest daughter.
I saw your photographs scattering sunshine by Emerald Lake. Oh, it was magnificent.
I pray to the heavens every week, may the Holy Mother bless you to always keep such beauty.
The time left for me is running short. The world is always like this—some ascend to heaven, others face the trials of the mortal world anew. You understand.
If you can, that is to say, if you miss me too, perhaps you will come back to see me one last time, and take a photograph for me as full of vitality as the ones you took for your daughter and your wife.
I will carry it up to the sky, until the stars burn out.
—Your loving mother. Your longing mother. Odette.
“My grandmother was gravely ill. Mama packed her bags that very night and left the forest.” Fei Tuoma’s voice was heavy.
Heloise returned to her homeland.
Before she left, she promised her wife she would come back once she had settled her mother’s affairs.
Ruiliya waited in the forest with her daughter for over half a year, but news from her wife never came.
Then, the forest ranger brought a letter written in Tuowa script1. Heloise wrote joyfully that her mother was still alive—there was a newly developed drug on the market that could ease her mother’s condition. But the new medication was staggeringly expensive, and Heloise had to stay in London to work and earn money.
Pounds? Exchange rates? Tax rates?
These utterly foreign concepts were like a sorcerer’s curse to Ruiliya, who had grown up among rainforests and lakes. Even when each term was explained to her clearly, she could not fathom why they needed to exist.
Heloise said: It’s expensive because it’s a newly developed drug from a top-tier company.
Ruiliya asked: But the raw materials to make the medicine cost only a tiny amount.
She did not understand brand value or the cost of research and development, let alone the pricing monopoly and the hegemony it produced.
Ruiliya could not understand why a little raw material should be sold for so much. Was money more important than a person’s life?
In the tribe, no one would hoard precious herbs when a life could be saved.
Though she did not understand, Ruiliya knew she had to earn money to help Heloise’s mother.
When the invitation from her wife arrived, asking her to come to London, Ruiliya set out on the journey with her child and a friend from the tribe who had attended Heloise’s English classes—Luma.
Heloise had said her homeland was a nation of gentlemen and proper etiquette, with flourishing industry and fine whisky. Her home had a large garden full of roses, and Ruiliya and the child would surely love it.
That was what Ruiliya told Fei Tuoma, too.
Holding the letter, cradling her child, she pointed at the characters and described to her daughter the wonderful foreign land that Mama had painted with words.
Sweet carrot cake, crispy butter cookies, fluffy toy bears, colorful amusement parks…
Ruiliya stepped out of the station with her child in hand. Before she could spot her wife, she turned around and discovered her bag was gone.
She asked the people around her for help in English. Those white-skinned people in suits and leather shoes swept past her. Most were indifferent; a few threw her looks of contempt.
Suddenly, little Fei Tuoma let out a frightened cry. Ruiliya whipped around and saw two men in caps yanking at her daughter’s arms.
Luma clutched Fei Tuoma tight and refused to let go, cursing at them in broken English. The men laughed and drove them off. One of them grabbed Fei Tuoma’s hair and tried to yank off the jade necklace around her neck.
Her daughter was being attacked, the keepsake her wife had made by hand was being snatched away—Ruiliya saw red. She lunged at the two men and beat them to a pulp.
The three of them, who had traveled from a remote tropical island to a bustling metropolis, never did meet Heloise at the station as promised.
Heloise, worn ragged by work and her mother’s grave illness, found the three of them in tattered clothes at the police station.
She apologized to the police, paid a sum of money, and led them away.
Ruiliya rushed forward to embrace her. But Heloise ignored her smile and, with a face full of worry, said to her: Didn’t I tell you to watch the child and wait for me? You shouldn’t wander around a place you don’t know, and you certainly shouldn’t hit people. Ruiliya, this is a civilized city, not your primeval forest. Do you have any idea how much effort it takes me to earn a single sum of money?
Ruiliya frowned and lowered her head. She had thought her wife would hug her. She had thought her wife would ask if she was hurt. She had thought her wife would ask what the child had suffered.
Heloise did none of those things.
Heloise said this was a city. They needed to earn money and survive here together.
Heloise left early and returned late. Ruiliya learned to use electronic devices and transportation, tried to find work. Luma stayed home to look after Fei Tuoma.
The cost of living in the city was high. Ruiliya would catch small animals to supplement their meat supply. A few times she was spotted by neighbors and reported to animal protection. Heloise argued with Ruiliya over this.
Fei Tuoma’s skin color and appearance drew attacks from the neighborhood children. They threw stones and branches at her, called her a brown goblin who ate squirrels and frogs.
One day, Heloise took Ruiliya to the hospital to visit her mother. For the first time, Ruiliya saw a person reduced to a skeleton, stuck full of plastic tubes. The terrifying sight shook her to the core like an earthquake.
Ruiliya said to her wife: She is in agony. This is wrong. You should let your mother return to the embrace of the Earth God, Luo Yi.
Heloise stared at her in disbelief, eyes reddening: What are you saying! Do you want my mother to die?! There is no Earth God. You pray to spirits because you have no medical technology, because you can only watch your loved ones die. Modern society is different—at least it can keep people alive.
Ruiliya’s face darkened: But look at Odette now. She is like dried bark hanging in the wind. You think she is alive, but she is merely being moved by the wind. To live is the activity of life, not the prolongation of death.
Heloise shook her head at her: Look closely. Odette is alive. Her heart is beating. That is what it means to be alive. Ruiliya, you are being utterly unreasonable. Are you going to treat me like this, treat Fei Tuoma like this—just abandon us when the time comes? You can be so indifferent because it’s not your mother who is dying! You are too cruel. I don’t understand why I ever fell in love with you.
“Those expensive drugs weren’t as effective as Mama firmly believed. A few months later, Grandmother passed away.” Fei Tuoma’s expression was bitter, her hand stroking the Little Black Dog’s fur again and again. “My aunts and uncles blamed Mama for being reckless and willful. They said Grandmother had missed her constantly while she was alive and regretted bringing her along on the Jinzhou expedition. Mama also felt she bore great responsibility for Grandmother’s illness. Mami wanted to take Mama back to the forest, but Mama refused. Grandmother was gone—she didn’t want to lose the time she could spend with her brothers and sisters too. She wanted Mami and me to stay in the city.”
Ruiliya asked Heloise: What about me? I was expelled from the tribe for you. You found your people again, and I’m just supposed to sacrifice my family, is that it?
Heloise gave a cold laugh: You did it for me? Wasn’t that your own decision? Weren’t you the one who said “I love you” first? Then I can say I spent ten years as a savage for you. What I sacrificed wasn’t just family—it was all of modern civilization.
Ruiliya was silent for a moment, then twitched the corner of her mouth: If what you call modern civilization is theft, robbery, discrimination, and bullying, then Heloise, I can only say that I am the savage you so despise. And I always will be.
She knew Heloise was exhausted from work, so she never mentioned anything she had endured since arriving in the city.
She knew Ruiliya was unfamiliar with modern society, so she never told her what she suffered in the workplace.
At her most broken moment, Ruiliya had tried desperately to catch up with this world. But the gap was too vast. There wasn’t enough time.
She didn’t give her time, and she couldn’t wait for her.
In the end, it was always: you return to your city, I go back to my forest.
“Mami didn’t want me to suffer there, and I preferred the forest anyway, so she brought me back. Luma wanted to stay, but she didn’t have the qualifications and was deported back to Jinzhou Island. After returning, she found a way to move to a city on the island. The one colluding with the jade mining merchants to mine is her.” Fei Tuoma concluded the long retelling.
She spoke through gritted teeth: “Luma said that if my mother could abandon her family and the children at her school to have a baby with my Mami, she’s the sort who’d abandon her wife and kid without a second thought. She called my mother a rotten person. I fight her every time I see her, and it’s only gotten worse. Last time Luma injured my leg, Wofu bit her, so now Luma wants to kill Wofu on sight.”
The Little Black Dog whimpered pitifully.
Nan Huaixu rubbed the dog’s head and comforted Fei Tuoma: “Feelings are easily worn smooth by time and the sharp edges of life. Choose the path you want and walk it with conviction. You can’t refuse to live just because you’re afraid of making mistakes.”
Fei Tuoma nodded and asked, “This show of yours broadcasts what people say on television, and people all over the world can see it, right?”
Nan Huaixu replied, “Yes. International websites can access the livestream too.”
Fei Tuoma curved her lips: “The favor I wanted to ask of you has already been done.”
She turned to the robot dog, faced the camera, and said: “Heloise, Mama, I love you.”
“Ruiliya loves you.”
“The forest loves you.”
“May the Earth God protect you. You will always be the most brilliant dawn upon Emerald Lake.”
Wherever the sunlight reaches, that is your home with us, forever.
【Sniff Any students abroad in the UK? Help a kid out!】
【Yes yes yes! Already screen-recorded QAQ】
【A big content creator already posted about it, with lots of reposts.】
【With a tap of my fingers, my good deed for the day is done (praying)】
【Sigh, how should I put this… Luma, who colludes with the jade merchants, is pretty bad, but she’s not wrong. Casually abandoning your family to have a baby with someone overseas is irresponsible and unreliable.】
【If she didn’t have that fiery personality, there wouldn’t have been lightning-fast love either】
【Came in a flash, left in a flash~】
【So she just doesn’t care about the kid anymore?】
【She probably sends money? Though it doesn’t seem like Fei Tuoma needs it much…】
【How nice, watching a survival show and getting to hear a love-and-hatred story (snacking on melon seeds)】
【I only care what compensation Fei Tuoma is going to give Manman and Xixi (thinking)】
【Bring on more! Looks like once Luo Ling goes offline, Yu Yan drops out sick, and Huang Heshan gets seriously ill or breaks a leg, Xixi and Manman win. Yay!】
【Yu Yan & Huang Heshan: ???】
【Manman doesn’t look too happy.】
【Maybe hearing a tragic story made her lose hope in love.】
【Ah? No way! I still want my Huai-Liu sweet moments! (crying and throwing a tantrum)】
Fei Tuoma left.
She said she would bring the compensation tomorrow.
Deep in the night, raindrops tapped gently on the shelter roof.
Nan Huaixu lay in bed and asked the person beside her, “After hearing the story of Fei Tuoma’s mothers, what do you think?”
Liu Yinxi yawned. “In plain terms, it’s a long-distance relationship problem.”
Nan Huaixu sighed softly. It wasn’t that simple. “It’s not just the distance. The gap is too wide.”
Liu Yinxi smiled. “Even if the gap is wide, they’re still two human beings. They can communicate, they can learn, and they can slowly fill in each other’s gaps. Who cares if it takes ten years or fifty—love is love. What’s there to be afraid of?”
A string in Nan Huaixu’s heart seemed to resonate with Liu Yinxi’s words.
She slowly turned over and happened to meet Liu Yinxi’s smiling gaze.
Liu Yinxi said, “The person I love—I’d be mad for an hour at most, and then I’d go beg her.”
Nan Huaixu paused, leaning closer. “And what if she doesn’t reconcile?”
Liu Yinxi thought about it, raised an arm to pillow her head. “Depends on whether she’s annoyed with me or not. If not, I’ll coax her for a lifetime.”
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