Little Alpaca – Chapter 212
by Little PandaVolume 7: Extras
Old Stories of Ao’an (Part 1)
For thousands, for tens of thousands of years to come, let it be just like this.
A clever Ferocious Beast must certainly give much thought to the freedom of her canine body.
The white-haired god who had used the Fuzhu’s power to capture her and bring her here clearly had no intention of killing her. When gods didn’t outright exterminate Yao Beasts and Ferocious Beasts, it was an eighty-percent certainty they wanted to tame them into spiritual pets or mounts.
She, a Huodou, a magnificent Ferocious Beast of antiquity, would never let that white-haired god get his way.
He dreamed of making her submit obediently, but she would show him with her actions—DON’T! EVEN! THINK! ABOUT! IT!
Since the path of escape was blocked, she would first settle down and focus on healing. Once she regained a bit of her strength, she would show him the might of an ancient Ferocious Beast!
With this thought, the clever little dog settled down for a rare period of peace.
In the blink of an eye, the autumn leaves fell, and the winter snow arrived in silence.
It dyed the immortal mountain that imprisoned her a piercing, silvery white.
The Huodou nudged the door open with her little black head. Facing the cold wind, she squinted her eyes and cautiously extended a front paw, pressing a small paw print onto the pristine white snow.
“Are you cold?” Jian Li knelt softly beside her.
Cold?
Without spiritual power to protect my body, of course I’m cold!
But how could she, a magnificent Ferocious Beast of antiquity, show weakness at a time like this?
The Huodou suddenly lifted her head and puffed out her chest. Wagging her low-hanging tail, she bounded into the courtyard with big leaps.
In an instant, the ground was covered in tiny paw prints, like plum blossoms scattered across a canvas of pure white.
The birds wintering on the mountain came to circle low around her.
The little black dog couldn’t use her spiritual power. She wanted to pounce on one for a snack, but after trying for half a day, she couldn’t catch a single one. In the end, to save what little face she had left, she could only pretend she was playing happily with them.
As she kept up the pretense, she discovered that this kind of play was very different from the hunting and killing that had been her entire life before.
They truly weren’t afraid of her.
Never before had she imagined that she would one day play together with other living creatures.
But it wasn’t long before the little black dog was sneezing nonstop, and she retreated, shivering, back into the house, which was protected from the cold by a barrier.
Jian Li said, “Your body is still too weak.”
The Huodou retorted, “It’s all the fault of that Bad God with his ulterior motives for not undoing my seal! If he’d undone it sooner, wouldn’t I have recovered long ago?”
Jian Li said, “Xun Chi did it for your own good.”
The Huodou scoffed, “Just lies to trick a dog!”
Jian Li shook her head with a smile and said softly, “You and I are both Ferocious Beasts. Even if it wasn’t our intention, we have indeed caused many disasters. If we were defeated by the hands of those gods in the Heavenly Court, even if we weren’t executed, we would be reduced to spiritual pets or mounts, losing our freedom completely.”
“Aren’t you his spiritual pet now?”
“That’s different.”
“How is it different? Aren’t you both still working for a god?”
“But he has never forced me.”
“It seems gods don’t just trick people and dogs, they trick deer too.”
“…”
Jian Li fell silent for a moment, then rubbed the Huodou’s fluffy little head. “Ao’an Mountain is hidden in the Mortal Realm and doesn’t fall under the jurisdiction of the Heavenly Realm,” she said patiently. “Although Xun Chi is a god, he’s not like the ones in the heavens. You’ll understand one day.”
“Hmph!”
The little dog didn’t want to talk at all and turned her back on the stupid deer, showing her nothing but the dark fur on the back of her head.
A god was a god. How could he be any different?
Most of the Ferocious Beasts and Yao Beasts in the world were either subjugated and tamed by the Heavenly Realm or executed. Only Jian Li would believe there were good gods in this world.
She said Xun Chi had protected her under pressure from the Heavenly Realm, but wasn’t it just because he coveted her power and wanted to make her work for him?
She herself was the best example! That white-haired Bad God was no match for her at all. If he hadn’t relied on the Fuzhu’s power, forget capturing her, he probably would have had a hard time even facing her head-on.
There wasn’t a single good god in this world.
This Fuzhu had been deceived. That Bad God had given her a human-like name just to make her let go of her past as an ancient Ferocious Beast.
This stupid deer was hopeless, completely fooled.
It seemed that if she wanted to leave, she could only rely on herself.
But…
The Huodou unconsciously looked out the window.
Birds pecked at the snow on the branches, then preened the gray feathers on each other’s backs.
Their tiny heads bobbed up and down, sometimes tilting back to sing, sometimes landing on the windowsill to gaze back at her.
If, if…
The seal within her body remained forever.
Could this moment of peace last for eternity?
She was startled by her own thought and quickly buried her head in the blankets, no longer looking out the window.
Time seemed to pass very slowly. The Huodou always felt like she had been here for a very, very long time—so long that she had even gotten used to the bitter medicinal soup.
But on reflection, not much time had passed at all.
On a day when the winter snow was melting, the medicine she had been drinking for half a year finally stopped.
The moment she learned she no longer had to drink it, the Huodou was so happy she ran several laps around the courtyard.
At that moment, even the birds around her seemed to sing for her in celebration.
The spring wind had not yet arrived, and the winter days were still cold, but the little black dog’s heart was full of sunshine.
That night, Jian Li asked her if she had come to like Ao’an Mountain, even a little.
She shook her head without hesitation.
But the hesitation always came after the shake of her head.
The Huodou silently buried her head, letting the chaotic and contradictory thoughts wage a confused battle inside her small mind.
She had always wanted to leave this place. But if she really left, where could she go?
It seemed she…
had gotten quite used to life here.
But she shouldn’t have. She shouldn’t like this place, nor should she feel attached to it.
This was a god’s territory, after all!
The only reason she felt reluctant, she thought, must be because of that foolish white deer who had been deceived by a god.
If only she could take Jianjian with her.
The Three Realms were so vast. She would take her to a place with no gods.
A desolate land would be best. That way, they wouldn’t be used, and they wouldn’t be driven away.
When spring came, the courtyard filled with yellow and white wildflowers.
As the Huodou’s body recovered, Jian Li no longer restricted her from going out.
The little black dog plunged headfirst into a patch of flowers and rolled around. A moment later, she emerged covered in petals and pollen, then bounded over to another patch, joining the fluttering butterflies to smell the faint fragrance of spring.
Pollen entered her dark little nose, and the puppy couldn’t hold back a sneeze.
A hot spark instantly ignited the flowers before her.
The moment the fierce flames erupted, the white butterfly that had been perched on her nose flew away.
The Huodou froze on the spot.
She should have been used to such a scene, but for some reason, a sourness bloomed in her heart.
Why? Even with a seal locking away her power, did she still bring disaster to her surroundings?
Jian Li’s magic extinguished the flames. The flowers and grass were gone, leaving only a patch of scorched black earth.
The Huodou looked up at her, wanting to say something, but not knowing how to begin.
The reprimand she expected never came. Jian Li just knelt, her expression one of mock punishment as she gently pinched the little dog’s ear.
“I didn’t mean to…” she said in a small voice.
“I know you didn’t.”
“I can’t control it…”
“Then do you want to try trusting Xun Chi? To try learning how to control this power you were born with?”
“…” The Huodou was silent for a long time. Finally, she lay down low at Jian Li’s feet and gently rubbed her little head against her ankle, as if nodding.
Jian Li mentioned that Bad God again, she thought.
Seeing as this won’t do me any harm, I’ll condescend… condescend to learn from the Bad God for a bit.
Perhaps, after she escaped this place, a version of herself that could freely control her power wouldn’t be feared and ostracized everywhere like before.
From that day on, the Huodou unwillingly began to ask her most hated god for guidance on how to control her spiritual power.
She consoled herself that this was by no means a betrayal of her roots. It was merely a case of ‘not being ashamed to ask and learn from one’s subordinates.’1
In the days that followed, Xun Chi slightly weakened the seal within her body—this was to give her a little spiritual power to facilitate her learning.
The Ferocious Beast and the god had both made a concession. This could have been a very good beginning.
If not for a few accidents, it could have been a very good and complete story.
However, while the little black dog was small, her capacity for destruction was not.
Ever since she regained some spiritual power, more and more things in the hapless god’s home met with disaster.
The flowers and plants in the courtyard, the various pieces of furniture inside, the rare medicinal herbs brought from the Heavenly Realm, and the famous calligraphy and paintings found in the Mortal Realm.
Some of it was intentional, some was accidental, but all in all, everything suffered at the little black dog’s destructive paws.
The god, who usually had the air of an immortal2, was finally angered by a nimble little dog to the point of chasing her around the house with a broom—he’d gone mad, completely mad.
“Huodou! Stop hiding under the table and get out here!”
At that moment, the god holding the broom was probably thinking that the temperament he had cultivated over a lifetime of quiet practice had been utterly ruined by this stinking, coal-black dog.
“It wasn’t on purpose!” the little black dog yelled, shrinking her neck. “It’s your fault the heart-calming technique you taught me doesn’t work! I obviously practiced it, but I still set things on fire when I sneeze! Why are you yelling? I tried my best to swallow it back down!”
“You’re talking back!”
“I wasn’t watching her properly! Xun Chi, please calm down…”
Yes, every time the god wanted to discipline the little dog, Jian Li would be there, standing in front of her and speaking in a soft, gentle voice.
The little dog’s sighs of relief would not disappear; they would simply be transferred to a certain god.
After two consecutive deep breaths, Xun Chi calmed down. He sent the broom flying to a corner with his spiritual power and sighed helplessly. “Fine…”
Before the Huodou could rejoice, she heard Xun Chi continue.
“The spiritual power control technique I taught you, and that Heart-Calming Incantation.” At this, Xun Chi glanced at the little dog under the table. “Copy them all ten times!”
“Ten times?!” You might as well just kill me!
The little black dog let out a mournful whine, as if she no longer wanted to live.
Xun Chi frowned for a moment, then relented. “Five times! No negotiation!”
With that, he turned and left.
“I won’t copy it! I won’t!”
“I don’t even have hands! You’re deliberately making things difficult for me!”
“Bad God, you old white-haired thing! You locked me up with no good intentions at all! You’re just here to torture me!”
The Huodou thrashed and rolled under the table in a frenzy, one moment calling him “Bad God,” the next “damned white hair,” cursing him through gritted teeth.
But for all her madness and cursing, after her tantrum proved ineffective, the little black dog eventually crawled out from under the table, went to the study, hopped onto the desk, and picked up a thin brush with her mouth.
Jian Li followed quietly behind her, lit the candlestick for her, and opened the book to the page she had to copy.
“Later, when Xun Chi is asleep, I’ll help you,” she whispered, leaning close to the little dog’s ear.
The Huodou, brush in her mouth, looked up. As their eyes met, she tilted her fluffy head slightly.
Her ruby-bright eyes were full of joy.
The brush shaft suddenly snapped, a spark burning at the broken end. Jian Li pinched it out with practiced ease.
The Huodou let out a low whimper and, looking aggrieved, went to fetch another brush.
That night, the Huodou fell asleep early, her head resting on Jian Li’s lap.
The candle burned all night. When she woke again, Jian Li was slumped over the desk, fast asleep. A tall stack of copied pages was piled high on the corner of the desk.
Did she copy all night?
All five times, she had finished them all.
Jian Li’s handwriting was elegant and beautiful, a world apart from what she could produce holding a brush in her mouth.
The Huodou curled up on Jian Li’s lap again, waiting until she opened her eyes before daring to speak.
“The Bad God will be able to tell, won’t he?” What she really wanted to ask was, Why are you so good to me?
Hearing this, Jian Li rubbed her head and smiled. “Don’t worry, he won’t be able to tell.”
In fact, Xun Chi never did expose this act of ghostwriting. As soon as the copied pages were handed in, everything on Ao’an Mountain returned to normal, as if nothing had ever happened.
The Huodou had said Xun Chi’s techniques were useless, but that wasn’t true.
After days and days of hard practice, she was finally able to control the power she was born with.
Overjoyed, the first thing she did was pick a white flower for Jian Li.
The petals and leaves were not consumed by fire, allowing her to carry it all the way back to the small cabin on the mountain.
The little dog wagged her tail happily, barking indistinctly as she ran toward Jian Li, who was watering the flowers in the courtyard.
“Jian Li! I can control my power now!”
“Look, the flower I picked didn’t burn up! It’s for you!”
She raised her head high, as if wanting to place the flower in Jian Li’s hand.
Jian Li smiled and knelt, taking the small flower the Huodou had personally chosen. Her eyes were filled with an unconcealable joy.
“It’s beautiful,” she said.
At that moment, the little black dog looked up at the woman.
She’s beautiful, she thought.
Of all the countless human shells in the world, none was more beautiful than hers.
If she had a pair of human hands, she would want to place that flower in her simple hair.
“Jian Li, teach me how to take a human form, okay?”
“Hm?”
“I… I was just thinking, if I have to copy punishments again, it would be more convenient with hands,” she mumbled. “I don’t like human shells at all. It doesn’t feel like a Yao Beast anymore.”
Jian Li’s eyes curved into crescents.
This is probably the first time, she thought, that a Ferocious Beast, rejected by the world, has desperately wanted to step into the Mortal Realm that has ostracized it for its entire life.
From this moment on, she will be like I was back then, learning bit by bit how to love this mortal world.
And then, she will be willing to stay, forever and ever… by my side.
Several more years passed in a flash.
The day she successfully took human form was a day of swirling winter snow.
The Huodou bounced over to the bronze dressing mirror and admired the black-clad woman within for a long time. Finally, quite satisfied, she ran out the door, gathered her skirts, and followed Jian Li’s spiritual signature toward the distant, silver-white mountain forest.
“Jian Li! Jian Li! I’ve cultivated a human form!”
“Jian Li—Xun Chi—are you there—”
“Jian Li! Jian Li, where are you? I’ve cultivated a human form!”
Snow covered the mountains and fields. The young girl ran about, her steps sinking deep into the snow, calling out loudly with every steamy breath.
Every bell-like call was laden with pure joy.
She wore the most brilliant smile of winter, chasing after the little deer that was gentler than the spring breeze.
The creatures of the forest seemed to run with her, and the snow-filled sky seemed to dance for her.
Suddenly, her eyes lit up. She dashed forward and stood straight before Jian Li. “I’ve cultivated a human form!”
Jian Li looked at the little girl before her in astonishment, the delight in her eyes growing ever stronger.
“That’s wonderful!” She took the Huodou’s red, frozen hands and gently rubbed them, trying to give her some warmth. “Did you tell Xun Chi?”
The Huodou pouted. “Who knows where that white-haired guy ran off to? I can’t find him, so I’m not looking anymore!”
Jian Li nodded with a smile. “Then let’s not look. We’ll go back and wait for him. He’ll be very happy when he comes back and sees you’ve cultivated a human form.”
The Huodou didn’t believe her. “He doesn’t even like me. Why would he be happy?”
Jian Li reached out and tapped her little nose. “Nonsense. He does like you.”
Just as Jian Li had said, when Xun Chi returned, he looked at the pretty young girl before him, and a hint of pleasant surprise indeed showed in his eyes.
That night, for the first time, the three of them who had depended on each other on this immortal mountain sat at the same table for a meal—although Xun Chi had abstained from eating for millennia3, he still didn’t slight the two Yao Beasts.
At the dinner table, the Huodou stared at Xun Chi’s wine flagon for a long time, unable to suppress her curiosity.
The Bad God never touched a bite of food on normal days, but he loved to drink that stuff. She had been dying to know what it tasted like for a long time.
“Hey! Bad God, I want some wine too!”
Xun Chi was stunned for half a second. When he came to his senses, he was both angry and amused.
“No respect for your elders. Is that how I taught you to address people?”
Fine, then she wouldn’t call him Bad God.
The Huodou pointed at the wine flagon and changed her tune. “Xun Chi! I want to drink that too!”
With a slight movement of his fingertips, Xun Chi poured wine into a bowl.
He pushed the bowl in front of the Huodou, a silent, smiling gaze fixed on the impudent little girl.
Without a second thought, the Huodou picked up the bowl and downed it in one gulp.
The next second, the Ferocious Beast who had just painstakingly learned to control her innate fire performed a circus trick, spitting out a ball of flame between coughs and splutters.
The Bad God’s laughter rang in her ears, sounding thoroughly rotten.
What’s wrong with him? How can anyone drink something so disgusting day in and day out?
Once the Huodou recovered, she drank several glasses of plain water to wash away some of the spicy, choking sensation.
She felt a little dizzy. Just as she was about to ask if this wretched stuff was even fit for a dog to drink, she heard Jian Li ask with a smile, “Huodou, have you ever thought of a name for yourself?”
The Huodou blinked and shook her head. “Everyone calls me Huodou, so I’m Huodou. What other name do I need?”
“That won’t do.” Jian Li shook her head. “Whether Yao or beast, once you cultivate a human form, you should have a more human-like name.”
The little girl thought for a moment, then pouted at Jian Li. “Then you pick one for me?”
“Me?” Jian Li pondered for a moment, then cast a pleading look at Xun Chi, who was drinking alone beside them.
Xun Chi looked up at the bright moon outside, mused for a moment, and smiled. “How about Yue Zhuo?”
“Yue Zhuo?” The little girl glanced at the wine cup in Xun Chi’s hand, confused. “The ‘zhuo’ from pouring wine?4”
Xun Chi shook his head.
He said, Zhuo means brilliant and blazing, bright and fervent. That is fire. A bright fire, besides harming others, can also drive out darkness. That is light.
Fire is light, and the moon is also light.
If the Ferocious Beast Huodou could let go of her past, perhaps she too could become like the moon—the gentlest, most harmless light in the world.
“Yue Zhuo…” Jian Li repeated the name, then turned to the Huodou beside her and asked with a smile, “What do you think?”
“Gods sure do talk a lot of nonsense…” the Huodou muttered under her breath, her gaze unconsciously following Xun Chi’s out the window.
The moonlight reflected off the snow-covered mountains, as if gently brushing away the unsightly past, which was like so much smoke and dust.
Could she really stay here, and live a peaceful life with Jian Li from now on?
After a few seconds of silence, the Huodou retracted her gaze and said, “But, the name you white-haired guy came up with isn’t bad. I’ll take it for now.”
“No respect for your elders…” Xun Chi put down his wine cup and shook his head with a smile, no anger in his eyes.
The Huodou knew that the Bad God only seemed bad. In many matters, he just turned a blind eye.
She believed Jian Li’s words now. Ao’an Mountain was indeed not under the jurisdiction of the Heavenly Realm, and Xun Chi was different from other gods. He truly wanted to help them.
This place was truly wonderful.
So wonderful that she was a little afraid she didn’t deserve it.
She was beginning to understand why Jian Li was willing to give up the name of Fuzhu to stay here.
She didn’t want to be a Huodou anymore either. She wanted to become Yue Zhuo, a Yue Zhuo who could be accepted by this world.
“Jian Li, will I be the most harmless light in the world?”
She asked softly, as if seeking a stable future for her insecure heart.
Jian Li tucked a strand of hair that had been ruffled by the wind behind her ear and answered gently, “You will. When you grow up, you definitely will.”
“Then you have to stay with me!” Yue Zhuo said.
“I’ll stay with you. Both Xun Chi and I will always stay with you.”
“We’re not playing with the Bad God!” Yue Zhuo huffed, then muttered without much conviction, “He tricked me into drinking that weird stuff!”
“Oh, you.” Jian Li couldn’t help but laugh.
“Fine, now I’m the one in the way.”
Xun Chi stood up nonchalantly, took his wine flagon, and flew with a smile to the roof.
Yue Zhuo opened her mouth, wanting to explain something.
But in the end, she couldn’t get any words out.
There’s probably no need to explain, she thought. The Bad God won’t mind.
After all, before she had learned to control her power, she had caused every kind of trouble imaginable, and the Bad God hadn’t swept her out the door, had he?
But speaking of which, these past few years had been truly incredible.
She had actually come to like this place, and had actually put herself into the human shell she once disliked the most.
So it turned out she had long stopped wanting to live in a purgatory of scorching flames, accompanied by ashes dancing on the wind, hiding everywhere just to survive.
The mountains and waters of Ao’an, the moonlight of Ao’an, and the endless expanse of ice and snow were all as clean as Jian Li, as if they could extinguish the most heart-searing flames in the world.
Before, she had only found it all blinding.
But now, she knew it wasn’t disgust, but a fear of touching it.
She really, really, really…
had come to like Jian Li, and to like this place.
If she could, for thousands, for tens of thousands of years to come, let it be just like this.
She would stay here. No matter what happened, she would never, ever leave.
The author has something to say:
Perhaps if there had been a little more time back then, she would have grown up.
That’s all. Farewell again, and see you in the new book.
Footnotes
- 'Not to be ashamed to ask and learn from one's subordinates' (bùchǐxiàwèn) is a classical idiom praising humility in learning, even from those of lower status. Yue Zhuo uses it sarcastically to justify learning from her enemy.
- 'Immortal wind and Daoist bones' (xiānfēngdàogǔ) is an idiom describing someone with a transcendent, otherworldly bearing, as if they were an immortal.
- 'Bìgǔ' is a Daoist practice of abstaining from grains and worldly foods, believed to purify the body and lead to immortality. Those who have achieved this state no longer need to eat.
- Yue Zhuo mishears her new name, 月灼 (Yuè Zhuó), as the homophone 月酌 (yuè zhuó). The character 灼 (zhuó) means 'brilliant' or 'scorching,' while 酌 (zhuó) means 'to pour wine.'
0 Comments