STT – Chapter 6

Happy Birthday, Lu Zizheng

The next day after breakfast, Lu Zizheng, along with Lian Xuan’s assistant, Ji Yao, and Lian Xuan, discussed the specific details of the afternoon cooperation with the Japanese-funded enterprise at the Jiangbei branch office. When Lu Zizheng first saw Lian Xuan, there was a moment of awkwardness, but Lian Xuan, acting as if nothing had happened, took out the documents and calmly sat opposite Lu Zizheng.

Lu Zizheng frowned, watching Lian Xuan’s composed demeanor, and couldn’t help but wonder if everything that happened last night was just her overthinking.

She smiled bitterly, having spent the night tossing and turning, unable to sleep.

The afternoon cooperation went smoothly, and the two parties agreed to have dinner together in the evening. At the dinner table, Lian Xuan surprisingly drank every toast offered, as if she could drink a thousand cups without getting drunk.

Lu Zizheng wasn’t familiar with Lian Xuan’s usual drinking habits, but she could see that the assistant and Ji Yao were somewhat surprised, with an anxious look on their faces.

As the banquet ended and the guests dispersed, the bright lights were already on. Walking out of the club, it was unexpectedly quiet all around.

Ji Yao helped Lian Xuan into the car and, after some hesitation, instructed Lu Zizheng, “She drank a bit too much. If anything happens, please take good care of her.”

Lu Zizheng nodded and got into the back seat of the car with Lian Xuan.

Shortly after the car started, Lian Xuan turned her face and asked weakly, “Can I lean on your shoulder? My head hurts, and I want to sleep for a while.”

Lu Zizheng bit her lip, not knowing how to refuse. She knew that she had always been soft-hearted. So, in the end, she stiffly moved a little closer and lowered her left shoulder.

Lian Xuan, without any hesitation, leaned her head on Lu Zizheng’s slightly thin shoulder.

Many years ago, when Lian Xuan leaned her head on her shoulder, Lu Zizheng felt it was very heavy, as if she was bearing the weight of the entire world, filled with joy. Now, Lu Zizheng still felt it was very heavy, her heart weighed down like a huge stone, making it hard to breathe.

Halfway through the drive, Lian Xuan suddenly sat up straight and gently instructed, “Xiao Wang, stop the car on the side. I want to get out and get some fresh air.”

Lu Zizheng looked at Lian Xuan in astonishment, not understanding why.

The car stopped on a section of Huanhai Road. Lian Xuan opened the car door and got out, and Lu Zizheng had no choice but to accompany her.

On Huanhai Road late at night, there were only passing vehicles, the howling sea breeze, and the tall streetlights standing in solitude. Lian Xuan walked unsteadily along the railing, staggering under the streetlights.

Lu Zizheng slowed her steps, following behind her, watching her figure sway in the night, casting a long, thin, lonely shadow.

Suddenly, Lian Xuan stopped, leaned against the railing, turned to look at Lu Zizheng, and smiled, saying, “This stretch of road feels familiar, as if I’ve walked it a thousand times in my dreams.”

Lu Zizheng stood diagonally opposite her, looking around in silence, waiting for Lian Xuan to continue.

Lian Xuan sighed with a bitter smile, “Zizheng, you’ve grown up. It seems like you’ve become much more silent.”

Lu Zizheng was speechless.

Lian Xuan didn’t know that it wasn’t that the current her had become silent, but rather that the former her, when facing Lian Xuan, always had endless words and emotions to share.

Lian Xuan continued talking to herself: “This place is so much like that stretch of the island road we went to that year. The vast sea, the endless asphalt road…” She seemed to be lost in endless memories, her eyes glistening, her lips smiling: “Back then, there was a willow tree by the roadside, just sprouting new buds, and you joked about how I couldn’t recognize what kind of tree it was…”

“We rented a tandem bicycle, and you patted your chest, assuring me you could ride it. But as soon as we got on, you started wobbling all over the place, and I was so scared that I was laughing and shouting behind you. You even complained that I was too noisy and told me to be quiet. Later, you got the hang of it, and the bike started to ride smoothly, but you still deliberately swayed to scare me. When I worriedly patted your back, you would turn around and give me a smug smile…”

She looked at Lu Zizheng, her eyes unblinking, her tone tender and lingering: “Zizheng, you don’t know, at that moment I was thinking, if only this road had no end, we could keep riding forever…”

Lu Zizheng pressed her lips together, feeling a bit dazed for a moment, her nose tingling with a hint of sourness. But, wasn’t it Lian Xuan who jumped off the bike first?

She walked to Lian Xuan’s side, standing next to her. Lian Xuan couldn’t see her expression, only hearing her faint response: “Is that so? It’s been so long, I’ve forgotten…”

Lian Xuan quietly looked at her silhouette for a moment, then turned back, continuing to walk along the road ahead. Her tone was low and tinged with melancholy, her voice quickly swallowed by the sea breeze: “Is that so, I thought it was just yesterday…”

The wind grew stronger. Lian Xuan was dressed lightly, crossing her arms to keep warm.

Lu Zizheng stood still, watching her continue to walk forward endlessly. She took a few steps to catch up, took off her coat, draped it over Lian Xuan’s shoulders, and said softly, “It’s cold, let’s go back. Be careful not to catch a cold.”

Lian Xuan looked up and gave her a deep look, then lowered her head, pressed her lips together, and gave a faint smile, saying, “Okay…” Her hand tightened around Lu Zizheng’s coat, which still retained Lu Zizheng’s warmth.

On the way back, neither of them spoke again. Lian Xuan closed her eyes, seemingly exhausted and asleep.

Lu Zizheng glanced sideways at her, pondering whether Lian Xuan missed the her of the past, or her own past self?

But, regardless of whether it was the current Lian Xuan or the Lian Xuan of the past, how much genuine affection did she ever have for her?

Now, why must she display such an air of deep longing?

In the following three days, Lian Xuan was extremely busy, and Lu Zizheng communicated with her assistant. Occasionally, when she encountered Lian Xuan, she always wore the same standard, formal smile. Lu Zizheng thought, the incident on Huanhai Road that night was probably just an occasional lapse in sobriety; no one would mention it again.

On Lu Zizheng’s birthday, she didn’t go anywhere and stayed in her hotel room, doing translation work all day.

Around noon, Mother Lu called to remind her to buy herself a bowl of noodles in the evening and eat an egg, promising to make up for the birthday meal when she got back.

Lu Zizheng playfully told her mother that only mothers are good in this world.

After hanging up the phone, Lu Zizheng looked at the contact entry “Jiang Huaixi” in her address book and murmured to herself, “Not even a single phone call. Couldn’t deliver the gift, and even skipped the well-wishes?”

At around seven in the evening, Lu Zizheng finally went to the hotel restaurant downstairs and had a bowl of noodles and an egg, considering it her celebration of her 27th birthday.

She put down the bowl and chopsticks, looked at the reflection of her face on the surface of the white bowl, and silently said to herself, “Happy Birthday.”

Suddenly, her phone rang. It was Lian Xuan, who had been silent for many days.

Lian Xuan’s voice was calm and steady: “Come to my room.”

The door was half open. Lu Zizheng knocked twice and heard Lian Xuan say, “Please come in,” so she pushed the door open and entered. She had thought that Lian Xuan wanted to give her instructions for the next few days’ affairs. Unexpectedly, upon entering, she saw that Lian Xuan had removed her makeup and taken off her coat, wearing only a shirt, looking ready to rest. She was sitting on the sofa, with a small lamp on, and was slightly closing her eyes, listening to music.

Seeing Lu Zizheng enter, Lian Xuan smiled and gestured with her hand towards the sofa opposite her, indicating for Lu Zizheng to sit down. Then, she took a box out of a bag beside her and pushed it across the glass coffee table in front of Lu Zizheng, saying in a cheerful tone, “Happy Birthday. A birthday gift, open it and see if you like it.”

Lu Zizheng had not expected that Lian Xuan would remember. For a moment, she was overwhelmed with mixed emotions. Was she happy or sad, joyous or melancholic? Even she found it hard to distinguish.

In the end, all her emotions condensed into a bitter smile at the corner of her lips: “Director Lian, accepting your wishes is enough for me, thank you. The gift is too valuable.” As she spoke, she pushed the box back.

Lian Xuan’s smile did not fade. She gazed at Lu Zizheng and joked, “In the past, when I gave you gifts, you never considered their value. Didn’t you say that no matter how valuable they were, they couldn’t be more precious than my feelings?”

Lu Zizheng pressed her lips together and looked at Lian Xuan. Finally, she could no longer suppress the years of grievance and resentment in her heart. Why, all these years, was she the only one who kept dwelling on it, harshly blaming herself, while Lian Xuan felt no guilt and didn’t even want to give her a bit of an explanation? She never knew that someone with such a good memory as Lian Xuan could be so forgetful.

She spoke coldly, her face expressionless: “You said it yourself, it was in the past, wasn’t it? People change.”

Lian Xuan’s smile froze at the corner of her lips.

Lu Zizheng stood up and said indifferently, “Thank you for your wishes, Director Lian. If there’s nothing else, I’ll be leaving now.”

Lian Xuan finally lost her composure and hurriedly stood up as well, blurting out, “Wait, Zizheng, about what happened back then…” Before she could finish her sentence, Lu Zizheng’s phone rang.

Lu Zizheng glanced at her, then walked over to the window to answer the call.

She heard Lu Zizheng ask with a smile on her lips, “I’m already by the window, what’s up?”

Then, she and Lu Zizheng both saw the giant screen on the opposite building go dark. Suddenly, it lit up again, displaying a photo of a girl with a ponytail, dressed in sportswear, running—it was Lu Zizheng. The billboard on the street read, “Xiamen International Marathon.”

After a while, the screen went dark again, and lines of text began to jump up: “Lu Zizheng, happy birthday. The road of life is long, you’ve just completed at most a quarter of it. Don’t slack off, keep pushing forward.”

Lu Zizheng’s eyes widened, looking out the window in shock, her voice a bit unsteady as she urgently asked, “Where are you?”

In just a moment, Lian Xuan heard Lu Zizheng hang up the phone and hurriedly head out the door, saying to her as she walked, “Sorry, Director Lian, something came up. I have to go.”

She left so urgently and hurriedly that she didn’t have time to hear the words Lian Xuan was about to say: “What happened back then was my fault.”

Lian Xuan stood in place, watching the joyful and hurried figure of Lu Zizheng leaving, only feeling a slight pain in her heart.

For the first time in her life, she compromised with herself and decided to let go and fulfill herself, but Lu Zizheng did not give her the chance.

She had long known that the world is very fair, that everything requires giving up something to gain something. But at this moment, why did she still feel so full of reluctance and unwillingness?

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June 29, 2024

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