Betrayal
Betrayed that one and only
Jian Qing analyzed the situation with the director slowly and methodically: “I have observed for a period of time; she has no sensory impairment, no thought disorder, no emotional disorder. In the differential diagnosis, schizophrenia within the scope of mental illness can be ruled out. It is more like multiple personality disorder within the scope of psychological illness.”
Multiple personality disorder is a type of psychological illness, also known as dissociative identity disorder, abbreviated as DID, which means that a person’s character traits are expressed in two or more roles.
Lu Yinxi stood up wanting to slam the table, Jian Qing pressed her shoulder and pushed her back onto the chair: “Behave.”
Lu Yinxi sat down obediently, defending herself: “I am not ill.”
The old director looked at her with even more kindly eyes.
——Every patient who is forcibly brought in for treatment will say that they are not ill.
“Stop it.” Jian Qing stood behind her, hugging her shoulders, her tone much gentler than usual.
She continued to describe the condition to the director: “So far, I have only discovered two personalities. The previous personality had no knowledge of medical science, was relatively weak in character, and had no aggressiveness.”
“The current personality is female, relatively mature in character, with independent memory, behavior habits, thought processes, and self-awareness, and also has some understanding of medical knowledge.”
Director: “Does the current personality exhibit strong aggressiveness?”
Jian Qing: “It’s alright, just a little.”
Doesn’t this imply that she is a bit fierce?
Lu Yinxi grabbed Jian Qing’s hand that was holding her and couldn’t help but want to take a bite.
But wouldn’t biting prove that she really has aggression?
The director asked, “Do the two personalities know of each other’s existence?”
Jian Qing said, “I don’t know. She experiences time loss, doesn’t remember what happened during certain periods, and at the beginning, she even forgot my name.”
The director asked, “Any signs of depression?”
Research shows that most DID patients also suffer from depression.
“No, short-term contact reveals that this personality is relatively cheerful, but she had trauma during her childhood, experiencing isolation and bullying from peers.”
The director nodded, “Childhood is a critical stage for personality formation. Many DID patients have experienced psychological trauma during childhood, and the emergence of another personality is a form of self-protection. Of course, this situation is quite complex, and we cannot easily make a diagnosis. Let’s start with a few assessments first.”
The more they talked, the more outrageous it became, even bringing up childhood scars for discussion. Lu Yinxi was utterly enraged. She lifted Jian Qing’s sleeve and viciously bit down on her left wrist.
A sharp pain suddenly shot through her arm. Jian Qing hissed and loosened her grip on Lu Yinxi.
Taking advantage of the moment, Lu Yinxi stood up, pushed Jian Qing away, and quickly walked out of the consultation room.
Scum, trash, bastard…
Lu Yinxi cursed silently in her heart as she briskly walked out of the hospital.
She took a few deep breaths and silently recited 《Don’t Get Angry》 in her heart.
When she reached the line “Getting angry over trivial matters, what’s the point when you think about it later,” Jian Qing caught up with her.
Seeing that indifferent face, Lu Yinxi’s anger flared up again. She pointed at her and cursed word by word, “You are such a bastard!”
After cursing, she turned around and walked away.
Jian Qing neither got angry nor explained. Keeping a distance of about one meter, she silently followed behind Lu Yinxi.
Lu Yinxi wandered aimlessly and unknowingly drifted back to the campus.
She stood in front of the signpost, located the position of the campus sports field, memorized the direction, and accurately found her way to the sports field thanks to her good sense of direction.
The person behind her was like a mute, not uttering a single word.
Lu Yinxi suspected that if she turned around now and slapped Jian Qing, Jian Qing would still remain just as calm.
With someone like this, it’s impossible to even have a proper argument.
Lu Yinxi is not the type to hold in her anger, but she also doesn’t want to vent her emotions through arguing.
When she reached the sports field, she took off her coat and hung it on the railing, tied up her hair, squatted down to tighten her shoelaces, did some warm-up exercises, and then jogged along the 400-meter track.
She completely ignored Jian Qing’s presence the whole time.
During the final exam month, there weren’t many people exercising. There were only a few scattered students and some staff from the hospital on the sports field.
Jian Qing took out her phone from her pocket and turned the volume to the maximum.
In clinical practice, unexpected situations often arise, and regardless of whether one is on duty, they may be called back to the hospital.
She took Lu Yinxi’s coat that was hanging on the railing, walked to the self-service machine at the entrance of the sports field, and bought a pack of wet wipes and a bottle of saline drink.
Then she walked back to the sports field, went to the stands, and asked a classmate nearby for a sheet of scrap paper to sit on at the edge of the stands.
She rolled up her left sleeve, looked down at the bite mark, pondered for a moment, and then looked up towards Lu Yinxi on the track.
Lu Yinxi was running with her head down, transforming all her grievances and resentment into sweat that evaporated.
(If you're not reading on littlepandatranslations.com, it means this has been stolen)
After finishing a lap, she habitually looked up to glance in the direction of her coat.
It was gone!
She slowed her steps, her eyes searching around, and finally saw the familiar figure and her coat in the stands.
Humph, just like Dong Yong stealing the fairy’s clothes, shameless! (The Fairy and the Woodcutter)
Lu Yinxi snorted coldly and continued running laps.
On the second lap, she began to discard her anger and resentment, silently formulating a fitness plan in her heart.
After all, she was an actress, no longer a medical student. Physical appearance and lines were fundamental skills. She couldn’t waste time just because she had entered this unfamiliar world; maybe one day she could return to the real world.
Keep a long-term perspective; everything before your eyes is fleeting. Returning to the real world is the most important thing.
On the third lap, Lu Yinxi glanced again in Jian Qing’s direction.
Jian Qing happened to be looking at her too.
The two of them stared at each other from a distance for five seconds.
Hmph.
Lu Yinxi snorted coldly again and turned her gaze away.
She still felt somewhat aggrieved.
After spending so many days together, she had finally built up some trust, willing to share her past, talk about her childhood, tell her about her parents and family, and even show her the scars from her childhood.
From childhood to adulthood, she had only shown them to her.
But she thought she was sick, clinically presenting them as a medical history to others.
Being betrayed in her trust was the thing that made her the saddest.
Her nose felt a bit sour, Lu Yinxi sniffled, silently running, deciding never to share her inner thoughts with that scum again.
By the fourth lap, a large amount of lactic acid had accumulated in her body, her legs were aching and weak, her body was lacking oxygen, and she started to breathe uncontrollably through her mouth, unable to concentrate. So she slowed her pace even more.
The limit of this body was five laps.
Jian Qing’s gaze continuously followed Lu Yinxi.
Some classmates around recognized Jian Qing and greeted her with surprise. Only then did she look away, turn around to nod politely, and then continued watching Lu Yinxi.
A mischievous classmate winked and gossiped, “Teacher, are you exercising with your boyfriend?”
Jian Qing shook her head.
“Then who are you with?”
“A pufferfish.”
An angry pufferfish.
The classmate didn’t understand, “What?”
“Classmate, there are only ten days left until the exam. Have you finished reviewing?”
A soul-searching question from the teacher. The student, carrying a heavy backpack, clutched his chest and left, “Goodbye, teacher. I’m going to study hard.”
After running five laps, Lu Yinxi’s legs felt as heavy as lead, and her heart was pounding fiercely, as if she could hear the blood roaring through her veins.
The anger had already been vented. She strolled along the track for the final lap, sorting out her thoughts.
She glanced at Jian Qing, who had been neglected on the side, and wanted to walk over and arrogantly ask, “Do you realize your mistake? What did you do wrong?”
However, in reality, after the anger subsided, seeing that indifferent and aloof face was like a student who hadn’t done their homework facing the teacher, she couldn’t help but feel a wave of timidity.
It’s all because of that scoundrel. When she doesn’t speak or smile, there’s always a strong sense of oppression, forcing people to not dare to make eye contact with her.
Her intuition is too sharp, and her mind is as meticulous as a hair. She can silently see through someone completely.
Lu Yinxi recalled the night they first met: Jian Qing’s scrutinizing gaze, the forced questioning by grabbing her left hand, and the subtle probing.
On the first day she crossed over, she was already suspected by her.
Lu Yinxi wiped the sweat from her forehead. As the anger and grievance faded, rationality was restored, and she tried to put herself in the other’s shoes.
The symptoms that Jian Qing observed, such as sudden personality changes, memory loss, and childhood trauma, indeed match the manifestations of DID patients.
She is a doctor. Seeing those symptoms would only make her associate them with mental illnesses, not with ghosts or supernatural beings.
In the field of mental psychology, revealing past embarrassments to a doctor is like undressing for a physical examination. The patient may feel ashamed, but the doctor can only see the illness.
Whether or not trust is betrayed is entirely a subjective personal emotion.
From an objective standpoint, treating the illness is the most direct thought a doctor would have.
After some empathetic thinking, Lu Yinxi dragged her heavy steps, walking slowly towards the stands.
Jian Qing sat alone at the edge of the stands, looking down at her from a higher position.
(If you're not reading on littlepandatranslations.com, it means this has been stolen)
As she approached, she awkwardly raised her head, looking up at the person sitting there.
There was no longer any hostility in her eyes; they were clear and pure, like a spring. Sweat beads appeared on the tip of her nose, her cheeks were flushed, and her lips were slightly parted. If you got closer, you could hear faint sounds of her breathing.
Jian Qing stared at Lu Yinxi for a few seconds, lowered her eyes, tore open a wet tissue package, took out a tissue, brushed aside her stray hair, and wiped her sweat.
Forehead, cheeks, neck.
Lu Yinxi was used to being taken care of by her assistant, so she didn’t find anything amiss. She cooperatively lifted her head and twisted her neck, allowing Jian Qing to clean her thoroughly. She even proactively extended her hand, palm up, indicating that she wanted her to wipe the sweat from her palm as well.
This action took them both by surprise for a moment, and then their eyes met again.
Lu Yinxi recalled the night they first met, when Jian Qing wanted to help her clean the bloodstains on the back of her hand. She had strongly resisted and even squeezed the wound on Jian Qing’s left palm in return.
Now, however, she was willing to extend her hand and let her wipe it.
The body’s subconscious reaction was quite honest.
Lu Yinxi averted her gaze, a flush rising to her ears, but she didn’t retract her hand.
Jian Qing held her hand, carefully wiping each finger one by one, breaking the silence and taking the initiative to speak: “Have you calmed down?”
Lu Yinxi responded with a hum.
“This personality of yours, what profession are you in?”
Couldn’t hide it from her, Lu Yinxi answered honestly: “An actress.”
“Do you have an assistant to take care of your clothing, food, housing, and transportation?”
Lu Yinxi nodded again and responded with a hum, then realized: “Are you saying I’m pampered?”
It’s true that celebrities have assistants to take care of them, some even have everything done for them.
“I am a party member.” Lu Yinxi emphasized, blushing, “I don’t take anything from fans, and I personally handle anything I can. I only ask for help when I’m truly too busy, like wiping sweat, sometimes I’m just too tired to move…”
Jian Qing smiled.
A very light and faint smile, fleeting.
Lu Yinxi turned her head away, her face even redder.
The next second, she heard an apology that was reasonable yet unexpected.
“Sorry, Comrade Party Member, for taking you to see a doctor without asking your opinion.”
The embers of anger were completely extinguished by this quiet apology. Lu Yinxi looked at Jian Qing.
Jian Qing, while wiping her fingers, continued to explain: “I was worried that you would avoid seeing a doctor, so I took the initiative without consulting you. It was my lack of respect.”
This calm and peaceful attitude was one that Jian Qing only had when facing patients.
Lu Yinxi bit her lip and softly scolded her: “I’m not sick, don’t treat me like a patient.”
After a moment of silence, she lowered her head, looked at her toes, and couldn’t help but feel a bit sad.
This person doesn’t understand the real reason for my anger at all…
I trusted her and was willing to confide my past in her, but she betrayed that trust, betrayed that uniqueness, and still apologized earnestly, thinking it was her actions that lacked respect.
She doesn’t know that at some point, she became my only one.
But these feelings are hard to express directly. If spoken directly, they would be too full of resentment and entanglement, like complaining that a lover doesn’t understand one’s feelings.
They are not even considered lovers, not even necessarily friends.
Lu Yinxi couldn’t say it out loud, so she let out a heavy sigh.
Jian Qing was still looking at her, waiting for her response.
Not expecting this block of ice to understand, Lu Yinxi let out a gentle sigh, changed her usual gentle demeanor, and displayed a maturity beyond her appearance, speaking warmly, “Dr. Jian, you judged wrong. I had no trauma in my childhood. Although I was isolated and mocked for being left-handed, I retaliated against those who truly bullied me—
The one who tore up my workbook, I burned his with a lighter;
The one who stuffed caterpillars in my drawer, I dug up earthworms and caught non-venomous snakes from the vegetable field and stuffed them in her schoolbag;
If someone dared to hit me, I would hit back. After hitting them, I would go to the teacher to complain, then go to the fields, hold onto their mother’s leg, and cry my heart out, pretending I was terribly bullied. That way, everyone would side with me, and they would be punished by the teacher, and their mom would beat them until their butt was covered in welts…
I was indeed very timid. The first time I resisted, I was so scared that my whole body was shaking, and my voice was trembling. After those people left, I squatted on the ground and cried for a long time.
But I don’t need to develop another personality to protect me. I have never needed anyone’s protection. I can protect myself.”
As her words fell, her hand finished wiping.
Jian Qing said nothing, silently watching Lu Yinxi, as if looking at a stranger.
Lu Yinxi took the wet wipes from Jian Qing’s hand and ran towards the distant trash can.
Jian Qing watched her slender back and recalled that night in the countryside villa. It was she who got slapped and cut by a knife, yet Lu Yinxi, with red-rimmed eyes, shrank into the corner of the sofa, looking aggrieved and sad, and had the audacity to say, “Don’t bully me.”
So, she had been like this since childhood.
Jian Qing lowered her head and gently touched the scar on her left palm, smiling faintly.
(If you're not reading on littlepandatranslations.com, it means this has been stolen)
After throwing away the trash, Lu Yinxi jogged back. Jian Qing handed her a saline drink: “Rehydrate.”
Lu Yinxi gulped down a few mouthfuls, then grabbed Jian Qing’s left hand, lifted her sleeve, and examined the bite mark she had left, using the dim light.
The bite was deep but did not break the skin.
She breathed a sigh of relief.
In clinical settings, doctors are constantly exposed to occupational hazards and come into contact with patients carrying infectious diseases such as hepatitis B, HIV, and syphilis. As a clinical doctor, having an exposed wound on the body is extremely dangerous.
Jian Qing lifted the sleeve of her right hand, bringing her fair wrist close to Lu Yinxi’s lips, and said calmly, “If you’re still upset, you can continue biting.”
Lu Yinxi slapped away her right hand.
For the past two weeks, during work hours, she had been wearing medical gloves on her left hand to prevent occupational exposure. She didn’t know how the wound was healing.
Lu Yinxi let down her sleeve, covering the bite mark, and turned her attention to her palm.
The cut on her left palm had long since had the stitches removed, leaving an ugly scar about 5 cm long.
Lu Yinxi gently stroked the scar with the pad of her index finger and said, “Your life line and love line have both been cut by me. What does that signify?”
Could this mean that they are destined to be together?
A warm sensation and an unbearable itchiness emanated from her palm. Jian Qing withdrew her hand. “You can read fortunes?”
Lu Yinxi nodded, her eyes sparkling with a brilliant smile. “Yes, I can. I predicted that you will live a long life.”
She hoped that this person, who had taken on a villain’s role, would have a life filled with peace and joy, living to a ripe old age.
Jian Qing looked into her eyes, reached out, and made a rather improper gesture—pinching her chin.
“Be honest, who are you?”
