Life is Like a Journey – Chapter 69
by Little PandaVolume 2: Inheritance
Breaking Up
Zhiyou, let’s break up
Exhausted after surgery, Lu Qingshi dragged herself into the office: “Where’s Yu Gui? When will the patient records that need to be submitted be ready?”
Liu Qingyun stood up and handed her the organized content: “Sister Lu… she…”
“What about her?”
After hearing the explanation, Lu Qingshi slightly furrowed her brow: “Who can you blame if your skills aren’t up to par? It takes real talent to prick yourself.”
“It’s all my fault. I couldn’t find the vein. The situation was urgent, so Dr. Yu performed the central venous puncture,” the young nurse stood up, sobbing and filled with self-reproach.
“Where is she now?”
“Director Xu told her to go home and rest.”
Early in the morning, when Fang Zhiyou received Yu Gui’s call, the other end was crying uncontrollably. Fang Zhiyou leaped out of bed: “Xiaogui, what’s wrong? What happened? Don’t cry! Tell me slowly…”
Yu Gui choked with sobs. She didn’t know how to begin. HIV positive. After occupational exposure, there was a high chance of transmitting it to her. She couldn’t continue to be with Fang Zhiyou.
Why did it have to be this disease…
Why…
Yu Gui sat on the rooftop, covering her head and crying inconsolably. Tears fell one by one onto the floor.
Although Yu Gui was somewhat timid and often cried, it was rare for her to have such an emotional breakdown, crying hysterically.
Fang Zhiyou’s heart clenched: “Tell me, what exactly happened? Don’t be afraid, I’m here.”
Yu Gui looked at the small wound on her hand that had been bandaged, tears falling incessantly. The wind on the rooftop picked up, tousling her hair.
“Zhiyou, let’s break up.”
Fang Zhiyou gripped the phone tightly, a dull pain cutting through her heart: “Reason.”
Yu Gui choked: “No… no reason…”
After being together for ten years, this was the first time she had initiated a breakup. Hearing the suddenly quickened breathing on the other end, Yu Gui’s internal organs twisted in pain.
“I’ll give you one chance to take back what you just said. I’ll pretend nothing happened.”
Tears blurred her vision. The outlines of distant skyscrapers became hazy. Yu Gui’s hand rested on the cold railing, her heart as cold as the iron.
“When we got together, we made a promise. Do you remember?”
“I remember.”
It was late autumn ten years ago. The street was covered with fallen phoenix tree leaves, making a rustling sound under their feet. The street lamps emitted a soft glow. Later, whenever she recalled it, she would remember how bright the stars were that night, how beautiful the moonlight was.
Yu Gui asked with a blushing face: “Are you sure about this?”
She was answered with a careful kiss, as thin as a cicada’s wing, landing on her forehead, yet brushing across her heart like a feather, stirring sweet ripples.
“Mm-hmm.”
“Pinky promise, whoever changes is a puppy.” Two fingers tightly intertwined.
Fang Zhiyou hugged her: “From today on, you’re my girlfriend.”
At that time, with youthful hearts, they hadn’t considered how much this relationship would change them both, nor had they thought about the unpredictable future.
In Fang Zhiyou’s embrace, Yu Gui glimpsed a phoenix tree leaf falling from midair. Leaves return to their roots. At that moment, she felt she had found her root too.
“You’re not allowed to like anyone else. If you like someone else…”
“Then what?”
Yu Gui puffed up her cheeks: “Then we break up!”
Fang Zhiyou hooked her pinky finger, smiling: “The same goes for you. If one day you really like someone else, you have to tell me.”
“I’m sorry, I… I’ve fallen for someone else…”
Fang Zhiyou became agitated: “Bullshit! Yu Gui, tell me what happened?! No matter what it is, we’ll face it together…”
Yu Gui’s voice was faint, tinged with tears: “You can’t share this… Zhiyou… We really can’t be together anymore… It will hold you back…”
Yu Gui leaned on the railing, her eyes blurred with tears, her hand holding the phone trembling slightly. She dared not tell anyone that she was a potential AIDS patient. Her professional career was ruined in an instant. She couldn’t give the future she had once promised, nor could she stay with her. Even though the risk of transmission through female-female sexual contact was low, she knew that low risk didn’t mean no risk.
“What, ready to jump off already?” Startled by the voice behind her, Yu Gui’s whole body shook, losing three souls and seven spirits. Her wrist loosened, and the phone fell from the high-rise.
She instinctively reached out to catch it, but Lu Qingshi rushed forward in one swift move and grabbed her clothes: “Are you trying to throw your life away?!”
Coming to her senses, Yu Gui was drenched in sweat, collapsing onto the ground, her face a picture of despair. Infected with AIDS, lost her phone – could anything be worse than this?!
She thought, Lu Qingshi must have been sent by heaven to torment her.
The young woman before her no longer radiated vitality. Her eyes were red, her hair disheveled, her white coat wrinkled, without a name tag, and her sleeves stained with tears and mucus.
Lu Qingshi still extended her hand: “Get up.”
“What for?” At this moment, she truly had the impulse to jump off.
“Come with me to the Infectious Diseases Department.” Lu Qingshi pulled her up without further ado, dragging her by the sleeve down from the rooftop. She was tall with long strides, and Yu Gui followed step by step, accompanying her through the white corridors and the crowded outpatient hall.
She looked at the back of her head, hair tied up neatly, her gaze moving from her white coat to the armband identical to her own. Suddenly, she felt a heart-stirring strength from her thin figure, causing her eyes to moisten slightly.
This feeling was like an older sister leading a younger sister. The occasional gentleness displayed by Teacher Lu was a very reassuring presence for her.
Until she was pressed onto a chair in the Hematology Department: “Test her blood, liver function five items, and bring a 《Blood-borne Occupational Exposure Registration Form》.”
She was made to fill out the form while Lu Qingshi looked at her test results: “It’s just occupational exposure, why make such a fuss about life and death?”
Yu Gui sniffled: “I really wasn’t thinking about dying…”
“Then what were you doing on the rooftop?”
“Calling… calling my girl…” Lu Qingshi looked up slightly.
Yu Gui cowered, lacking the courage to come out in front of her. Her voice lowered: “Calling my partner.”
“Liver and kidney functions are normal. Let’s go with enhanced medication then. AZT and 3TC combination plus ritonavir twice daily, continue for twenty-eight days and then come back for initial screening.”
Coming out of the Infectious Diseases Department, Yu Gui held the medicine silently: “I don’t know if the prevention will be successful…”
“And you call yourself a doctor. Don’t you know that the best time for post-exposure prevention is within two hours?”
“I… I didn’t think that much at the time…”
Lu Qingshi turned to look at her: “Do you regret it? Saving that patient?”
Yu Gui thought for a moment, struggle visible in her eyes, but still shook her head firmly: “No regrets. If I hadn’t saved him, he would have died.”
“AIDS can kill too,” Lu Qingshi said flatly.
“It’s not the same,” Yu Gui clutched the medicine box tightly: “At least I won’t let a patient die before my eyes.”
Lu Qingshi made no comment and tossed the documents to her: “Report to the Medical Affairs Department yourself. You don’t need to come to work for this month.”
Earlier, Xu Qiankun had been ambiguous, implying that she didn’t need to come anymore. Yu Gui was a bit nervous: “Teacher Lu, in the future…”
“I’ll check your work in a month. If it’s not up to standard, you can pack your bags and leave.”
Lu Qingshi said flatly, leaving her standing alone, both bitter and joyful, sniffling.
“Thank you, Teacher Lu.”
Early the next morning, Qin Xuan made the bed and folded the clothes as usual. She took out his clothes and tidied them up. Her phone vibrated, and she took it out to see a message from a contact named “Hui” asking when he would be back.
Bao Fengnian came out after washing his face and snatched the phone from her hand: “Alright, I’m leaving. Call me if anything comes up.”
Qin Xuan raised an eyebrow: “Meeting a lover?”
“What are you saying? You’re my only lover, aren’t you?” He tried to lean in to kiss her cheek but was pushed away. He settled for patting her bottom, picked up his briefcase, peeked out the door, and seeing no one around, slipped into the elevator.
Qin Xuan looked at the empty room, suddenly feeling a bit empty.
“Patient, female, 17 years old, admitted to the emergency department for a knee injury, later diagnosed with late-stage bone cancer. Please share your thoughts freely.”
Dai Yuchen’s CT scan results were enlarged on the screen. The orthopedic professor pushed up his glasses and said: “Given the patient’s young age, we don’t recommend amputation. After consulting with our colleagues in oncology, we’ve proposed several chemotherapy options…”
Lu Qingshi sat quietly at the bottom, twirling a pen between her fingers.
A small table was placed on the hospital bed. The girl sat on the bed doing her homework. A soccer ball rested quietly at her bedside. Her mother walked in and handed her a warmed-up glass of milk: “Take a break, sweetie.”
Dai Yuchen bit on the straw, looking at the clear blue sky outside the window: “Why hasn’t Dad come to see me yet?”
Dai’s mother was organizing the clothes she had changed out of to take home for washing: “Your dad is busy with work. He’ll come to see you in a couple of days when he’s done.”
“Mom, what exactly is… my illness?”
Faced with her innocent inquiry, Dai’s mother felt a lump in her throat. With her back turned, her eyes reddened: “The doctor said… your knee is severely injured… You need to stay for a few more days…”
“But I really want to go out and play soccer…” Dai Yuchen tossed the empty milk carton into the trash can: “And there’s a mock exam coming up soon. I want to go back to school for classes.”
“You child, usually you don’t care much about studying, but now that we let you rest, you keep clamoring to go back to school…”
When it came to studying, the nagging mother was still the same nagging mother.
Dai Yuchen pouted, saying nothing.
“There’s still 18,000 yuan in arrears, pay it off as soon as possible.” They say gold is precious, but little do they know that there are many medicines more precious than gold. After paying the hospitalization fees and medical expenses, Dai’s mother counted the few remaining bills in her wallet as she walked to the end of the corridor to make a phone call.
“Do you have any more money? Transfer another 20,000 yuan to me. The doctor just prescribed some medicine today…”
The man, with a cigarette in his mouth, responded impatiently: “Didn’t I just transfer you 10,000? Why do you need money again? Besides, isn’t it covered by medical insurance?!”
“Even with medical insurance, you still need to pay upfront before getting reimbursed! Moreover, Yuchen’s chemotherapy drugs aren’t even covered. So Yuchen is just my daughter alone, is that it…”
“Alright, alright, I got it. I’ll come over to see her tomorrow and bring the money too,” the man said impatiently before hanging up the phone with a bang.
“Are you there?” The message was sent, and the reply came quickly: “What’s up?”
Fang Zhiyou hesitated for a moment before sending the typed message: “Is it possible to get this month’s salary in advance?”
“Sure, do you want game coins or RMB?”
Fang Zhiyou breathed a sigh of relief: “RMB.”
She sent over her account details, and the remittance notification came quickly. Fang Zhiyou expressed her sincere gratitude: “Thank you, Ruoshui.”
“You’re welcome. Going to Jinzhou again?” The other party sent a big smiley face to tease her.
“Mm… My girlfriend had a bit of an incident. I’m very worried about her.”
After spending time together for a while, although she didn’t know what kind of person was behind the network, she still had an instinctive trust. Just like when she asked for an advance on her salary, the other party transferred it without hesitation. It’s easy to add flowers to brocade, but hard to send charcoal in snowy weather. She would remember this kindness for a lifetime.
“Then go quickly. Let me know if you need anything. I’ll lend to you first.”
Fang Zhiyou packed a few clothes into her bag, took out all the money from her piggy bank, about a few hundred yuan. She left half of it in the living room for her mother, along with a note, and asked the neighbors to check in more often while she was away. After doing all this, she boarded the bus to the train station.
Because the optimal prevention time had passed, the drug dosage prescribed by Lu Qingshi was very high, and the side effects were relatively obvious.
Just on the first day of medication, she started losing hair in clumps. She had seen how chemotherapy patients went from having thick, black hair to completely bald, and an intangible fear tightly gripped her heart.
Next came the fatigue and nausea. She read for a while before falling into a daze. When she woke up retching over the toilet, there was a knock at the door.
Yu Gui stumbled over to open the door, only to be embraced: “Xiaogui…”
A mix of immense joy and fear crept up her heart. Yu Gui pushed her away forcefully: “Go away! Stay away from me! Don’t come near!”
As she said this, she shrank back, knocking over a chair in the room. Water spilled all over the table.
Fang Zhiyou, carrying fruit in her hand, closed the door and walked towards her step by step: “I went to the hospital, talked to your mentor. I… know everything now.”
Whether it was due to the medication or something else, her emotions had never been so hysterical before. Yu Gui grabbed a pillow and threw it at her: “Get out! I already said we’re breaking up! Why did you come?!!!”
“I don’t agree!!!” Fang Zhiyou shouted back at her. They looked at each other’s tear-stained, miserable faces.
“Why is it that when we fall in love, both parties need to agree, but when breaking up, only one person’s agreement is enough? Yu Gui, this is so unfair to me.”
Yu Gui trembled, burying her head in her knees: “Don’t come near… Just go… I… I’m sick… I’ll infect you…”
Fang Zhiyou looked around her dormitory, which was no more than ten square meters and resembled a storage room. Books were piled everywhere, a table made of stacked suitcases, surgical knots tied all over the iron frame bed, the mixed smell of instant noodles and miscellaneous items. How had her Xiaogui spent half a year here?
Just thinking about it made her heart ache to the point of suffocation. When she hugged her, she could clearly feel the bones beneath her skin.
Fang Zhiyou stroked her head, tears falling on her hair: “I’m not afraid. Then infect me if you must.”
At first, Yu Gui still tried to push her away, but gradually she lost strength, clutching her clothes and sobbing loudly.
Fang Zhiyou wiped her tears: “It’s okay, it’s okay, don’t cry. No matter what happens, I’ll be with you.”
As dusk fell, the last rays of the setting sun shone through the only window, bathing them in its glow. Yu Gui lay in her arms, falling into a deep sleep, her fingers still hooked onto Fang Zhiyou’s clothes.
She only moved her arm slightly, and the person in her arms suddenly woke up, eyes opening with tears.
“Zhiyou… Don’t go!”
Fang Zhiyou leaned down and pressed a kiss to her forehead: “I’m not going anywhere. I’m staying here with you.”
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