Alone, Beautifully – Chapter 159

by Little Panda

A Story About Happiness (6)

“I miss you”

Xu Jiao and Xia Jingzhe, after their playful bickering, eventually rolled onto the couch and fell asleep.

With her eyes closed, even in deep sleep she still tightly gripped her hand. Actually, she wasn’t the one lacking security, but she wanted to reassure Xia Jingzhe, tell her that she would always be there, so unconsciously their body heat became wrapped together as one.

As a result, in the middle of the night, Xu Jiao was awakened by the cold.

In her drowsy state, she thought that even if Xia Jingzhe’s cultivation technique wasn’t immortal cultivation, it shouldn’t be this cold.

Her fingertips unconsciously felt around beside her, and Xu Jiao belatedly realized that the hand she had been holding tightly was withdrawn by her at some unknown time, and the firm couch beneath her had somehow changed into a soft, easily edge-felt mattress.

The person who should be beside her pillow wasn’t within her reach.

Xu Jiao suddenly woke up as if from a nightmare!

When she opened her eyes, she noticed the light around was dim, and before realizing it was dark, she first saw the ceiling within her field of vision.

Her eyes stared blankly at the ceiling and those modern-style fluorescent tube lights for a while, and after a long time, Xu Jiao finally came to her senses, slowly moving her gaze to look at the furnishings beside her—

She was now lying on the edge of a roughly 1.5-meter bed, covered with a thin mat, her hands and feet exposed, and because there was a draft [cross-ventilation] in the room, it caused her hands and feet to become somewhat cold.

Next to the bed was a small nightstand, and about half a meter away from the bed was a crowded assembled wardrobe [flat-pack wardrobe], its door half-open, revealing neatly folded clothes inside.

These furnishings looked far too familiar.

As Xu Jiao recalled, confusion rose from the depths of her heart:

Where was Xia Jingzhe?

If she suddenly left like this, would Xia Jingzhe think she broke her promise? If she just disappeared like this, perhaps Xia Jingzhe would go crazy?

But quickly, she shook her head, casting away those emerging thoughts.

No, that’s not right.

She had originally been staying with Ye Zhen, and only saw Xia Jingzhe after falling asleep and entering that world. She hadn’t even figured out if this was all a dream or a second transmigration, so it wasn’t her turn to worry about this or that.

Xu Jiao lifted the thin blanket and sat up, rearranging the small blanket over herself differently, covering her curled-up hands and feet. As she sat quietly in the room, with slow and methodical movements, she remembered why this rental room was familiar.

This was the place where she had lived when she was dating Shen Yelan.

Ah, Shen Yelan.

Xu Jiao carefully savored this name in her heart.

The first scene that jumped out from her memories was that heavy rain, which seemed capable of submerging the entire city, falling endlessly throughout the night, washing away the deep blood-red that had been on the ground until nothing remained.

Xu Jiao silently pulled the mat up to her shoulders, feeling even colder than before.

Not from the room’s temperature.

But from her own attitude towards Shen Yelan back then.

She slowly exhaled a breath, still pondering about Shen Yelan, when she heard the sound of the living room door opening. Xu Jiao sat in the room without moving or making a sound, just quietly staring in the direction of the bedroom doorway.

“Shen Yelan, where did you go? I’ve been looking for you for a long time.”

The Xu Jiao in front of her sat on the ground rubbing her eyes, truly looking as if she had been waiting for a long time, her expression even carrying a hint of pitiful vulnerability. As Shen Yelan looked at this beautiful face showing a touch of fragility, two voices seemed to be having a tug-of-war in her mind:

“Don’t trust her, don’t you understand what the real Xu Jiao is like?”

“Perhaps, Sister Xu Jiao has really started to like you?”

She wavered, hesitating for a long time, but still opened her arms to the person. However, just as her hand reached out, at the moment of touching the other person, the figure before her vanished.

Shen Yelan grabbed at empty air, hearing a malicious and mocking voice appear beside her ear: “Why are you always so stupid? You’ve been deceived so many times but never learn your lesson. Whether it’s the real person or your hallucinations, you fall for it time and time again.”

“Or could it be… that you actually enjoy when we wear Xu Jiao’s skin [clone/double] to do things she would never do, like depending on you so deeply, and then you can feel self-satisfied just by watching?”

Shen Yelan’s entire body froze.

It wasn’t really like that.

But she couldn’t say anything at all, and after being stifled for a long time, she finally spoke in a low voice, unable to bear it any longer:

“Shut up!”

Just as the words fell—

The bedroom light was suddenly switched on by someone, soft white light pouring out from the room, clearly illuminating Shen Yelan at the doorway as she maintained her posture of bending down to help someone up. She hadn’t reacted at all, reflexively moving her shoulders, shifting to the other side to avoid the light.

Xu Jiao saw her reaction clearly.

Because this time she woke up earlier than before.

So she could see clearly everything she hadn’t understood last time, and the truth that Shen Yelan had tried to conceal.

Shen Yelan was talking to thin air.

She seemed to be experiencing severe hallucinations.

And Xu Jiao…

Knew nothing about it at all.

Or rather, she had once touched the edges of the truth, but because of impatience and indifference, she had let the truth slip through her fingers like flowing sand, until Shen Yelan’s death finally made her face this person, and the tragedy that had occurred to them.

Xu Jiao moved her lips, wanting to say something.

However, her lips were trembling.

After Shen Yelan adjusted to the light in front of her, she stood up straight, saw Xu Jiao’s shadow in the lamplight, confirmed this person was real, and pretending nothing had happened, smiled at Xu Jiao, waved the takeout dinner in her hand, and asked softly:

“…Would you like dinner?”

Xu Jiao remained motionless, only her gaze fixed steadily on her face, looking at this face that was identical to Ye Zhen’s, a shell that actually contained Ye Zhen’s soul, tears unconsciously seeping into her eyes, whether from looking too long or something else.

She had too many things she wanted to say.

Wanted to apologize to Shen Yelan.

Wanted to explain to her.

But in the end, seeing Shen Yelan’s slightly awkward appearance, she just stepped forward, took the initiative to raise her arms and embrace the other’s neck, burying her face in that neck, and called out very softly:

“Shen Yelan.”

Shen Yelan stiffened at her embrace, not knowing where to put her hands, or whether she should drop the takeout bag, responding to her in flustered movements:

“Mm… mm?”

Xu Jiao hugged her even tighter, closed her eyes, and said in a somewhat hoarse voice:

“I…”

“I kind of miss you.”

Shen Yelan: “?!”

She stood there stunned, as if struck by lightning.

One thought filled her entire mind:

It’s over.

Her illness seems to have gotten worse.

This time, even the touch, breathing, and temperature felt so real.

If it weren’t for the fact that she knew Xu Jiao would never act spoiled like this, she would have almost believed it.