Volume Seven: The Years I Was a General
To Regret, To Grieve
Empress Xianren is not Xiao Chuyu’s biological mother?!
Everyone was aghast, all looking at Wen Nuan in disbelief.
Ye Mingxiu cried out involuntarily: “Gu Wen Nuan, what reckless-and-wild-talk1 are you saying?”
Who did not know that Xiao Chuyu was the child Empress Xianren had carried for ten months and given birth to, and that as soon as Xiao Chuyu was born, she was enfeoffed by Emperor Chongming as the Crown Princess of Ming’an Kingdom.
Wen Nuan looked at the endlessly panicked Xiao Chuyu, a flash of guilt in her eyes, and said with difficulty: “I’m sorry, it was my fault for making you sad by killing Empress Xianren back then, but… I had no choice but to kill Empress Xianren.”
“Don’t say any more!” Xiao Chuyu covered her ears, her eyes crimson as she glared at Wen Nuan.
She roared in a hoarse voice, “Zhen doesn’t want to listen—”
“You shut up! You shut up, ah!”
As long as she couldn’t hear Wen Nuan’s words, she could pretend that she didn’t know anything.
She was afraid that the truth Gu Wen Nuan spoke of would be too cruel, that she truly would have no way to bear it.
She would completely collapse.
“Gu Wen Nuan, you’ve gone mad.” Ye Mingxiu looked in alarm as Gu Wen Nuan brought up the most painful part of Xiao Chuyu’s past, which was undoubtedly intensifying Xiao Chuyu’s killing intent toward Gu Wen Nuan.
He tried his utmost to stop Wen Nuan’s courting death behavior, “Gu Wen Nuan, some words should be spoken with caution!”
Wen Nuan lowered her eyes, looking at the dazed Su Hong, her tone devoid of any ripples: “Whether you believe it or not, Xiao Chuyu will not be going to hell to accompany you. She will live well, for a long, long time, and you can just suffer nicely in hell.”
She looked at the imperial guards and said in a deep voice: “Take her away!”
The imperial guards dragged the dazed and crestfallen Su Hong away. Only she, Ye Mingxiu, and Xiao Chuyu were left in the Zunling Hall. The three of them fell into an endless silence. No one spoke. In the thick and oppressive atmosphere, the sound of heavy breathing revealed Xiao Chuyu’s agitation and unease.
Wen Nuan glanced at the silent, head-lowered Xiao Chuyu. She knew she was evading, she was afraid.
“Ye Mingxiu, do me a favor.”
Ye Mingxiu’s brow furrowed: “What is it?”
“Go and invite Consort Yun from the Qinglong Temple here.”
“Why bring Consort Yun here?” Ye Mingxiu was puzzled, but when he saw the look Wen Nuan gave him, he immediately understood.
He cried out involuntarily: “You’re saying… Consort Yun is….”
Ye Mingxiu couldn’t help but look at Xiao Chuyu, who had curled herself up. His eyes were full of suspicion and shock.
Wen Nuan closed her eyes and sighed with a weary heart: “Go on, the Heart-Bewitching Gu in Xiao Chuyu’s body must be removed.”
Ye Mingxiu opened his mouth, but didn’t know what to say. He could only let out a long sigh and turn to leave.
Wen Nuan squatted in front of Xiao Chuyu. Seeing her flustered and bewildered expression, her eyes filled with panic and helplessness, she was like a newborn cub, surrounded by unease and fear.
This was the second time she had seen such a fragile and helpless Xiao Chuyu. The last time was three years ago in Hezheng Hall2, when she had personally exposed Xiao Chuyu’s true identity, and she had looked at her in just the same way.
And she hadn’t given her one last look.
“Chuchu…” Wen Nuan raised her hand, wanting to stroke Xiao Chuyu’s head.
But she dodged her touch in a panic.
A trace of disappointment flashed in Wen Nuan’s eyes, her hand frozen in mid-air, neither up nor down.
Her awkward smile was tinged with guilt as she said powerlessly: “…I’m sorry, Chuchu.”
I have brought you so much harm.
Xiao Chuyu’s expression was momentarily at a loss, her face a faint white, and she said in a hoarse voice: “Just how many… more things are you still hiding from me?”
Wen Nuan’s expression went blank for a moment. She bit her lip: “No… there are no more.”
After this matter with Su Hong was over, there would be no more obstacles or secrets between them.
“Is that so?” Xiao Chuyu raised her head, looking at Wen Nuan with a resolute expression, “Gu Wen Nuan, you said I should believe you, but you’ve hidden so many things from me. How do you expect me to believe you?”
Wen Nuan was speechless, unable to explain.
“Using the excuse of it being for my own good, you’ve done so many things behind my back. I’m afraid that what I know now is just the tip of the iceberg of all the things you’ve done for me.”
“On what grounds did you do these things for me? On what grounds did you do them and not tell me? On what grounds did you deliberately hide these things to force me to hate you?”
A thin layer of sorrow surfaced in Xiao Chuyu’s eyes. Her expression was bewildered yet serious, as she finally cried out all the questions in her heart.
“Why did you expose my true identity? Why did you punish me in the Imperial Prison? Why did you kill my Mother Empress with your own hands? Why, when I hated you to the bone, did you then tell me that my Mother Empress was not my biological mother at all? Why did you give me a sliver of life when Su Hong was killing me?”
“Gu Wen Nuan, you tell me, why? What was all of this for?”
Xiao Chuyu screamed herself hoarse, every cry filled with heartache and resentment. She was desperate and helpless, sorrowful and aggrieved.
She cried her heart out before Wen Nuan like a child, as if to cry out all the sorrow that had been suppressed in her heart for so long.
Tears moistened Wen Nuan’s eyes, and her voice trembled: “…I’m sorry, Chuchu.”
She loved her, but she did not believe in her love.
She had brought it upon myself, she would reap what I have sown.
“I’m sorry, I’m sorry, it’s ‘I’m sorry’ again…” Xiao Chuyu cried out, slapping Wen Nuan fiercely across the face, “I don’t want your apology, Gu Wen Nuan! Besides saying sorry, do you have nothing else to say to me?”
Wen Nuan’s head was knocked to the side by the blow. The pain on her face was nothing compared to the pain rising in her heart.
Tears flowed silently from Xiao Chuyu’s eyes. She was already exhausted, unable to cry out another sound, and could only look at Wen Nuan, broken.
In the end, Xiao Chuyu did not get an answer from Wen Nuan. Because her emotions were overly agitated, it triggered the Heart-Bewitching Gu in her body, and she fainted from the unbearable pain.
Ye Mingxiu invited Consort Yun to the Imperial Mausoleum. He didn’t say much to Consort Yun; after all, his own mind was also in chaos.
Consort Yun walked into the room and saw Xiao Chuyu lying on the bed, her face deathly pale. Her pupils trembled, and she asked in a panic: “What’s wrong with The Emperor?”
Wen Nuan cut to the chase, “Su Hong placed a Heart-Bewitching Gu in The Emperor. The heart’s-blood of a close relative is needed to cure this Gu poison.”
Consort Yun was greatly alarmed. She immediately replied: “Fine, I can do it.”
Seeing Consort Yun’s attitude so decisive and firm, the doubt in Ye Mingxiu’s heart gradually dissipated. So Consort Yun really was Xiao Chuyu’s biological mother, otherwise she wouldn’t be so certain that her heart’s-blood could save Xiao Chuyu.
“I will use internal force to stabilize your life pulse3 to draw your heart’s-blood. You will not be in any mortal danger, please rest assured,” Wen Nuan looked at Ye Mingxiu, pulling out a dagger and giving it to him, “You stand guard4. When the Heart-Bewitching Gu is lured out, kill it immediately.”
Ye Mingxiu took the dagger and said seriously: “Alright.”
Wen Nuan looked at Consort Yun and said in a deep voice: “Let’s begin.”
Consort Yun looked at Xiao Chuyu with great heartache, and said with a choke in her voice: “Alright.”
The daylight was faintly cool when the tightly shut doors of the room finally opened slowly.
Ye Mingxiu picked up Consort Yun, who had fainted from blood loss, to find a doctor to treat her wounds, leaving only Wen Nuan behind to take care of Xiao Chuyu.
Now that the Heart-Bewitching Gu was removed, Xiao Chuyu’s life was no longer in any danger. She would not perish at the age of fifty as she did in the original plot.
In the original plot, Ye Mingxiu discovered that something was wrong with Xiao Chuyu and specially sought out famous doctors from all under heaven to treat her, thus discovering the Heart-Bewitching Gu in her body. The two methods given by the famous doctors were exactly the same as the methods given by Su Hong, but at that time they thought Empress Xianren and Emperor Chongming had long since passed away, making it impossible to use the second method to save Xiao Chuyu.
With no other choice, Ye Mingxiu went to Gu Mountain and used half his life to capture the King of Ten Thousand Gu to remove the Heart-Bewitching Gu for Xiao Chuyu. Although the Heart-Bewitching Gu was removed, Xiao Chuyu could only live to the age of fifty before she perished.
Wen Nuan wiped the sweat from Xiao Chuyu’s forehead, “I’ve made you suffer.”
Xiao Chuyu’s brows were tightly furrowed, as if she were trapped in a nightmare, in great pain.
Wen Nuan raised her hand to smooth her wrinkled brow, comforting her softly: “Chuchu, don’t be afraid, I’m here with you.”
Her expression gradually calmed, and Xiao Chuyu unconsciously grabbed Wen Nuan’s hand, holding it as tightly as a life-saving straw, squeezing Wen Nuan’s hand until it turned white.
Wen Nuan let her grab and squeeze it.
【Ai, what a mess this has turned into.】 The System sighed at length, 【Actually, what the female lead said is right. You did so many things without telling her. Although it was all for her own good, it creates a sense of burden and pressure. It’s natural that the female lead would collapse now that she knows the truth.】
Wen Nuan pressed her lips together: “…It’s my fault.”
【I’m not blaming you either. After all, we didn’t expect the points to be frozen, the female lead to blacken, and that we would return to the source world to meet them again. Back then, you flattened all obstacles for the female lead. The intention was good, it’s just that the result was unsatisfactory.】
In order to cure the female lead’s Heart-Bewitching Gu, Wen Nuan had even specifically left a letter for Consort Yun before she left, telling her to enter the palace to help her detoxify after Xiao Chuyu’s birthday had passed.
Now, the System could only lament that this was all too absurd.
【Don’t be too sad, at least the female lead’s blackening value has completely dropped,】 the System looked at the data console, 【Right now, the female lead’s blackening value is already 3.2!】
Wen Nuan naturally knew that Xiao Chuyu’s blackening value would decrease because of this, it was just that the process was too difficult and torturous.
“Tongzi, I’ve really done too many things wrong, causing ‘her’ to be hurt by me again and again.”
Whether it was the previous six worlds or the subsequent three worlds, Wen Nuan had done too many things that caused ‘her’ injury and pain.
She originally thought it was all for their own good, but in the end, she was just a leaping-beam clown5 who was self-satisfied and self-congratulatory.
How ridiculous.
Seeing Wen Nuan’s eyes redden, the System advised: 【It’s not all your fault. Who could have expected things to develop in such an extreme direction?】
Who could have expected that the female lead of every world would develop such deep and heavy feelings for Wen Nuan?
Wen Nuan felt the burning in her chest intensify. That heat seared her eyes until they ached, and tears slid down silently.
“Tongzi, I’ve really done too much wrong, far too much.”
The damage was already done. All she could do, besides trying her best to make up for it, was to endlessly repent and beg for forgiveness.
The System pleaded in a low voice: 【Wen Nuan, don’t cry, okay…】
It understood Wen Nuan’s feelings at this moment, but seeing Wen Nuan crying her eyes out, its own heart also felt extremely pained.
It had never seen such a sad and pained Wen Nuan. They had worked together for so long, experienced a hundred mission worlds together, they had witnessed too many sorrows and joys, partings and reunions, love and hate, but no one had ever been able to make Wen Nuan’s heart feel as if a knife were being twisted in it.
Before, it had thought that what Wen Nuan felt for ‘her’ was just love, just possessiveness, just an unwillingness to be separated. Now, it could be certain of ‘her’ importance to Wen Nuan.
She was Wen Nuan’s life, she was the “warmth” that Wen Nuan bitterly pursued.
They were torturing each other, but they were also saving each other.
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