STT – Chapter 50

Love is originally a bubble. If one can see through it, what’s the difficulty in being sad?

The driver followed Xu Baihan’s instructions and, slightly surprised, turned the car around at the intersection not far away to head back.

On that journey, Xu Baihan had her hands tightly clasped at her chest, her teeth clenched tightly, suppressing the impulse to shake all over from anticipation and nervousness…

That year, Yun Bo said she believed she wouldn’t let her wait in vain.

And now, should she also have the courage to believe that Yun Bo, who once loved her so deeply, wouldn’t really bear to let her wait in vain?

When they arrived at the hospital entrance, the driver got out to open the door, and as soon as he helped her off the car and onto the wheelchair, Xu Baihan impatiently turned the wheels, rushing into the rain and into the hospital. She didn’t even wait for the driver to open the umbrella for her, lock the car, and catch up; she had already disappeared into the misty fine rain…

She brought with her all the courage and expectation she could muster, not willing to stay a moment longer, and hurried to Yun Bo’s office. But what greeted her was only a tightly closed white wooden door and a strip of darkness beneath it, silently declaring her self-delusion.

A passing nurse asked her curiously, “Are you looking for Doctor Jiang? Doctor Jiang left long ago after finishing work.”

Xu Baihan forced out a faint smile, softly thanked her for the kind reminder, and pretended as if nothing had happened, turning her wheelchair one step at a time, slowly moving away…

In the rough, dull sound of the wheelchair’s friction, she softly asked herself, “Xu Baihan, would it be good to go back? You can’t hold on anymore, can you?”

But, no matter what, she found she couldn’t utter that single word, “good”…

Finally, she came once more to the hospital’s main entrance, but her hands holding the wheelchair couldn’t muster any strength. She looked at the distant, dim lights and vague human shadows, closed her eyes, as if she could see the next moment, her Yun Bo, just like back then, holding a delicate little umbrella, smiling as she walked toward her…

She released her grip on the wheelchair, folded her hands on her legs, sitting upright in the wheelchair, her gentle, water-like eyes fixed firmly ahead, her expression suddenly calm and assured…

The driver in the car saw Xu Baihan and quickly opened the car door, hurriedly running to her side, noticing her slightly damp, disheveled hair and already half-wet clothes. He worriedly said, “Miss, aren’t you going home? Your clothes are wet, and the wind is strong here…”

Xu Baihan gently shook her head, warmly refusing, “Uncle Zhao, it’s alright.” She paused slightly, pondered for a moment, and then considerately added, “Uncle Zhao, you’ve been with me since the afternoon, waiting until now, and probably haven’t eaten yet. I want to wait here a while; you should go eat first and come back to pick me up later.”

The old driver, who had watched Xu Baihan grow up, naturally had some affection for her and couldn’t remain aloof. Somewhat anxiously, he said, “Uncle Zhao isn’t hungry, Miss. You haven’t eaten anything since you asked me to take you to buy ingredients at noon. Let Uncle Zhao go and get you something to eat, okay?” As he spoke, he was about to take off his coat for Xu Baihan, but she reached out, grabbed his arm, shook her head, and gently said, “Uncle Zhao, no need. I’m not cold, but I am a bit hungry. You go eat, and when you come back, just bring me anything to eat.”

The driver couldn’t persuade Xu Baihan, so in the end, he had to leave, looking back every few steps.

After Jiang Wang got out of Li Liwen’s car, she walked a stretch with an umbrella, struggling with her thoughts several times, but ultimately took a cab back to the hospital.

Just like back then, when Xu Baihan’s birthday was approaching and she never mentioned whether she would come to see her, yet she was so certain that Xu Baihan would definitely come, waiting day and night at the bus station. And now, she also doesn’t know where her certainty comes from, believing that Xu Baihan is definitely waiting for her at the hospital.

Is it true that people in love really have a telepathic connection?

But she and Xu Baihan, do they really count as being in love?

Heh…

The night was too deep, and the fine rain too hazy, with an umbrella held up, blocking Jiang Wang’s vision, so that when she arrived at the hospital entrance, opened the car door, and stepped out halfway, she suddenly saw Xu Baihan sitting straight in a wheelchair at the hospital entrance. Reflexively, she withdrew back into the car, carelessly hitting her elbow on the car door, making a loud sound, and nearly cried out in pain.

The taxi driver, surprised, turned his head to look at the strangely behaving Jiang Wang. Holding her arm and unfazed by the driver’s curiosity, Jiang Wang inhaled, pondered slightly, and instructed, “Please turn around to the street corner ahead; I’ll get off there.”

The driver, though puzzled, turned the car around.

At the street corner, Jiang Wang paid and calmly got out of the car. With one hand in her coat pocket and the other holding an umbrella, she stood motionless at the busy street corner, quietly gazing at the distant figure sitting straight.

The distance was too great; she could only see Xu Baihan’s stubborn outline. Yet, with every blink of her eyes, before her, Xu Baihan’s image appeared so clearly, biting her lip, her eyes lowered, with a calm, serene, yet extremely stubborn and proud expression.

Jiang Wang suddenly couldn’t help but laugh. She laughed at Xu Baihan, wondering who gave her the courage and confidence to believe and be so sure that she wouldn’t be left at ease and would turn back?

She also laughed at herself, Yun Bo, do you want to die again?

The rain fell heavier and heavier, and time passed second by second. At the hospital entrance, Xu Baihan still maintained that straight and stubborn posture. Jiang Wang stood too far away to see Xu Baihan unconsciously shivering in the wind. At the street corner, Jiang Wang stood holding an umbrella, her distant gaze unchanging.

She didn’t know if Xu Baihan’s heart had started to waver, but as she looked at Xu Baihan’s thin and frail figure standing alone in the cold night, she heard the sound of the ice in her heart slowly melting…

From the afternoon until now, had she eaten? Was she hungry? As night deepened and the weather grew cold, she was dressed so thinly; could she bear it? Her… her legs, in such dampness, would they faintly ache?

Jiang Wang’s lips were tightly pressed into a line, pale without a trace of blood. She was gambling with Xu Baihan, or perhaps, gambling with life and fate again. She bet, after all, whether Xu Baihan or she was more stubborn, who had more patience, who would surrender earlier, or who cared more…

A black car quickly drove past Jiang Wang from the corner, splashing water onto her pant legs, but Jiang Wang didn’t move at all, her eyes still fixedly gazing into the distance.

That car appeared again in Jiang Wang’s view. The car steadily stopped at the hospital entrance, and a tall and upright man, holding an umbrella, got out of the car, quickly ran a few steps in front of Xu Baihan.

Jiang Wang only saw him slightly bend over, say something to Xu Baihan, then take off his coat and drape it over her. Xu Baihan reached out to hug his waist, burying her face in his abdomen. After a moment, Xu Baihan let go of him, lowered her head, and let that person push her into the car to leave…

Jiang Wang watched expressionlessly all along until she saw that car quickly drive past her again, splashing water, wetting her pant legs. Only then did she lower her head, looking at the muddy wetness on her pants, slowly, coldly beginning to laugh, slowly, slowly laughing out loud, bending over with laughter, tears streaming…

She ultimately lost again.

The rain continued to fall.

Jiang Wang straightened her body, her five fingers tightly clenched around the umbrella handle, her knuckles turning blue. She faintly lowered her eyes, expressionless, turned around, stepping heavily and steadily in the rainwater, rustling, solitary and alone…

Just keep walking like this, Yun Bo, just like this, do not turn back, do not…

Lu Zizheng and Jiang Huaixi shared a pillow. Lu Zizheng, looking at Jiang Huaixi’s clear and cold face close at hand, hesitated for a long while, then suddenly spoke with some regret, “Huaixi, last night… I’m sorry, I was too impulsive…”

Jiang Huaixi’s expression, slightly tinged with a smile, stiffened a bit. She gazed at Lu Zizheng, her brows slightly furrowed, and after a moment, she coldly and indifferently countered, “So, do you regret it?”

Lu Zizheng, seeing Jiang Huaixi’s noticeably cooling expression, blinked and reached out to hug Jiang Huaixi, shaking her head, “How could I? Huaixi, this is the best thing I’ve done in my life, and I do not regret it in this life.” She noticed Jiang Huaixi’s slightly eased expression, paused, and then murmured softly, “I just fear I wronged you.”

Jiang Huaixi quietly looked at Lu Zizheng, meeting Lu Zizheng’s gentle gaze directly, and quietly awaited her continuation.

Lu Zizheng hesitated slightly, bit her lip, and slightly lowered her eyes, finally voicing the unease that had lingered in her heart since waking up at midnight: “Huaixi, before, you were unwilling to accept me, yet yesterday, you did not refuse me.”

She asked, “Huaixi, do you accept me truly because of love, or because of sympathy?”

As soon as the words were spoken, the light before Lu Zizheng’s eyes suddenly dimmed as Jiang Huaixi, propping herself up with one hand, leaned over and sealed her lips with a kiss.

Jiang Huaixi’s brows and eyes were clear and cold, sober, her voice coldly indifferent, yet Lu Zizheng heard tenderness and sincerity within that cold voice, her heart slowly immersing in this unique gentleness.

Jiang Huaixi gently kissed her lips and softly asked her, “Zizheng, would I kiss the lips of someone I do not love out of sympathy?”

She gently kissed Lu Zizheng’s neck and softly asked her, “Zizheng, would I develop * for someone I do not love out of sympathy?”

She continued downward, her pearly teeth lightly parting to bite on Lu Zizheng’s delicate collarbone, gently grinding and licking, questioning her, “Would I be willing to commit to someone I do not love out of sympathy?”

She lifted her head and gazed at Lu Zizheng with a cold smile, “Zizheng, I’ve long said that, compared to settling, I am more willing to waste. You don’t need to think of me as too noble. I, Jiang Huaixi, am not some virtuous person, and I do not have such noble sympathy that would make me willing to wrong myself.”

Lu Zizheng looked up at Jiang Huaixi and saw her slightly displeased appearance, gently laughing. She blinked her eyes, with a satisfied smile at the corner of her mouth, slightly pushed down with both hands, flipped over, and pushed Jiang Huaixi onto the bed.

She lowered her head, kissed Jiang Huaixi’s forehead, and softly admitted her mistake, “Huaixi, I trust you; it was my doubt.” She straightened up, gazed at Jiang Huaixi, and seriously asked her, word by word, “So, Huaixi, let’s date.”

Jiang Huaixi’s eyes did not blink as she looked at the smiling Lu Zizheng in front of her, slightly surprised, her pupils slightly contracted for a moment, her heart unexpectedly racing, nervously biting her lips unconsciously.

Lu Zizheng reached back, as if performing magic, and produced two pure black rings woven with fine thread, presenting them before Jiang Huaixi, “Huaixi, I was unprepared, woke up in the middle of the night unable to sleep, and in the dark, I used my hair and your hair to weave these two rings. I use them as proof, hoping we can, as the ancients said, join hair as husband and wife, love and trust without doubt. Huaixi, are you willing to be my girlfriend?”

Jiang Huaixi also sat up, her refined face showing no emotion as she seriously gazed at Lu Zizheng and those two distinctive rings. After a moment, she gently smiled, her brows and eyes clear and cold, yet with a unique charm: “Not good.”

Lu Zizheng’s face changed, her smile slightly froze.

Jiang Huaixi’s faint smile spread, gradually deepening: “Zizheng, I thought that such a thing should be done by me, as the ‘attack lord,’ how could you get ahead of me?”

Lu Zizheng opened her mouth, finding herself speechless for a moment. She unconsciously lightly turned her still sore wrist, about to argue something, but saw Jiang Huaixi knowingly raise her eyebrows with a hint of warning. Lu Zizheng bit her lip, softened, and said, “Huaixi, then are you willing to let me be your girlfriend?”

Jiang Huaixi looked at Lu Zizheng’s somewhat aggrieved yet somewhat nervous appearance, finally bent her brows and eyes, with a smile at the corner of her lips, replied: “I am willing.”

She extended her hand, watching Lu Zizheng somewhat nervously slide the ring onto her own ring finger. Then she took the other one, bit by bit, slowly pushed it onto Lu Zizheng’s ring finger, curling her lips with a full smile: “Zizheng, as the ‘attack lord,’ I will definitely make you happy in the future.” A double entendre.

Lu Zizheng’s hand slightly trembled, and she looked up at the clearly joyful Jiang Huaixi, softly asking in puzzlement: “Huaixi, why must you be the ‘attack lord’?”

Jiang Huaixi extended both hands, pulling Lu Zizheng tightly into her embrace, with her chin resting on Lu Zizheng’s shoulder, softly whispering in her ear: “Fool, because the ‘attack lord’ must always pamper the ‘receive lord,’ protect her, and love her.”

LP: Re-translated on September 10, 2024