Novel Turned Yuri – Chapter 92

That is definitely not a lie

Today’s journey home was walked together by the two people.

While Qiao Yu went back to the school to find the teacher to retrieve her confiscated phone, she managed to persuade the security guard to let Lin Qing and her enter the school together, but they did not stay long inside. They quickly set off on the journey home.

Without taking a bus, Qiao Yu chatted with Lin Qing in a relaxed tone about some interesting learning incidents all the way, completely avoiding any mention of what just happened. Lin Qing spoke very little, mostly just smiled at her, holding her hand tightly.

The more Qiao Yu avoided asking anything, the guiltier Lin Qing felt in her heart.

In fact, Lin Qing has always known that there is a problem in a corner of her heart.

After reuniting with Qiao Yu, her heart, which had nowhere to rest, finally found peace. The suffocating world, like the moon, was rejuvenated with vitality, but only in that corner, as if there was still a voice of reason almost coldly repeating itself over and over.

—How do you know she won’t leave again?

Even though she temporarily felt reassured knowing that the key satisfaction hadn’t declined or improved much, on one hand she felt at ease, but on the other hand, she heard that voice resurface again: this might just be temporary.

Lin Qing felt angry about this, but what left her at a loss was that she gradually realized she couldn’t completely deny that voice.

The person she loved, with clear and gentle eyes, despite being rejected, had not given up, using persistent actions to silently declare to her time and time again that this time, she wouldn’t leave her side.

But as Lin Qing looked at her, the voice in her heart continued to call out calmly and passionately.

Grab her.

Hold her in the palm of your hand, bind her by your side, never let her leave.

Dangerous, yet so alluring it’s frightening.

Lin Qing knew this should be considered a psychological illness, but she was helpless to do anything about it.

She didn’t tell Qiao Yu about this matter because Qiao Yu was too gentle. Lin Qing could see that Qiao Yu was already feeling guilty to the core for leaving without saying goodbye, and her original anger had gradually softened into concern during this period. She didn’t want to burden Qiao Yu with too much heaviness, taking all responsibility upon herself – Qiao Yu did this for her, Lin Qing knew this in her heart.

Qiao Yu’s two years of pain were no less than hers; this person simply didn’t mention it.

If it weren’t for falling in love with her, Qiao Yu should have simply executed the mission as a matter of duty and returned to her original world after completing the task. Instead, she exerted all efforts to stay here, braving all obstacles, forever losing the way back to her world – Lin Qing didn’t dare dwell on this matter too deeply or consider what Qiao Yu was thinking when making this decision.

If this was a sin, then Lin Qing was an accomplice too.

She should have shared half of Qiao Yu’s pain.

But she unconsciously harbored despicable thoughts. Unmentionable desires and greed grew in the depths of her heart, nurturing a demon that emitted joyful sighs each time she approached Qiao Yu, whispering temptations in her ear: Bind Qiao Yu more tightly, with even more force.

Lin Qing realized that if left unchecked, all she could bring Qiao Yu was likely just shackles.

And she couldn’t even tell if that was the right thing to do.

In this unclear situation, Lin Qing was unwilling to let things drift carelessly. More than the temporarily unresolved feelings, she feared hurting Qiao Yu. Excessive restraint could lead to backlash, and if Qiao Yu ended up hating her because of it… just the thought of it caused panic.

At this point, the reason why she maintained such a vague relationship with Qiao Yu was no longer as simple as her being angry or unable to let go of her pride. It was her increasing… possessiveness.

This matter was known only to Lin Qing, who struggled to control herself and maintain a certain distance from Qiao Yu. If she couldn’t alleviate Qiao Yu’s worries, at the very least, she didn’t want to add more psychological burden to Qiao Yu.

But now Qiao Yu knew.

Although Qiao Yu appeared outwardly calm and showed no signs of conflict at all, when Lin Qing heard Qiao Yu say those words outside the school gate just now, she knew that her secret had been exposed.

Regardless of how reluctant she was, how desperately she screamed in her heart that this was not her fault, the clear eyes of that person were still filled with regret. Holding her hand and placing it on his face, gently resting his face in the palm of her hand, he repeatedly whispered softly, “I’m right here, I won’t leave you again.”

Undeniably, Lin Qing’s anxious feelings were indeed calmed by such words.

At the same time, this made her feel extremely guilty.

By the end of September, the daytime had already become shorter, and the pink-purple dusk gradually filled the entire sky. Dusk caught up from behind Lin Qing and Qiao Yu, engulfing the city in a warm and peaceful manner.

Before the sun set completely, they arrived at the doorstep of Lin Qing’s home and stopped together.

Qiao Yu, who had been trying to keep the conversation lively, finally ended the topic and turned to look at Lin Qing with an indescribable gentleness in her eyes.

“Would you like to invite me in for a sit?”

“…”

Lin Qing’s breath momentarily stopped, her hand tightened, then loosened slightly.

“…No,” she said softly, her voice light and airy. “Not today.”

“Is that so.”

Qiao Yu earnestly nodded in acceptance of her words, a bit silent for a moment.

“Lin Qing, you can rely on me.”

Don’t be like this.

Qiao Yu’s voice was very serious and solemn, but it made Lin Qing unable to help but lower her head and close her eyes. Holding Qiao Yu’s hand, she could feel the warmth and the faint pulse beneath the skin, indicating that the person in front of her was a lively and vibrant individual.

What’s wrong with this? Keeping that person within reach, even Qiao Yu agreed. So why wait?

The voice in her heart timely resurfaced again, like a whisper from an angel or demon, telling her that wanting to keep a loved one by her side was not a sin.

“…I understand.”

Her head throbbed in a jumping manner, Lin Qing spoke softly, restraining the trembling in her voice and lifted her eyes to look at Qiao Yu.

“I just… still need a little time.”

Like someone who had just been rescued from the bottom of a cliff, standing at the edge of an unstable cliff, constantly worried about another fall.

This was definitely not a good psychological state, and Lin Qing didn’t want to project any negative emotions onto Qiao Yu.

So, please… be patient with me, Qiao Yu.

Without needing much explanation, Lin Qing saw Qiao Yu nod, the gentle light in her eyes like a continuous flame, warm and not overbearing.

“How long do you need then?”

“…I…”

“Well, let’s set it for after my college entrance exams, how about that?”

Seemingly understanding that Lin Qing couldn’t give an exact time, Qiao Yu proposed a milestone for her, saying she would be quite busy during that time anyway, and smiled wryly as she rubbed the back of her head.

“Of course, I’ll be here whenever you need me.”

“Until then—let’s just keep it like this.”

She even naturally said the words that Lin Qing found difficult to articulate, and Lin Qing looked at her smiling eyes, feeling a sourness rising in her throat.

“It’s okay, I’m pretty good at waiting.”

Perhaps Lin Qing’s expression was too serious, Qiao Yu raised her hand to rub her face, lingering for a moment before leaving affectionately.

“But you still have to continue being my teacher, and when I rank in the top five in the future, the rewards will be…”

“I know. You are really…”

Lin Qing couldn’t help but be amused by Qiao Yu’s untimely sense of humor, seeing Qiao Yu’s tense shoulders easing as they both laughed together.

“You should go inside now, it’s getting dark.”

She pointed towards Lin Qing’s house, gesturing for her to go in before she left.

Lin Qing lightly nodded, mustering a lot of willpower to release Qiao Yu’s hand, trying hard not to dwell on the sense of loss in her heart, and walked away with her back to Qiao Yu.

“…Qiao Yu.”

After only taking a couple of steps, Lin Qing couldn’t help but stop, as Qiao Yu’s response came from behind. Without turning around, Lin Qing hesitated for a moment before continuing.

“Your birthday is coming up, right? Is there something you want?”

“…”

There was a moment of surprised silence from the person behind her, followed quickly by a slightly bitter laugh.

“Is the teacher going to give me a gift?”

She emphasized the word “teacher,” and Lin Qing immediately understood her meaning but couldn’t find a way to refute it.

“I can’t think of anything right now… If I had to say, I’d like the acceptance letter from your school.”

“…I can’t give you that.”

“That’s true.”

There was a light laughter from Qiao Yu behind her, who laughed twice and then stopped abruptly, her voice suddenly lowering.

“…Let’s just forget about it. And I won’t be having a party this year either—since I just had one recently.”

“Because I also missed your birthdays for two years…”

“Qiao Yu.”

Interrupting Qiao Yu’s increasingly melancholic voice, Lin Qing forcefully shook her head.

“That’s not the same thing.”

“I… I’ve long stopped blaming you.”

As if releasing a heavy burden, Lin Qing spoke these words, hearing Qiao Yu’s slight inhale, followed by a slightly nasal response.

“…I see.”

Lin Qing dared not look back at her, sensing that if she did, she would surely go and embrace her, leading to further entanglement and difficulty in parting.

But resisting such temptation was too difficult. Therefore, Lin Qing turned around, hugged Qiao Yu, even allowed herself to gently kiss the corner of her lips, then driven by shame and willpower, she let go of her and hurriedly entered the house.

Until the moment she closed the door, Lin Qing could feel Qiao Yu’s gentle gaze following her from behind, like a shadow.

Coming home late today, fortunately, Qiao Yu’s parents were not home, so she was able to avoid questioning and quietly ate dinner before retreating to her room alone.

“…”

She wasted no time, immediately taking out her study materials after washing up, turning on the desk lamp and sitting down.

“…Host…”

However, her ever-concerned ally was not as composed as her, and finally couldn’t resist speaking up.

“…Does it really not matter? Leaving Lin Qing alone like that…”

The system was filled with concern, feeling like it might have been a better choice to follow Lin Qing into the house entrance— even though Lin Qing herself had rejected it, she seemed like she really wanted to continue being together with the host.

And the host clearly cared a lot about it as well; the first thing she did upon returning home was to send a message to Lin Qing to ensure she was safe. Even now, her phone was right beside her, afraid of missing any contact from Lin Qing.

Since everyone is the same, why not just go ahead and do it?

“Whether it matters or not, how to proceed is something that Lin Qing should decide.”

Qiao Yu paused her pen momentarily, her eyes flickering.

“The first thing I needed to do at that time was to determine whether her words were genuine or just a show of strength.”

“…I don’t know if I should consider myself lucky or unlucky, but what Lin Qing said at that time was sincere. She did indeed want some time.”

Recalling the slightly red-eyed yet still confident look in Lin Qing’s eyes at that moment, Qiao Yu smiled with complex emotions.

“To be honest, I feel like it wouldn’t matter what she wanted to do to me—but oh well, it’s better this way.”

“Because I myself was still in an unstable state, so saying those words was probably also a kind of irresponsible behavior on my part.”

She spoke and then lowered her gaze back to the topic, the system listening somewhat puzzled, persistently asking.

“But… but, after hearing Lin Qing worry that the host might leave, wouldn’t it be better for the host to reassure her more?”

“…Those reassurances were already sufficient.”

Faced with the almost out-of-control Lin Qing, filled with deep regrets, Qiao Yu couldn’t remember how many times she had to call Lin Qing back.

The power of words is sometimes feeble.

“Beyond that, what I need to do now is more important.”

“First, it’s studying. In any case, I must pass the entrance exam for Lin Qing’s school. It’s a critical battle to the point of no return, failure is not an option.”

“Then, it’s taking care of my own health, to live on, to stay healthy, to live longer than… a bit longer if possible.”

Not understanding how the topic suddenly shifted from studying to the rather weighty matter of living on, the system voiced its confusion, beginning to question whether there were other limitations in this world for the host that it wasn’t aware of. Fortunately, Qiao Yu’s next sentence dispelled this worry, but the content left the system at a loss for words.

“Until the day when both Lin Qing and I are old, with white hair and failing eyesight, needing to support each other while walking.”

“By that time, she will always know that when I say I won’t leave her anymore, it’s true.”

A lie, no matter how many times it’s told, will never come true, while a genuine statement uttered from the heart feels pale even when spoken.

Qiao Yu once said she wanted to be with Lin Qing day and night.

She will prove it through actions, that is definitely not a lie.

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