It’s you who made me feel this pain
Who could have thought the last two days of this trip would turn out like this?
Qiao Yu sat on the room’s sofa, reflecting on the day of departure, feeling as if it were a lifetime ago.
Now it’s already the last night of the trip, tomorrow morning they will leave here.
The relationship between Qiao Yu and Lin Qing is still a mess.
After experiencing the last failure, to avoid meeting Lin Qing, Qiao Yu has rarely stepped out of her room these two days.
The silence at that time undoubtedly revealed the fact that Lin Qing simply didn’t want to see her, making Qiao Yu almost lose all hope.
“…Did the host cry?”
“Not yet.”
But soon. Qiao Yu rubbed her brows, suddenly understanding the mentality of those who resort to drowning their sorrows in alcohol.
When there’s something you don’t want to face, and you’re powerless to change it, choosing to escape is a natural human reaction.
“What should we do now…? Can the host and Lin Qing go back to how things were before…?”
“…”
Especially when there’s an untimely voice in her head that keeps bringing up this issue, Qiao Yu really felt like getting herself drunk.
Ah, if she were to look for Lin Qing after getting drunk, would Lin Qing, out of old times’ sake, take care of her…
Such an absurd idea starting to emerge, Qiao Yu helplessly closed her eyes, sighing deeply.
“Tomorrow I’ll have to go back, and then there will even be less of a chance to be with Lin Qing all the time… If I wait until school starts to solve this, by then I expect the relationship between the host and Lin Qing will have already retreated to being just familiar strangers—”
She really was at her wit’s end.
Both personally and publicly, she didn’t want to keep going on like this with Lin Qing.
But with things having developed to this point, going to apologize without clearly understanding the problem, like before, seemed like very rude behavior.
And Qiao Yu only had the system in her head to discuss this with. Even though she frequently received concern from Cong Ye, she couldn’t reveal a word to him, apologizing in her heart to him for being dragged into this.
“Tomorrow we’ll have to go back, and then there will even be less of a chance to be with Lin Qing all the time… If we wait until school starts to solve this, by then I expect the relationship between the host and Lin Qing will have already retreated to being just familiar strangers—”
“Say less… I’ll really cry, okay?”
The system indeed has a sincere heart, but it absolutely can’t come up with any constructive suggestions, just keeps being pessimistic.
Ah, Qiao Yu felt like she was about to cry.
This kind of helpless feeling is too terrible. Even after two days of getting used to it, Qiao Yu has become quite calm, but she still feels a hidden pain.
She also wants to resolve this matter in Japan, but looking at the current situation…
Qiao Yu glanced at the clock pointing to half past eleven and listlessly lowered her head.
…Not being able to think of a reliable plan for two days, nor finding anyone to help, it was just her alone, working in isolation.
Now is not the time to continue wallowing in the pain of being avoided by Lin Qing…ha.
Nice words are easy to say, but what exactly should be done?
Not being able to sleep well for two days made her mind not very clear, Qiao Yu tiredly massaged her slightly aching temples.
Knock knock.
At this time, her door was knocked on.
Qiao Yu had no idea who the visitor could be, puzzled, she walked over and opened the door.
“Good evening, it’s so good you haven’t slept yet.”
The person she was just thinking about was now standing right in front of her, alive and real. Lin Qing greeted her calmly and indifferently, lowering her gaze without looking at her.
“…Ah, ah.”
As if hit on the head by a huge surprise falling from the sky, Qiao Yu was momentarily dazzled, as if she had lost the ability to speak, only able to utter monotonous syllables, staring blankly at Lin Qing.
There were heavy dark circles under her eyes, Have you been resting well? These past two days, she had been ordering room service, hearing from Cong Ye that Lin Qing was eating normally, but why does it seem now that she still looks not too well?
Qiao Yu watched Lin Qing’s face almost obsessively, unwilling to blink.
It had only been two days not seen, but she felt as if it had been a very long time since she last saw Lin Qing, a corner of her heart feeling as though a weight had been lifted.
She finally saw Lin Qing again.
Without knowing Lin Qing’s purpose, Qiao Yu was already filled with joy, the impending wave of sour and bitter emotions nearly bringing tears to her eyes.
Qiao Yu really missed her deeply.
“May I come in?”
Lin Qing’s cool voice rang out again, and it was only then that Qiao Yu, as if waking from a dream, moved aside to let her in.
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Only now did she have the capacity to ponder Lin Qing’s intentions. Qiao Yu gently closed the door, and the click of the lock snapping into place suddenly startled her.
In her room, just the two of them, late at night.
It wasn’t meant to be romantic. Qiao Yu’s forehead started to sweat lightly.
It was very similar to the night of Lin Qing’s birthday.
A flood of negative memories overwhelmed her, and Qiao Yu suddenly became timid, not daring to turn around.
…What if Lin Qing was here to break off their friendship?
Even though this idea was quite absurd, being in a familiar place and at a familiar time, Qiao Yu couldn’t help but think the worst.
Fortunately, Lin Qing’s voice sounded just in time, saving her from the heavy bad thoughts.
But what Lin Qing said was very abrupt, completely unrelated to the underlying issues between the two of them, as if starting a casual conversation.
“This is for you.”
Saying this, Lin Qing handed over a bag that looked like it was from a convenience store to Qiao Yu. The bag wasn’t heavy, and Qiao Yu, puzzled, looked at Lin Qing. With her gaze’s silent consent, she took out the item from the bag.
“Help me pierce an earhole.”
Holding alcohol cotton and a disposable ear piercing tool, Qiao Yu blinked blankly.
The progression of events was so sudden, Qiao Yu felt she couldn’t keep up.
Lin Qing was sitting in front of her, her hair rolled up, revealing her fair and delicate left ear.
It was still a whole ear, but…
Qiao Yu looked at the ear piercing tool in her hand, swallowing dryly.
“…… Maybe let’s not? After all, it’s going to hurt, it might be better to do it at a regular hospital—”
“I just want to do it today.”
Lin Qing directly interrupted her, eyes downturned.
“If you don’t want to, it’s okay, I can do it myself.”
Saying this, she reached out to take the ear piercing tool, while Qiao Yu quickly stepped back a few steps to keep it out of reach, facing those calm and waveless eyes.
“You can’t see your own ears, wouldn’t that be even more dangerous?”
In response to Qiao Yu’s concerned words, Lin Qing showed no change in expression, merely withdrawing her hand and silently turning her head towards her. The implication was clear without words.
Qiao Yu found herself at a loss with Lin Qing.
She didn’t understand why Lin Qing was being suddenly capricious, but still resignedly opened the ear piercing tool’s packaging, holding the small device that looked like a stapler and turning it over and over three or four times, her worry growing rather than diminishing.
…Why does Lin Qing, such a steady person, suddenly choose to get her ears pierced in this way?
“The gift you gave me, isn’t it a pair of stud earrings?”
As if sensing Qiao Yu’s confusion, Lin Qing spoke indifferently.
“I don’t have piercings now, so I can’t wear them.”
“…That was originally for you to wear later, there’s no need to rush at this moment…”
Lin Qing turned a deaf ear to Qiao Yu’s puzzled admonitions, showing no intention of responding.
Meeting with a cold shoulder, Qiao Yu felt unaccustomed to such a cold and hard attitude from Lin Qing, and fell silent. She swallowed the sourness in her heart and tore open the alcohol swab.
She walked over to Lin Qing, held her breath, and carefully lifted Lin Qing’s earlobe, gently disinfecting it.
This was probably the first time she touched someone else’s earlobe besides her own, finding the touch soft and warm, seemingly not quite the same as touching her own.
So, she took the opportunity to wipe and disinfect with alcohol to touch it a few more times, thinking she wouldn’t be caught, but she was quickly stopped.
“…Is it not done yet?”
Lin Qing’s tone lost its previous calm and composure, seeming to mix in some restlessness, showing an unstable breath.
“Ah, it’s done.”
Qiao Yu quickly withdrew her hand and, under Lin Qing’s direction, picked up a pen, hesitating and indecisive.
“Where do you want it?”
“On the earlobe, just choose a spot you like.”
After her hand moved away, Lin Qing quickly returned to a businesslike tone, making Qiao Yu somewhat disheartened.
But now was not the time to think about those things. Qiao Yu dismissed the distractions and seriously marked a black dot on Lin Qing’s earlobe as the spot for the ear hole later on.
The main event was next.
Despite being full of worries, Qiao Yu still tried her best to steady her hand and pressed the ear-piercing tool against Lin Qing’s earlobe.
While she hesitated, Lin Qing suddenly spoke.
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“After you press it, it will hurt.”
“…”
Qiao Yu panicked immediately, hurriedly withdrawing the ear-piercing tool.
“Then, why…?”
Why suddenly bring this up? Why insist on getting her ears pierced today? Why have her do this? And why completely avoid mentioning the grudge between them?
Lin Qing’s every action tonight was extremely odd, leaving Qiao Yu completely baffled.
Confused, she looked at Lin Qing, only to see the latter silently smiling. That smile seemed to carry a kind of resolution, so beautiful it was hard to look away.
“I knew it would hurt, yet I still came to you.”
“I just wanted you to know this.”
For the first time today, Lin Qing’s gaze finally landed on her. That elusive look, like a net or smoke, captured all of Qiao Yu’s attention, making her dive wholeheartedly into that deep, unfathomable sea of night.
“Come on, Qiao Yu.”
Her name, whispered from the depths of her throat, ensnared Qiao Yu like a sailor bewitched by the Siren’s song, compelling her to lift the ear piercing tool again as if possessed.
Click.
“Hisss.”
She almost used up all her strength to finally press down that mechanism. The sound of the mechanism and Lin Qing’s light hiss sounded together, causing a sharp pain in her heart, and her arms trembled uncontrollably.
Qiao Yu clenched her teeth, steadied her hand, and slowly released the pressure to take off the ear piercing tool. Her hands were so weak that she didn’t hold it firmly, and the tool fell onto the carpet of the room with a muffled sound.
Qiao Yu didn’t care about it and hurried over to examine Lin Qing’s ear. The wound there was not serious, just a small one, with some blood inevitably flowing around it, not much, but enough to make Qiao Yu feel extremely distressed.
“How is it? Does it hurt a lot? You’re bleeding—”
She was at a loss, her panic clearly visible, full of worry and guilt for hurting Lin Qing.
Lin Qing gently laughed.
Unexpectedly, she wrapped her arms around Qiao Yu’s neck, almost as if to kiss her, lifting her head.
Those eyes, washed by the night spring, were close at hand, with long eyelashes fluttering, like a butterfly ready to take flight.
“…It’s you who made me feel this pain.”
Lin Qing’s body trembled slightly, she said softly.
“It’s because of you, I feel this pain.”
She raised her face, smiling like she was about to cry, tears gradually reddening her eyes.
“…You have to remember, Qiao Yu.”
Qiao Yu’s heart felt as if it had been pricked by a needle, gradually becoming a fine, dense pain.
For some reason, she suddenly realized this was a reconciliation initiated by Lin Qing.
It was as if Lin Qing had thrown her an olive branch, allowing her to climb up from the endless sea of suffering and return to her side.
But when she climbed back to shore, she realized what she was holding was not an olive branch at all but the thorns entwined around Lin Qing. Every move she made only caused Lin Qing more pain.
She wanted to let go, to throw away the thorns, but found she couldn’t do it no matter how hard she tried.
Qiao Yu suddenly realized, she seemed to be the thorns herself.
“…I’m sorry.”
Lin Qing’s trembling passed through their body contact to her, making Qiao Yu unable to contain herself, blurting out the first sentence that came to her mind.
She still didn’t understand the reason, but dimly realized that she was the very culprit causing Lin Qing such pain.
“I don’t like Cong Ye.”
“Um, I know.”
“Don’t push me towards him anymore.”
“Okay, no more.”
“Don’t guess on your own, ask me if you want to know anything.”
“…Mn.”
Lin Qing said one sentence after another, and Qiao Yu responded to each.
The system in her brain emitted worries that wanted to speak but stopped, but Qiao Yu didn’t want to pay attention to it at this time. She just focused on listening to Lin Qing’s words, accepting them all without hesitation. “And then,”
Lin Qing suddenly stopped speaking, lowered her eyelids, and leaned her body forward onto Qiao Yu’s shoulder.
“I’ve been ignoring you these past few days, I’m sor—”
“No need.”
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Qiao Yu interrupted her before she could finish, hesitantly raising her hand to pat her back.
“…You never need to apologize to me.”
Actually, she would rather have Lin Qing be angry with her, scold her, and vent everything onto her.
That would be better than now, with Lin Qing obviously harboring worries, feeling depressed but unable to express, and her having no solution.
Lin Qing didn’t insist on apologizing, rubbing her head against her shoulder, seemingly smiling.
“Qiao Yu.”
Qiao Yu couldn’t see her expression and responded with a “Hmm,” but didn’t hear any follow-up for a long time.
After a while, Lin Qing’s voice sounded again.
“… Qiao Yu.”
No content, she just softly called Qiao Yu’s name again.
Like carefully confirming Qiao Yu’s existence, filled with countless complex and intense emotions, and a sigh so light it was almost inaudible.
Just like that, an incredible pain arose in Qiao Yu’s chest.
At this moment, she deeply realized that she seemed to occupy a heavier position in Lin Qing’s heart than she had imagined.
Before Qiao Yu could feel happy, she first fell into pain and anxiety.
If either getting close or staying away would hurt Lin Qing.
What should she do?
LP: Get close, you dummy (ノ｀Д´)ノ
