The End of Memories (2)
Lin Yan kicked, punched, and bit, trying to break free, but eventually, she cried herself out.
Song Yuhang gently patted her back, soothing her as they sat on the floor.
The overburdened computer emitted a dying electrical hum, its screen flickering, and Lin Yan gradually couldn’t see his face clearly.
“Yanyan, Daddy is sorry. Come home. There’s something for you under the swing set at the old house.”
“Lin Youyuan, you bastard! You… don’t go… come… come back!”
Lin Yan stretched out her arm to reach him, but before her fingertips could touch the screen, the computer had already breathed its last.
“Lin Youyuan, get back here! Come back and explain yourself! Why?! Why do you get to walk away after doing so many wrong things? Don’t even think about it! Don’t think you can get away! I won’t let you be happy! I’ll make sure you can’t rest in peace even in death…”
Lin Yan, self-righteously, grabbed whatever she could from the ground and threw it: “Say something… say something…”
By the end, her words had already turned into sobs.
“Lin Yan!” Song Yuhang called her name with a heavier tone, holding her face to focus her gaze on hers.
“He’s already dead. Lin Ge is also dead. Lin Jueshui has been executed, and Zhao Junfeng is dead too. They’ve all paid the price for what they’ve done. Lin Yan, stop tormenting yourself… stop tormenting yourself…”
When their eyes met, Lin Yan finally came to her senses from her somewhat crazed state.
Seeing the tears shimmering in Song Yuhang’s eyes, she began to cry uncontrollably again.
Song Yuhang waited for her to cry it out, then carried her to take a bath.
Lin Yan, like a delicate porcelain doll, let herself be handled.
Song Yuhang’s fingers ran through her hair, drying it for her.
Lin Yan: “You said they all paid the price for what they’ve done. They took bullets, but what about the others?”
Lin Yan, in her quest for revenge, had turned herself into a ghostly figure for the first half of her life.
Chen Chu Nan’s mother, in her search for the truth, wandered across most of China, finally dying in her hometown in miserable circumstances.
The butcher who died unjustly in prison, Guo Xiaoguang and his mother, living in fear and anonymity for the rest of their lives.
Even those who had already died.
Those she personally dissected, those written on the thousand paper cranes.
Bai Ling.
Wu Wei.
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He Miao.
Ding Xue.
Li Shiping.
……
Who would compensate them for their youth and once vibrant lives?
Song Yuhang had no words, put down the hairdryer, and embraced her, kissing the top of her head, offering comfort.
She thought, perhaps the world’s smartest philosophers, even Socrates, couldn’t answer this question.
But it didn’t matter. She could say something else, like: I love you.
Lin Yan, tired from crying and raging, finally fell asleep in her arms.
Song Yuhang’s phone, placed by the bed, vibrated. She reached for it. Outside, the sky was already bright. The photographer had sent over their wedding photos.
She browsed through them, selecting the one where Lin Yan was smiling the brightest, and posted it:
My dear forensic lady, don’t cry.
I am willing to pay any price to love you. This vow is valid for life, subject to review.
After returning from Saipan, Lin Yan soon received a call from the auction house. The Lin residence she had entrusted to them for auction had some progress, and they asked her to come over and sort things out.
As the ornate iron gate slowly opened before her, Lin Yan could almost see the once bustling scene.
Lin Youyuan was pushed out by the butler, followed by a large group of well-dressed elites.
Two half-grown children played in the garden, with the nanny chasing behind.
“Lin Ge, hurry up, let’s play over there.”
“Miss, miss, stop running. You can’t catch the goldfish in the pond. The master spent a lot of money to buy those…”
Seeing the nanny about to catch up, the little girl splashed water from the pond onto her, clutching a lively goldfish in her arms and running away, only to slip on the moss and fall face-first.
The goldfish flopped on the ground.
The girl fell by the wheelchair, and someone lifted her up with one hand.
Lin Youyuan, with a cold face, said sternly, “Take her away, put her in confinement. Let her out only when she knows she’s wrong.”
“Let go of me, let go of me… bastard!”
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……
In the blink of an eye, those scenes disappeared.
Song Yuhang pulled her in: “Where’s the swing set?”
Lin Yan lowered her eyes: “In the back garden.”
Behind the Lin family mansion, there is an artificial forest planted with osmanthus, camphor, birch, and ginkgo trees. Each season presents its own scenery, and the wind rustles through the leaves, creating a whispering sound.
Due to the lack of maintenance, the fallen leaves from last autumn and winter have formed a layer of decaying and soft soil underfoot.
The two of them walked through the forest, their steps uneven.
The swing set was placed under the birch tree, covered in dust, swaying slightly in the air.
Lin Yan touched the marks on the birch tree beside it and said, “There wasn’t a swing set here originally…”
“Then…” Song Yuhang asked curiously.
Lin Yan smiled, “When Lin Ge and I were kids, we played here and suddenly thought of tying a swing with a hemp rope on the tree. We didn’t take any safety measures, and ended up falling flat on our backs.”
“The next day, this swing set was built.”
Song Yuhang wiped the dust off the seat with a tissue, “Want to sit on it?”
Lin Yan’s gaze fell from the swing to the thick layer of fallen leaves below and she said softly, “No, let’s dig.”
Song Yuhang found a spade, and Lin Yan also found a thick tree branch to help dig the soil, but was pulled away.
“No need, you just wait on the side. It won’t take long.”
About ten minutes later, beads of sweat appeared on Song Yuhang’s forehead, and she could no longer dig with the spade.
She threw the spade aside and started digging with her hands.
“Found it.”
They uncovered a rusted iron box.
Song Yuhang wiped the dirt off the box and handed it to her, “This must be it.”
Lin Yan reached out, then hesitated and pulled back her hand. After a moment, encouraged by Song Yuhang, she finally took the iron box and pried it open with effort.
Inside were more than a dozen gold bars and a yellowed photo.
The photo showed Lin Youyuan with his arms around the shoulders of his two good friends, standing on a reef. Su Yue stood leaning against the reef, pulling at Lin Youyuan’s collar, making his expression a bit twisted and funny, but everyone was smiling.
That unrestrained, bright smile made Lin Yan’s eyes burn. She turned the photo over.
On the back was a line of words: I’m sorry, Lin Yan. This is the only photo of your mother that Daddy has.
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Don’t blame your mother for the name she gave you. If she didn’t love you, she wouldn’t have given birth to you, and she certainly wouldn’t have left you to me in her final moments.1
If you see this, it means Daddy is no longer here. The gold bars are for your emergency needs, but I hope you never have to use them.
Finally, Yanyan… Daddy loves you.
It was signed with the three characters of Lin Youyuan.
Lin Yan stared at it, her eyes quickly filling with tears.
Song Yuhang, meanwhile, found a few wooden sticks and some tattered paper strips at the bottom of the box.
“This is…”
With just one glance, Lin Yan recognized what it was.
“Lin Ge, do you think he would like it?”
Footnotes
- “林” (lín) means “forest” or “woods.” It represents nature and can signify attributes like strength, vitality, and abundance. “厭” (yàn) can have multiple meanings depending on the context. It can mean “dislike,” “loathe,” or “be weary of” when used as a verb. As a noun, it can refer to a kind of ornamental jade, or it can mean “satiated” or “fed up” when used in a negative context.
