Little Alpaca – Chapter 6

Volume 1: Little Alpaca

The Alpaca’s Method of Cooking.

To be held in the arms of a beauty and have your fur smoothed, what kind of experience is that?

A certain alpaca who wished to remain anonymous expressed: that is certainly a feeling of hovering between life and death.

Yi Qiu had never been a star-chasing girl¹, but she often, when brushing videos² or brushing hot searches, saw some celebrities or internet-famous people petting cats and petting dogs.

A beauty and a cute pet, the picture is naturally extremely beautiful. Beneath this kind of picture, the comments and bullet comments³ usually are not lacking several kinds of voices.

—Ahhhh, to be human is not as good as being a cat or dog!
—I want to soul-transmigrate⁴ into that cat or dog!
—Hello everyone, I am that cat or dog, I am very happy right now!

At this very moment, Yi Qiu, who was personally on the scene, wanted to cry but had no tears.

During the entire process of being fed rice by the Demon Lord, she was constantly in a state of her brain having crashed⁵.

She gave up resisting, tearfully playing the part of a plush toy that could be freely arranged by anyone, numbly opening her mouth, numbly chewing, numbly having her head kneaded by the person before her. Her body, which should have been soft, was stiff to an extreme.

The blood of the demon race is cold. You Yan’s fingers were extremely icy, her nails both sharp and long. Every time they lightly scraped across Yi Qiu’s fur, it was enough to make Yi Qiu’s entire body grow cold with dread.

Yi Qiu also didn’t want to be so nervous, but she was just especially afraid of You Yan, afraid for no reason since the very first meeting.

Before, she had no deep understanding of the four characters ‘snake-scorpion beauty’⁶, but today, if someone were to ask her what a snake-scorpion beauty was, she would only need two characters to perfectly explain it—You Yan.

Yi Qiu could be certain, this bird-woman⁷ whose demon form was neither snake nor scorpion, her ‘snake-scorpion’ index was absolutely higher than all the snakes and scorpions in the world.

Reason? There’s fundamentally no need for a reason!

She had just never seen this kind of woman who was clearly smiling while feeding her own pet rice, yet whose entire face was written with “if you dare to disobey, I will do you in.”

Terrifying, truly too terrifying!

In the past, when reading novels, Yi Qiu had always felt she was quite clever.

The author’s meticulously buried foreshadowing⁸, the details in the text that not many people noticed, and also the many sweet-and-sour points⁹ that echoed each other from front to back, she could see most of them, and could also, from time to time, post some long, analytical reviews, acting as the class representative¹⁰, drawing successive ‘likes’ from other readers in the comment section.

She had truly thought that if she ever had a day where she transmigrated into a book to survive, under the circumstances of knowing the plot’s direction, she should be able to mix her way up like a cool-text¹¹ female lead, with wind and water rising¹².

But the facts proved she was wrong. On the second day of her book transmigration, she was suppressed in all aspects by a crazy-batch¹³ villain.

This You Yan was fundamentally carrying out entrapment-fishing law enforcement¹⁴ on her.

She could now basically be certain that her abnormal behavior yesterday must have aroused You Yan’s suspicion, otherwise You Yan would not be using both soft and hard tactics to play with her.

Correct, it was precisely ‘to play with’, this word was used particularly aptly.

From small to large, Yi Qiu had never been an outstanding girl, but no matter how ordinary and common, she was also the sole seedling¹⁵ of the family. Never had she been played with in the palm of a hand¹⁶ like she was today.

But she had no way to resist.

The power of this body was too weak and small, so weak that never mind facing a generation’s Demon Lord, even if she brought over her body from the present world which lacked exercise, with a bit more strength she could take care of this alpaca.

She had more or less figured it out. By being so meek and submissive¹⁷, she wouldn’t get hurt, and there would still be rice to eat.

As for things like dignity, face¹⁸, they all belonged to a little alpaca in a novel’s world. Even if they were lost completely and cleanly, what did it have to do with her, an honest and good-natured corporate slave from the 21st century?

Thinking like this, Yi Qiu filled her stomach while bearing immense psychological pressure, and then, with a stiff neck, drank a few mouthfuls of soup, only then did she tentatively wriggle out from the palm of You Yan’s hand.

After getting two meters away from You Yan, she couldn’t help but release a breath of relief, her expression like one who had received a new life.

She subconsciously wanted to slip away, but discovered that at this very moment, the room’s door was tightly shut, the bolt moreover protected by a strand of spiritual power. Even if she used her only eight toes to think, she could know that You Yan had fundamentally no intention of letting her go.

Yi Qiu bit her teeth, and with a face of collapse, she flopped down at the doorway.

After feeding her own spirit pet until it had eaten and drunk its fill, You Yan changed to a pair of wooden chopsticks and began to eat for her own sake.

The little alpaca’s rear was pressed against the un-rammable door crack, a pair of eyes resentfully staring at the wooden floor, its little mouth looking like it was crooked with anger, pouted up so high.

In her boredom, she began to act like a normal alpaca, using spitting saliva to express her dissatisfaction.

Of course, this time she didn’t dare to spit towards You Yan, only daring to spit randomly at the surrounding floor.

What she couldn’t have imagined was that this kind of cowardly-prick behavior of venting emotions actually gained a certain amount of favorability.

Yi Qiu raised her head in astonishment to glance at You Yan, seeing her currently holding a small spoon and drinking soup, without the slightest intention of paying her any mind.

“This favorability’s increase and decrease is really inexplicable…” Yi Qiu muttered softly in the bottom of her heart. The system, for a rare change, was quiet and didn’t appear to say anything.

The system made no sound, You Yan did not speak. Yi Qiu, for a moment bored to death, lowered her head to look at her own somewhat matted and yellowed fur.

Although she didn’t feel itchy or uncomfortable, her current self seemed a bit too dirty, especially her four hooves.

Just two days ago, Yi Qiu was still a human who loved cleanliness. She also hadn’t expected that after being an alpaca for merely two days, she could actually become dirty to this degree.

Some things, it’s fine if you don’t pay attention, but once you see them you feel uncomfortable all over.

I must find a place to have a good wash-wash later, when You Yan is willing to let me go, Yi Qiu thought.

Just then, You Yan suddenly put down the soup bowl in her hand, raised her brows, and swept a faint glance toward the alpaca sitting flopped at the door.

The moment she was suddenly stared at, Yi Qiu was like a student caught slacking off in class by the teacher. She instantly sat up straight, her long neck held ramrod-straight, her expression what you would call obedient and sensible.

A pair of small eyes filled with expectation, as if asking You Yan: “Teacher, is it possible to be dismissed from class now?”

You Yan sized the little alpaca up and down, her gaze finally stopping on those four grimy hooves.

“Already so dirty.” She said leisurely, rising and moving forward amidst Yi Qiu’s dodging gaze.

The gauze curtain hanging to the side suddenly seemed to come alive, sliding down from the pillar and rushing towards Yi Qiu’s face, instantly blocking her line of sight.

Yi Qiu was exceptionally flustered. She hurriedly used her hooves to pull down the gauze curtain covering her forehead, only then seeing that the curtain had already been spread over the saliva-covered wooden planks, becoming a clean path under You Yan’s feet.

You Yan was walking towards her. She subconsciously swallowed, wanting to retreat yet having no way to retreat. For a time, the entire alpaca cowered by the door, shrinking into a large furball.

“What are you hiding from? Little dirty ghost¹⁹.” You Yan said, bending down and reaching out to pick her up.

The sense of weightlessness from her four feet suddenly leaving the ground gave Yi Qiu a big fright. She couldn’t help but tremble, and following an instinct, her four dirty little feet kicked about randomly for a few seconds before finally, obediently, shrinking into You Yan’s embrace.

The Demon Lord did not disdain the dirty little fellow in her arms, only rubbing Yi Qiu’s head on one side while carrying her out of the room on the other.

“Mmm~” Is she taking me to bathe?

Yi Qiu blankly raised her eyes, only able to see You Yan’s fair neck, as well as that nearly perfect jawline.

This villain had not failed the author’s descriptions. She was truly very beautiful, more beautiful than any famous female star Yi Qiu had seen in her life.

When reading the novel, Yi Qiu could never understand why the male lead, after his blackening, could forgive You Yan for her past deceptions, but now she could somewhat understand.

Faced with such a face, it would be the same no matter which big pig’s trotter²⁰ was substituted in; wouldn’t they all believe whatever You Yan said, and forget their own family and given names?

Although she didn’t dare believe it, Yi Qiu had to admit, You Yan’s posture for holding people… er, no, for holding alpacas was extremely gentle and considerate. At this very moment, she was shrunk in You Yan’s embrace. Aside from comfort, there was also a sense of security whose origin could not be spoken.

For a moment, Yi Qiu even dazedly thought, if she didn’t know she would ultimately be slaughtered and eaten by this woman, she might really have been able to ignore the female lead and directly climb the wall²¹ to defect.

However, such a thought only lasted for a few short seconds before being completely deleted from her brain.

Because You Yan had brought her, who had just eaten and drunk her fill, into a kitchen.

She, with a dazed-and-confused face, was placed back on the ground by You Yan. She stretched her long neck, staring as You Yan personally drew a basin of water, and then squatted by her side, grabbing her two dirty front hooves and putting them inside.

It’s unknown if it was a psychological effect, but the moment she touched that icy foot-washing water, Yi Qiu couldn’t help but shiver.

Speaking reasonably, she was a bit unable to figure out why she had to wash her feet in the kitchen.

Just as Yi Qiu was confused, something suddenly, from top to bottom, fell successively into her ‘foot-washing basin’.

In the two days since transmigrating into this world, Yi Qiu felt like she was riding a roller coaster. Her little heart, which was not very strong to begin with, was what you would call seven up and eight down²², already like a bird startled by the twang of a bow²³, unable to take any more frights.

Precisely because of this, although those ‘high-altitude falling objects’ were both small and light, they still scared her half to death.

The little alpaca struggled, wanting to escape, but discovered its two front hooves were as if glued inside the basin, unable to be pulled out no matter what.

She tightly shut her eyes, begging for mercy for a good while with pig-slaughtering-like “Mmm-mmm-uh-uh” sounds. The anticipated pain did not arrive, and only then did she slowly open a sliver of an eye, glancing into the foot-washing basin.

It would have been fine not to look, but one look and her whole body couldn’t stop trembling.

Those things floating back and forth in her foot-washing basin, from time to time colliding with her little alpaca hooves, were nothing else but…

Scallion blossoms, ginger slices, star anise, cinnamon bark.

This, th-th-this… aren’t these all seasonings used to remove the gaminess from mutton?

“So… so it turns out, the alpaca’s method of cooking is about the same as a sheep’s…”

“Ugh-woo… Mmm-ah, Mmm~~!”

The shivering little alpaca began to incessantly whimper and beg for mercy, a pair of small eyes brimming with tears, crying until the soft fur by her eyes became moist.

I was wrong, I was wrong, Lord Villain!

Although I often shout that living is meaningless, and complain every day that the human world isn’t worth it, I really never thought about wanting to die!

Just as Yi Qiu was scared to the point of shouting and screaming, a system notification suddenly brushed out in her mind.

【You Yan Favorability +20】

“What the ghost?”²⁴

Yi Qiu only felt a head full of fog²⁵. In a trance, she seemed to hear a light laugh.

She blankly raised her head, only to see a trace of a smile gradually ripple across that face that was usually slightly icy, rarely without a hint of bone-chilling cold or ridicule.

You Yan’s eyes and brows were long and fine, naturally possessing a certain charm; when she smiled, she was especially beautiful.

Yi Qiu couldn’t help but stare with dumbfounded eyes. When she returned to her senses, she had already been carried back into You Yan’s embrace, for a moment so shocked her little mouth couldn’t close.

“Not teasing you anymore.” You Yan said softly, taking Yi Qiu to a clear spring.

Yi Qiu’s mood was ten-thousand-parts complicated, but she no longer dared to show the slightest bit of it.

She jumped into the spring and spent quite a bit of effort giving herself a full-body bath.

The little alpaca’s body, having soaked its white fur in the cool spring water, for a moment appeared even more thin and weak, as if a gust of wind could snap its slender little legs.

You Yan only sat sideways on a mountain rock to the side, the black gauze at the end of her long robe drooping into the water’s surface and wetting a corner, yet her gaze still wandered, her thoughts gone who knows where.

Yi Qiu stood up from the spring’s edge, her line of sight unconsciously gazing at You Yan for a moment. When she retracted her gaze, a feeling that could not be clearly spoken or explained had grown in the bottom of her heart.

This great villain, it seems she isn’t as cold-blooded as the author wrote her to be.

She took a deep breath, and from who knows where, ate a bear’s heart and a leopard’s gall²⁶. She lightly-handed and lightly-footed²⁷ crept forward, stood at the side of the mountain rock, and crazily shook her soaking wet body.

“You…” You Yan returned to her senses, a hint of astonishment seemingly in her gaze.

The little alpaca, seeing its prank had succeeded, hurriedly turned and scurried away with a waddling butt²⁸, dragging a body of wet, heavy, long fur, its footsteps nevertheless light to an absurd degree.

Yi Qiu ran all the way back to her own room. On the way, she seemed to have received several system notifications. It wasn’t until she flopped back onto her plush sleeping mat that she pulled them open for a look-see.

【Intelligence +20】
【Strength +10】
【Spiritual Root +10】
【Agility +20】
【Health +10】
【You Yan Favorability +20】

These numerical values were truly strange and bizarre, their increases and decreases completely without logic to speak of.

No matter what, today could be considered to have passed peacefully.

Yi Qiu’s mood lightened considerably. Yawning, she pulled up the 【Current Attributes】 to admire them for a bit. The growth of attributes always made one feel very at ease.

It was just that when she saw the 【You Yan Favorability】 column, her two eyes suddenly went black²⁹.

I’m angered to death! A whole string of operations as fierce as a tiger, and the favorability is still two hundred and fifty!³⁰

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