Little Alpaca – Chapter 3

Volume 1: Little Alpaca

Not Very Harmful, But Extremely Insulting!¹

For a moment, Yi Qiu’s little brain worked at lightning speed.

Yi Qiu remembered that in the early and middle stages of the novel 《Thin, Withered Branch²》, the author had described from various angles how much You Yan adored her alpaca. But in the later stages, it was also You Yan who personally slaughtered this alpaca, cooking its flesh and blood to please the blackened³ male lead. What was even more ridiculous was that just when everyone thought You Yan had developed real feelings for the male lead, the author, with a tap of their keyboard, had You Yan kill the male lead without any psychological burden.

Without a doubt, this was a villain who was extremely cold and unfeeling by nature, so cold that her world consisted only of playthings; all gains and losses were trivial to her.

No matter how rare a plaything was, if it got in the way, it could always be replaced. This had nothing to do with whether the plot had reached the point of a plot-mandated death⁴.

In order not to be replaced too early, Yi Qiu had to properly fulfill her duty as a “plaything,” which was to act like a normal alpaca.

A normal alpaca should be in its room eating grass at this time, not going out to forage.

But she had run out. Not only had she come out, but she had followed a fragrant scent, guided by the system’s prompt, and had the devil’s own luck to run right into You Yan, who was in the middle of refining poison…

As a scheming villain, this Demon Seed must be what You Yan was using to test if she was abnormal.

This alpaca’s body was simply too weak. She had nowhere to run and could only make a choice.

Time waits for no one. If she hesitated any longer, she wouldn’t even have the chance to act!

Death is certain if I don’t eat it, but I might live if I do—what if You Yan decides to save me?

The little alpaca blinked. She was panicking like crazy inside, yet she forced herself to act gluttonous, moving her little nose closer to sniff, then extending her pink tongue to lick the Demon Seed held between those slender fingertips.

The next second, the alpaca’s eyes lit up, and she took the Demon Seed into her mouth in one go.

The flavor that slowly dissolved in her mouth was as sweet as honey, yet Yi Qiu felt her limbs go terribly weak. A wave of despair washed over her, scaring her so much she could barely stay on her feet.

She didn’t dare to look at You Yan’s expression at all, focusing only on her performance as a normal, dumb alpaca, terrified that revealing the slightest flaw would get her killed on the spot.

But she waited and waited, waited until the Demon Seed had melted into liquid in her mouth, and she was stuck, not knowing whether to swallow or not. The dark-colored hem of the robe before her remained completely still.

You can’t be serious, are you really not going to save me?

The little alpaca raised her head, looking at her “master” with an expression of extreme innocence and immense hope.

But that “master” simply gave a faint smile after a brief moment of eye contact and reached out to pat Yi Qiu’s little head. This gentle pat actually carried a flow of spiritual energy, sending all the sugary liquid Yi Qiu was holding in her mouth straight down her throat.

Yi Qiu: !!!!!

The corners of You Yan’s lips curled up slightly as she conjured the porcelain bottle in her palm into her spirit pouch⁵.

Then, she leaned forward slightly, pushing off her knees to stand up. She casually straightened her wide sleeves, turned, and leisurely walked out of the bedchamber.

Yi Qiu’s breath caught. After coming to her senses, she was in such a panic that she scrambled after her with same-side feet, clumsily rushing to get in front of You Yan and nuzzling her little head against her thigh.

Nuzzling and nuzzling, seeing no reaction, she began running circles around her.

You Yan lowered her gaze with great interest, but she only stopped walking, showing no other reaction for a long time.

Unsure if the demonic poison in her body was taking effect, Yi Qiu felt her stomach start to hurt. Her limbs grew increasingly sore and weak, and her thin little legs began to tremble uncontrollably.

Her body’s adverse reaction made her anxious. She simply bit down on You Yan’s sleeve and plopped down on the ground, refusing to move.

“Mph! Mph~~~” Hey hey, that’s enough, you should save me now!

“Nnngh… wuuu…” An alpaca’s life is really on the line here!

Seeing the little creature’s anxious state, You Yan couldn’t help but chuckle. She squatted down and gently pulled her sleeve from Yi Qiu’s mouth.

“You really are a glutton.”

You Yan murmured, conjuring a white porcelain bottle in her palm. She took out a “Demon Seed” from it and offered it to Yi Qiu’s mouth.

The sweet aroma appeared again, but Yi Qiu was on the verge of a breakdown.

“For real? One wasn’t enough to kill me, you’re going for a second one?!”

“My life is over!”

In a moment of despair, Yi Qiu closed her eyes, but just before they shut, she happened to glimpse a line of small characters appearing on the porcelain bottle.

She couldn’t help but freeze, quickly opening her eyes to take a look.

——Small candy pellets refined from honey, loved by adults and children alike.

Candy pellets?!

Yi Qiu stared blankly, stiffly accepting the candy pellet into her mouth.

The taste was identical to the one she had just swallowed.

“It really is a candy pellet?” Yi Qiu was utterly astonished. “Then why does my stomach hurt?”

【You’re hungry.】

“But my legs went weak too!”

【A psychological effect.】

“I f#cking…” She sniffled, forcibly suppressing the urge to curse out the system. “I was nearly scared to death! If it was a candy pellet, why didn’t you tell me sooner!”

【Identification error. My deepest apologies.】

Yi Qiu: …

This system seems totally unreliable no matter how you look at it.

The little alpaca pouted, took a deep breath, and stood up from the floor.

She glanced around, feeling a bit lost for a moment, and stood on the spot letting out two “mph mph” sounds.

“Go back,” You Yan said to her.

Still shaken, Yi Qiu didn’t dare to move.

“Go back to your own room,” You Yan said again.

Even though she’d had quite a scare, she still remembered she was an alpaca that hadn’t gained sentience. A normal alpaca wouldn’t understand human speech.

So, she stood her ground and let out a “nngh,” pretending not to understand as she nonchalantly chewed on the sugar dregs in her mouth.

The consequence of this action was a swift kick to the butt from You Yan.

That kick gave her a feeling that could be summed up in one word—pain!

The noble foot of a Demon Lord⁶ was truly a pain that a Grass Mud Horse⁷ could not endure.

And just like that, with her tail between her legs and tears in her eyes, Yi Qiu hopped back to her room, whimpering.

The moment she entered the room, she saw the grass in her food bowl and remembered her empty stomach, feeling incredibly wronged.

She had gone out to forage for food, but not only did she not find any, she almost lost her life.

“I can’t stand this grievance…”

【Calculating values.】

“What values? Calculating what?”

【Intelligence +20】

Well, damn. Although I knew my Intelligence could increase, it’s still amazing to witness it firsthand.

【Strength +5】

【Agility +5】

【You Yan Favorability +50】

Watching these plus signs pop up one after another, Yi Qiu’s mood was, to say the least, extremely complicated.

You Yan Favorability +50.

It actually increased her favorability, so why did she still kick me?

Are all villains this unhinged?

【Health -25】

“Hold on!” Yi Qiu exclaimed in shock. “I just got kicked once, isn’t deducting this much health a bit too much?”

【It’s mainly due to your irregular diet, which is affecting your physical health.】

Yi Qiu: …

Deep breaths, deep breaths.

Eat. I have to eat first. If my health gets too low, I might die. My body is the capital for this revolution.

Yi Qiu backhanded… oh wait, back-footed the open door shut and reluctantly walked over to the food bowl full of grass, falling into a long, deep thought.

“Guu~ Guu~~~”

Her stomach was rumbling, but the grass wasn’t the least bit tempting.

Yi Qiu thought, I’m an alpaca now. An alpaca’s palate is different from a human’s. Maybe grass really is a delicacy to the me of today?

After much hesitation, she tentatively sucked a stalk into her mouth and began to chew slowly.

The little alpaca’s facial expression grew progressively number, and in the few seconds she spent chewing the grass, her eyes took on a look of utter despair.

Bleh!

She spat the grass out.

She was a human! Eating grass was something she really, really couldn’t do!

She wished so badly she could put this bowl of grass in a pot to boil. If she could just add a pinch of salt, maybe it wouldn’t be so hard to swallow.

After another long period of deep thought, Yi Qiu’s stomach protested twice more.

She had the system display her stats for a look. That Health value of 75 was exceptionally jarring; looking at it for even a second longer made her feel utterly miserable⁸.

Grass… Mud… Horse… Being alive is too damn hard!

“There’s no point in living.” Yi Qiu leaned against the wall and started spacing out, her limp posture infinitely approaching the Ge You slouch⁹.

Just as she was questioning her existence, the aroma of a cooked meal drifted in from under the door.

It’s human food!

Yi Qiu did a side roll and scrambled up from the floor, hopping over to the door in a few bounds. She nudged the door open with her body and poked her little head out.

A deep blue fabric brushed past her forehead. She dazedly lifted her head, only to see You Yan walk past her carrying an exquisite lunchbox. You Yan walked a few steps to the table and set it down.

Yi Qiu turned and chased after her into the room, craning her neck as far as it would go just to see what dishes were in the lunchbox.

You Yan took the dishes out from the lunchbox one by one: two meat and three vegetable dishes. The aroma was so enticing that the little alpaca’s mouth started watering.

Yi Qiu felt like her neck was about to snap from craning, yet she didn’t receive a single glance from You Yan.

You Yan sat down. She picked up her chopsticks and, right under the little alpaca’s expectant gaze, began to eat gracefully, bite by bite.

Yi Qiu took a deep breath, gritted her teeth, and raised her head as high as it could go.

“Don’t look at me with your nostrils,” You Yan said coolly.

“I may not be human, but you’re a real dog!” Yi Qiu cursed inwardly.

“Why haven’t you eaten anything today?” You Yan glanced at the grass-filled food bowl, a hint of a smile playing on her lips.

A single, breezy question. Not very harmful, but extremely insulting!

Yi Qiu was so furious her mind went blank, and she started stamping her feet on the spot.

【You Yan Favorability +10】

Yi Qiu: …

Damn it! This can raise her favorability too?! She’s mocking me!

【You Yan Favorability +10】

Damn it, damn it, damn it!

This villain, she really is the character I hated the most, most, most, most, MOST out of the entire novel!

Starving to death is death, being beaten to death is also death. Either way, it’s death. To hell with it, I’ll fight her!

Having lost her reason, Yi Qiu subconsciously looked around, as if searching for a handy weapon to fight this female demon lord to the death.

The next second, however, she realized she didn’t have any hands.

【You Yan Favorability +10】

After a brief moment of thought, she remembered the talent skill the system had activated for her.

The next second, a crazed, enigmatic smile spread across the little alpaca’s snout. She suddenly took a deep breath, her little head tilting back tactically.

Close eyes! Gather strength!

I’ll f#cking fight you to the end!

he~~tui!!!

【As this attack failed to break through the defense, damage dealt to target: 0.】

【You Yan Favorability +100】

Yi Qiu: ??????

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