Little Alpaca – Chapter 176

Volume 5: Tribulation of All Beings

I’m Serious!

“Yes, I’ve lived for too long and have too many memories. But in my heart, thousands of years of memories don’t weigh as much as you,” You Yan said, taking an involuntary half-step forward. “My entire life has been muddle-headed and ignorant. I felt no sense of accomplishment in anything I gained, no happiness in anything I did… Only after meeting you did I find a sliver of interest in life.”

“I…”

“Even if you forget the many things between us, I will surely remember them all.” You Yan’s tone was exceptionally certain, as if she had been wronged and wanted to explain herself clearly.

How could she have been wronged?

It was simply because Yi Qiu had casually remarked that someone who’d lived too long wouldn’t know how to be nostalgic, and now You Yan was trying to prove her wrong.

If this were the past, You Yan would have, at most, given a cold sneer, not even bothering to spare her a glance. How could she be so busy explaining herself now?

This reaction startled Yi Qiu a little. She suddenly felt that she couldn’t bear to listen to You Yan speak at all.

She couldn’t bear the bad words, and she couldn’t bear the good ones either.

This bird woman’s mouth truly was something magical. Whenever she opened it, she could render her speechless in just a few sentences.

Just like now, her moving words were so full of affection they almost sounded fake.

Yi Qiu subconsciously took two steps back, but her hands were still held tightly by You Yan. In that moment, forget her heart—she didn’t even know where to put her entire self.

“Alright, alright, I was wrong about you. You have a good memory, a very good one!” Yi Qiu said earnestly, sitting down nervously at the table.

You Yan chuckled softly and sat down beside Yi Qiu. She glanced around, her gaze finally landing on the folding screen used to block the view of the bed. “The screen has been changed, too.”

Yi Qiu followed You Yan’s gaze. The screen was indeed different from before. “The last time we were here, it was made of wood. Now it’s been replaced with paper.”

On the screen, a painting of a crane by the water was so vivid it seemed alive, adding a touch of elegance to the room.

“I still remember, the previous screen was carved with high mountains, heavy clouds, and a ten-thousand-zhang cliff…” You Yan said, seemingly unwilling to let Yi Qiu off the hook. She lowered her gaze and asked, “Do you still remember?”

“Of course I remember that!” Yi Qiu replied instinctively, but then she realized that what You Yan said didn’t quite match her own memory. She shook her head and corrected her, “Wrong, wrong, there were mountains and clouds on that screen, but there was no cliff!”

The moment she finished speaking, she heard You Yan’s soft laugh and instantly knew she’d been tricked again.

“Your memory is better than I imagined,” You Yan said, gently rubbing the back of Yi Qiu’s head.

“You’re teasing me again?” Yi Qiu frowned, pulling her hands back and crossing them over her chest. She turned her head away, feigning anger.

“I was wrong, don’t be angry,” You Yan said, gently nudging Yi Qiu’s arm with her elbow as if pleading for forgiveness. “I won’t do it again.”

Since when was the bird woman’s tone so gentle?

Yi Qiu, who had always been an expert at profiting and still acting innocent,¹ suddenly felt the urge to climb on her nose and onto her face.²

“I don’t believe you!” Yi Qiu said, biting her lip. Her little face was puffed up in a pretend pout, unwilling to yield an inch.

“Then what will it take for you to believe me?” You Yan grew a little anxious. She quickly stood up, walked around to kneel in front of Yi Qiu, and rested her hands on Yi Qiu’s crossed arms, looking up at her quietly.

That single look was enough to break Yi Qiu’s defense. She couldn’t hold it in any longer, and the corners of her pursed lips curled upward slightly.

“So you weren’t angry after all.” Seeing this, You Yan couldn’t help but reach out and poke Yi Qiu’s cheek. She frowned and said, “Were you trying to make me worry?”

“What? You’re allowed to tease me, but I’m not allowed to tease you back?” Yi Qiu retorted. She let out a self-righteous “hmph,” stood up, and ran to the window, pushing open one pane after another.

The guest room was large and had many windows. As she opened them all, the afternoon sunlight spilled into the room.

If this were the past, she would never have dared to open so many windows in front of You Yan.

You Yan smiled as she rose from the floor. She followed in Yi Qiu’s footsteps out the door and lifted her gaze toward the cliff on the opposite side.

Although the trees here had been burned away, the other side of the chasm still retained the appearance of a deep mountain.

Autumn had dyed the rolling mountain range the color of straw. A gentle breeze sent it all swaying.

“Is it beautiful?” Yi Qiu turned to look at You Yan beside her.

“This is a scene of withering and decay,”³ You Yan replied faintly.

“You can’t think of it like that,” Yi Qiu said. “They’re just about to fall asleep. When spring comes, they’ll wake up again.”

“But who knows how long we’ll have to wait for the next spring,” You Yan said softly.

Yi Qiu thought for a moment, then said, “You Yan, is the Demon Realm so barren and desolate because it has no sun and no seasons?”

You Yan pondered for a moment before nodding.

“The mortal realm has the Wood God to bring spring and the Jinwu⁴ to act as the sun. Why doesn’t the Demon Realm have corresponding demons?”

“The power of gods and demons is not the same,” You Yan said softly. “No matter how strong a demon’s power is, it can only be used for destruction. It’s fundamentally impossible to create something from nothing.⁵ But gods are different. Most of the things in this mortal world were created by them.”

“…That’s pretty unfair,” Yi Qiu said in a small voice.

You Yan chuckled and shook her head, her gaze fixed on the distance. “The mortal realm is better than the Demon Realm,” she said faintly.

Yi Qiu pursed her lips and muttered under her breath, “If one day, the Demon Realm could also grow plants like the mortal realm, and have a sun like the mortal realm…”

“How could such a day ever come?”

“Maybe it really could!” Yi Qiu said, hugging her knees as she sat on the ground, her gaze distant. “You Yan, in your heart… do you still hold any grudges?”

After a moment of silence, You Yan also sat down beside Yi Qiu.

She followed Yi Qiu’s gaze into the distance. After a long while, she finally answered softly, “What grudges?”

Yi Qiu asked cautiously, “Towards the Heavenly Realm, do you still hold any grudges?”

“It’s not a grudge, nor is it resentment…” You Yan said, closing her eyes and taking a deep breath before opening them again. “I just can’t stand them.”

“Your father…”

“That was all too long ago,” You Yan said. “What has kept me alive until now has never been hatred.”

She said that she had only ever wanted to see what kind of expressions that group of high up above⁶ figures would make if, one day, she managed to overturn heaven and earth⁷ in the Three Realms.

But she wasn’t interested in that anymore.

Hearing this, Yi Qiu raised her eyebrows and said softly, “If that’s the case, then anything is possible.”

“Hm?”

“Once everything is resolved, we’ll go back to the Demon Realm. When we do, we’ll borrow a sun from that little pig trotter!”⁸

“You can borrow that?”

“He managed to make ten of them, so what’s the big deal with giving us one?” Yi Qiu said, continuing, “Then we can also find Chao Yun and ask her to give us some of the mortal realm’s spring colors.”

You Yan couldn’t help but smile and shake her head.

“Don’t you laugh!” Yi Qiu grabbed her arm, shaking it back and forth in dissatisfaction. “I’m serious!”

“You’ve forgotten, gods and immortals from the Heavenly Realm cannot easily enter the Demon Realm,” You Yan said softly.

“There will be a way!” Yi Qiu said, repeating it in a small voice. “There will definitely be a way.”

“Didn’t you say that wherever I am is where you like to be? Why are you already thinking about turning the Demon Realm into a second mortal realm before we’ve even gone back?” You Yan teased.

Yi Qiu let out a long breath and said earnestly, “I wasn’t lying. Wherever you are is where I like to be. But I hope that the place where you are can be a beautiful one.”

After all, it took so much for You Yan to finally accept this beautiful mortal world.

She wanted to hold onto this beauty, to keep it by You Yan’s side forever.

You Yan was silent for a moment, then asked in return, “Then why don’t you let me stay in the mortal realm with you?”

Yi Qiu said in a small voice, “You are the Lord of the Demon Realm. You have your responsibilities. It’s already good enough that you can occasionally come out to see me. How could you stay here with me forever… Besides, if you wander the mortal realm for too long and are discovered by the Heavenly Realm, it would be dangerous…”

“That is true,” You Yan said, then couldn’t help but ask softly, “Then what about you?”

“Hm?”

“You’re not a person of this world. Are you truly willing to abandon everything from your former world for me?”

“I am,” Yi Qiu said softly. “I’ll follow you. I’ll follow you for the rest of my life. Even if I die and am burned to ash, fall into the earth and grow into a flower, I will still face you… Oof.”

You Yan flicked Yi Qiu’s forehead, frowning. “What kind of nonsense are you talking?”

“Anyway, anyway, I’m willing…”

Yi Qiu said, and smiled.

She was willing. Although she had hesitated and struggled in the past, she was now clear enough about what she truly wanted.

She wanted to be with You Yan, no matter where.

Even if everything suddenly started racing towards the original work’s ending, even if spring would never come again, the sun would never rise, and the mortal realm was left a barren wasteland.

Even if someone told her this was all just a dream.

She would rather die in that dream than return to a world without You Yan.

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