Little Alpaca – Chapter 117

Volume 3: Old Tales of Kunlun

The Illusory Realm of the Floating Dream Pearl.

The biggest joke in this world was none other than an insufferably arrogant bird woman confessing her love to her pet alpaca in a dream-like illusory realm.

And that little alpaca was a female one, at that.

As Yi Qiu thought about it, she couldn’t hold it in and let out a “pfft” of laughter, spraying You Yan’s face with spittle in the process.

You Yan subconsciously closed her eyes and leaned back slightly, wiping her face with the back of her hand. When she opened her eyes, the little alpaca had already collapsed to the ground, its fluffy head on its long neck rocking back and forth with laughter.

“Why are you laughing again? What are you laughing at?” You Yan couldn’t help but reach out with a clean finger and press it against the little alpaca’s forehead.

Instantly pinned by the force and unable to move, Yi Qiu had no choice but to suppress her laughter, her voice nearly trembling as she asked in return, “You Yan, do you even know what a married couple is?”

“It’s… it’s when two people like each other, and then they make a decision to be together for one lifetime and one generation from then on!” You Yan said, then after some serious thought, she added, “Yi Qiu, you said you would always stay by my side, so you must like me. You like me, and I like you, so why can’t we become a married couple?”

This incredibly naive tone made Yi Qiu shake her head.

What could this five-hundred-year-old little bird possibly understand about a lifetime?

Ever since she was born, she’s been raised without guidance. No matter where she went, she was driven out and ostracized. She could only learn everything by observing on her own. It’s only normal that she doesn’t understand love and hate.

Children don’t know any better and say reckless things, but an adult knows better and absolutely must not agree to them recklessly.

“You Yan, when it comes to matters of the heart, if marriage gets involved, it’s not as simple as you think,” Yi Qiu said seriously. “You can’t mistake companionship for liking someone, and even if you really do like them, you can’t treat that ‘like’ as love. After all, a person will like many people in their lifetime, but there’s only one they can truly spend their life with, or perhaps there won’t be any at all.”

“But… but I know you’re special.”

“How am I special?” Yi Qiu couldn’t help but mock herself. “Me? Aside from just eating and waiting for death¹, I can’t do anything and I don’t understand anything. How many people have you even met in your life? How could you have already decided on me?”

“…” You Yan unconsciously bit her lower lip.

“Little child, don’t go around easily promising someone a lifetime. What if they take you seriously? What would you do then?” the little alpaca continued, glancing up at the finger pressed on her forehead and pouting. “It kinda hurts when you press on me like that.”

You Yan quickly retracted her hand, lowering her gaze. “I’m sorry…”

Yi Qiu hurriedly explained, “I didn’t mean to blame you.”

As she spoke, she stood up and nuzzled her head against You Yan’s side. “You Yan, I wasn’t lying to you. I will always stay with you, so you don’t need to promise me anything just to keep me by your side… I’m just an alpaca. How could I be worthy of you promising your life to me²?”

As Yi Qiu spoke, she took half a step back, her eyes filled with delight.

Although she knew You Yan only said such things because she didn’t understand at all, hearing them still made her happy, one way or another.

After all, she now knew that this aojiao³ bird woman truly cared about her.

She suddenly longed to see what this little You Yan would look like grown up. Then she would gaze at that probably very sour, ice-block face, imitate little You Yan’s tone, and say to her, “Then I don’t want to be friends with you anymore! Let’s be a married couple too!” And after that, she absolutely couldn’t forget to twist the knife: “When you were little, how could you not even let a mere alpaca off the hook?”

At that moment, Yi Qiu thought, the expression on the bird woman’s face would surely be a sight to behold.

It was just like a top-tier⁴ superstar, who had spent years curating a noble, cold, and elegant intelligent persona, being caught by a minor black powder⁵ sticking their butt in the air while playing in the mud at home.

If that were her, she’d probably dig a hole and bury herself on the spot to avoid being ridiculed!

However, the bird woman was so thick-skinned⁶, she probably wouldn’t be so ashamed as to wish the earth would swallow her whole⁷.

Just as Yi Qiu was chuckling at her own thoughts, You Yan forcefully stuffed a small piece of biscuit into her mouth.

It probably wasn’t her imagination; You Yan’s feeding motions had become much more forceful.

What’s with her? Is she throwing a tantrum like an elementary schooler whose confession just got rejected?

Ah, forget it. Why should a modern person pushing thirty argue with a little bird who doesn’t understand anything?

Yi Qiu silently finished her breakfast, then saw You Yan take the bowl and spoon to the kitchen.

She followed her outside, wanting to bask in the morning sun, but her gaze subconsciously drifted to the tightly shut door across the way. On the steps outside that door, a half-eaten breakfast sat quietly.

What a strange bird, locking himself in his room from morning to night, not opening the door or the windows. Is he trying to grow mushrooms on his wings?

With this thought, the little alpaca subconsciously tiptoed over and asked softly, “Uncle, if you’re finished eating, I’ll take these to the kitchen.”

There was still no response from inside the room.

A morning breeze blew past, and Yi Qiu couldn’t help but shiver. She hurried forward, opened her mouth, and picked up the plate like a puppy.

On the round plate, besides the half-eaten biscuit, there was also half a bowl of congee. It was a bit heavy to carry with just her mouth.

The little alpaca couldn’t keep the plate balanced, and after just a few steps, the bowl slid off. Luckily, it was a wooden bowl and didn’t break, but the congee spilled all over the ground.

Yi Qiu froze for two seconds, then subconsciously glanced at You Yan washing dishes in the kitchen. Seeing that she hadn’t noticed the commotion, she quickly scurried back to her room and kicked the door shut with a hind leg.

“You’re an alpaca, you should just lie there quietly! Stop always trying to help, you’re more of a hindrance than a help⁸!”

As she grumbled to herself⁹, she began to worry.

Little You Yan was already in a bad mood. When she finished the dishes and came out to see the mess on the ground, wouldn’t she get even angrier?

Yi Qiu was fretting over this in her room, unaware that in the kitchen, You Yan, who had been in a poor mood, had caught a glimpse of the little alpaca fleeing in disarray¹⁰ out of the corner of her eye. She couldn’t help but shake her head and let out a soft, silent laugh.

She pondered for a moment, then lowered her gaze and wiped her wet hands on her skirt. Turning, she walked into the courtyard, bent down to pick up the plate, bowl, and spoon, and took them back to the kitchen. Then she returned to the courtyard, picked up a broom, and began to sweep up the spilled leftovers.

The bedroom window suddenly opened a tiny crack.

The little alpaca, with her front legs on a stool and her hind legs on tiptoe, was leaning against the windowsill, secretly peeking at You Yan outside. Seeing that she didn’t seem any angrier, she couldn’t help but sigh in relief.

She jumped down from the stool, kicked it back to the table with her front legs, and then lay down to think about how she would apologize later.

“I wanted to help you, but it’s not like I have hands, right?” No, no, that sounds too self-righteous.

“I wanted to help you, but halfway there, my teeth started to hurt.” Playing the victim might be a good way to evade responsibility.

Yes, that’s good. You Yan always says I’m delicate anyway, so this excuse for being a hindrance is plausible.

【Ding——】

The sudden sound gave the little alpaca a huge fright.

She subconsciously glanced around, and after confirming no one was there, she called up her attributes in her mind in utter astonishment.

Nothing’s changed. It’s still a bunch of question marks.

But she had clearly heard the system’s annoying voice just now. Was it just her imagination?

【System upgrade complete. Interference from the illusory realm has been successfully bypassed.】

It wasn’t an illusion, it was real! It was the mechanical girl’s voice she was so incredibly familiar with!

Her system was back!

“You, you you you… Baocai¹¹!”

【Present.】

She didn’t know if it was just her imagination, but for a moment, Yi Qiu found those two short words to be ridiculously dear to her.

“You, you’re back! Then… then why are my attributes still a bunch of question marks!”

【Apologies. The spiritual energy in this location is extremely chaotic, making numerical monitoring difficult.】

“Then can you answer questions?”

【If the Host has any questions, you may ask at any time. I shall speak of all I know and speak of it unreservedly.¹²】

Holy cow, that familiar feeling was back.

Yi Qiu thought for a moment and asked seriously, “First, what is this place?”

【This is the Illusory Realm of the Floating Dream Pearl. The Floating Dream Pearl is a magic treasure¹³ from the world of 《Thin, Withered Branch》, possessed by the Yi Bird, Yu Su. If a person is trapped within, they will be plunged into the most hopeless nightmare from the depths of their heart, repeatedly re-experiencing despair and pain, again and again.】

“The most hopeless nightmare… Then how can one wake up?”

【This requires awakening the dreamer’s own consciousness, but it cannot be done through overly forceful means, such as directly telling them this is a dreamscape. Otherwise, it is very easy to cause psychological damage.】

Unbelievable. It was just as she’d thought. To put it bluntly, she couldn’t let little You Yan start doubting her own bird-life.

Luckily, she hadn’t acted rashly earlier, or she really might have harmed You Yan.

“Then, what if she can never wake up?”

【All damage sustained within the illusory realm will inflict equivalent damage upon the soul of the person who entered it. If she can never wake up, the nightmare will repeat endlessly, and her soul will suffer continuous damage within the repeating nightmares until, in the end, her consciousness dissipates along with her shattered soul.】

That sounds way too serious!

“But this illusory realm doesn’t seem like a nightmare at all.”

【Does the Host recall You Yan mentioning “a mirror” to you?】

“Hm?”

【A mirror that caused her to completely fall to the demonic path.¹⁴】

Yi Qiu froze, her mind suddenly recalling some words—words You Yan had once said to her.

——For more than five hundred years on Kunlun Mountain¹⁵, I did nothing. I just tried hard, so hard, to live amidst everyone’s disgust, but even my very existence… was a mistake…

——On the day of the Queen Mother of the West’s¹⁶ birthday celebration, that group of immortal gods in the Heavenly Realm¹⁷ sentenced me to death, all because of a single mirror.

So, the Queen Mother of the West’s birthday celebration was a critical point in time, and also the beginning of You Yan’s nightmare.

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The author has something to say:

Baocai, after upgrading for over two months, has finally broken through the restrictions of the illusory realm and crawled back to piss Yi Qiu off.

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