I Am More Paranoid Than the Villain – Chapter 87

Sending Her Abroad

Goodbye, Shushu

Auntie He sensed that the atmosphere was off and silently returned to her bedroom.

Only the two of them were left in the living room.

“Shushu.” Shen Man called out softly.

As she spoke, she subconsciously controlled her breathing, as if afraid of startling the person before her.

Lin Shu looked up, her small, fair face expressionless.

Her eyes widened as she stared at Shen Man, and within those clean, pure eyes was undisguised disappointment.

“Shen Man, do you want me to go abroad?” she asked, her pearly white teeth practically chattering.

Shen Man lowered her gaze.

After a moment of silence, a hint of a smile appeared on her lips, and she spoke with a normal expression, “With Shushu’s abilities, going abroad is the best choice.”

“You want me to go abroad that badly!” Lin Shu shot to her feet, her voice rising.

Her emotions erupted in an instant. Glistening tears welled in her bright eyes, threatening to fall but never quite dropping.

Shen Man’s fingertips trembled slightly and slowly clenched at her sides.

Her lashes swept down as she averted her gaze, looking at a throw pillow on the sofa. “Isn’t going abroad a good thing?”

“Good! Yes, it’s great!” Lin Shu sneered, glaring at Shen Man. “So good that you’d collude with that little three¹, is that it?”

Hearing the hatred and anger in those words, Shen Man kept her eyes downcast and said nothing.

“Why aren’t you denying it?” Lin Shu roared in disappointment, tears falling uncontrollably. “I’ve always thought of you as the person I trust most. Why do you have to betray me, too?”

“Say something! Shen Man, tell me you have nothing to do with that woman, that you didn’t take her watch!” Each hoarse cry was like a desperate search for one last sliver of hope.

“She did indeed give me a watch,” Shen Man said, her expression calm.

Her fingertips dug into her own flesh, the pain traveling up to her heart, but she seemed to feel nothing at all.

Lin Shu stood frozen on the spot, the last shred of hope in her heart extinguished.

That sentence drained all the strength from her body. She collapsed onto the sofa, a sourness in her throat making it hard to breathe. Her lips trembled, unable to form a single word.

Shen Man quietly watched the young woman.

A trickle of blood seeped from her fingertips, held tightly in her palm.

“Get out! I don’t want to see you!” Lin Shu screamed, breaking down as large tears streamed down her face.

She hugged a throw pillow and buried her head in it, as if by doing so she could avoid facing what had just happened.

Shen Man’s heart clenched.

She took a slow breath, parted her lips, then closed them again before turning to go back to her room.

The sound of the young woman’s suppressed, despairing sobs came from the living room sofa, not stopping until the middle of the night.

Shen Man sat in her room, her usually calm eyes dull and lifeless.

Everything was proceeding according to her plan, but her heart felt none of the joy of devising strategies within a command tent²; instead, it felt as if it were being sliced again and again by a sharp little knife, sending out an indescribable pain.

She took a deep breath, trying to alleviate the ache in her heart, but it was useless.

‘Dong,’ came a knock on the door.

Shen Man instantly tensed up. After freezing for a few seconds, she stood and walked toward the door.

The moment her fingertips touched the doorknob, she realized her hand was shaking.

The door was slowly pulled open, revealing the young woman’s red, swollen eyes.

“Shushu, are you okay?” Shen Man asked, her voice extremely soft.

Lin Shu’s lips curled into a sneer. “What’s not to be okay about?”

“Thanks to you, I’ve already decided. I’m going abroad!” She glared at Shen Man, a sarcastic smile on her lips.

“Congratulations.” The words were a sour taste on Shen Man’s tongue. She forced a slight smile, struggling to squeeze them out.

Lin Shu stared intently at the face just inches away, but she couldn’t see the slightest hint of a plea to stay.

She let out a self-deprecating laugh, straightened her back, and proudly turned to leave.

Shen Man watched the young woman walk away, step by step, until her figure disappeared beyond the doorway.

She shifted her gaze to her own reddened fingertips, a pained smile touching her lips.

She had never won so miserably before.

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Lin Shu rested at home for two days.

The posts about her on the forum had been deleted without a trace, as if they had never existed.

Lin Huai went to the school to handle the procedures for her to study abroad.

The news spread quickly through the school.

The students discussed it animatedly, their words still laced with disdain and contempt for Lin Shu.

Xia Ke sat behind Shen Man and poked her in the back with a pen.

Shen Man turned around, her eyes asking the question.

“Manman, is Lin Shu really going abroad?” Xia Ke asked in a low voice.

Shen Man nodded, her expression as calm as ever.

Xia Ke propped her cheek on her hand, looking a bit reluctant to see her go. She sighed and said, “I thought I was the only one who would be leaving.”

“I was thinking I’d come back after I graduate, and we could all get together again. Now Lin Shu is leaving too. I wonder if she’ll come back after she graduates?” As she spoke, her eyes lit up. “Maybe I can go find Lin Shu and hang out with her abroad.”

Shen Man’s heart trembled.

After a pause, she said, “Maybe there won’t be a later.”

“Huh? What?” Xia Ke tilted her head in confusion. “Manman, what are you talking about? That’s so weird.”

“It’s nothing.” Shen Man gave a small laugh and turned back to organizing her notes.

After the last class ended, Shen Man drove home.

Standing at the front door, she felt a flicker of cowardice, a reluctance to open it.

After a moment’s pause, she opened the door and changed her shoes with a natural air.

The sound of the television came from the living room, accompanied by a young woman’s happy laughter, as if everything was the same as before.

Shen Man frowned in surprise.

Composing her expression, she walked over, looked at the young woman on the sofa, and said with a smile, “Shushu, what show are you watching?”

“Does it have anything to do with you?” Lin Shu glared, her eyes full of hostility.

After saying that, she ignored Shen Man and went back to watching TV.

Shen Man stood to the side, as if she were thin air.

Only a few steps separated them, yet it felt like an insurmountable wall stood between them.

She understood in her heart that what lay between her and Lin Shu was the difference between two worlds.

Shen Man walked into her room.

Lin Shu caught a glimpse of her disappearing figure, bit her lip in frustration, and threw the remote control.

She mentally warned herself not to cry, but tears welled up uncontrollably.

When Auntie He finished making dinner, she saw Lin Shu crying softly on the sofa and asked with concern, “Miss Lin, why are you crying?”

“I’m crying from watching TV,” Lin Shu answered loudly, her tone aggressive.

Auntie He knew it was a comedy and tactfully didn’t press the issue.

She walked to Shen Man’s room, knocked, and said, “Manman, come out for dinner.”

“Okay,” Shen Man said, opening the door and coming to sit in the living room.

Lin Shu wiped her tears and snorted disdainfully.

She got up, sat down, and looked over the dishes on the table before saying critically, “Why is it these dishes again?”

Auntie He’s heart skipped a beat, and she was just about to speak.

Shen Man cut in first, “Shushu, what do you want to eat? I’ll make it.”

“You? Forget it. I’d rather eat this.” Lin Shu pouted and picked up her chopsticks with a look of contempt.

Shen Man’s expression didn’t change. She got up, walked to the fridge, took out a fish, and said with a smile, “I’ll make some braised fish. It’ll be quick.”

Lin Shu didn’t say anything and began to eat.

When Shen Man came out with the cooked fish, she saw that the rice in the young woman’s bowl was already gone.

She paused for a second and said, “Shushu, let me get you some more rice.”

“No need.” Lin Shu refused coldly, looking up to stare at Shen Man. “What’s the use of being falsely kind at a time like this?”

“Can it change anything?” she said, laughing with a mix of anger and disappointment.

Shen Man was speechless. She slowly set down the fish platter.

Lin Shu stood up and returned to her room, her small face cold.

She sat on her bed, looking at the flight ticket information on her phone.

Nine o’clock tomorrow morning was her departure time, but she hadn’t told anyone.

Shen Man ate dinner without tasting a thing, then helped Auntie He with the dishes.

“Manman, Miss Lin has been emotionally unstable these past few days. I often see her crying in secret. You should try to comfort her more,” Auntie He said in a low voice.

Shen Man kept her eyes downcast, focusing intently on the plate in her hands.

Suddenly, with a ‘crash,’ the plate fell to the floor and shattered into several pieces.

She immediately crouched down to pick them up, but her finger accidentally brushed against a sharp edge, and a long cut opened up.

Blood slid down her finger, tracing a red line on her arm that looked somewhat startling to the eye and shocking to the heart³.

“Manman, are you okay? I’ll go get you a bandage,” Auntie He said, quickly walking to the living room to find alcohol and a bandage.

As she cleaned Shen Man’s wound, she couldn’t help but say, “Manman, you seem to have something on your mind lately. You’re always so absentminded.”

“I don’t,” Shen Man retorted, her tone flat.

“And you say you don’t. Look at you, you even hurt yourself just washing a dish.” Auntie He sighed, frowning. “Miss Lin is going abroad soon. I heard Director Lin is planning to let someone else live in this house. I don’t know if I’ll be able to keep working here.”

“You probably will,” Shen Man reassured her.

Auntie He smiled. “If Director Lin lets me go, I’ll just go back and take care of my daughter. But you, I’m afraid you’ll have to move back to the school dorms.”

“You don’t need to worry about me. I have my own plans,” Shen Man said, a calm resolve in her eyes.

“You’re a girl with her own ideas, more mature than others,” Auntie He praised with a smile. “Even after Miss Lin leaves, you’ll definitely be able to take good care of yourself.”

Hearing this, Shen Man’s heart clenched.

Looking at her now-bandaged hand, she stood up and said, “Thank you. I’m going back to my room.”

“Okay.” Auntie He smiled, then added after a thought, “Manman, don’t be too sad. Miss Lin will come back after she finishes her studies abroad.”

Shen Man didn’t reply, returning to her room with her eyes lowered.

On the calendar on her desk, a number was circled in red.

Tomorrow was the red-circled day.

Shen Man picked up the calendar and stared at the number for a long time.

She took out her phone and dialed her homeroom teacher. “Teacher, I’m not feeling well. I’d like to take a day off tomorrow.”

“Okay, take care of yourself,” the teacher said.

Shen Man put down her phone and tore the calendar into little pieces.

She lay on her bed, eyes open, staring into the pitch-black room until dawn.

---

The cheerful chirping of birds came from outside the window.

It wasn’t even five o’clock, but the sky was already bright.

Lin Shu got up and packed her luggage.

She glanced around the room, her gaze falling on a worn-out doll on the bed.

After a moment of silence, a sarcastic smile appeared on her face, and she simply packed a few items of clothing from her closet.

Lin Shu gathered the jewelry in her room and put it all into a large box.

Out of the corner of her eye, she glimpsed a photo album in a drawer. She froze, then picked up a photo.

It was a picture of her and Shen Man, taken together on her birthday.

Next to it was a sketchbook, a birthday gift from Shen Man.

Lin Shu still remembered the joy she felt upon receiving that gift, but now, what she felt more was sadness and pain.

She tore her gaze away and packed her other things.

She didn’t have much luggage to bring, and in less than an hour, Lin Shu had everything packed.

She sat on the edge of her bed, her eyes involuntarily drawn to the open closet.

After hesitating for a long time, Lin Shu stood up and quickly stuffed the photo and sketchbook into her backpack.

Then she zipped it up swiftly, as if to prevent herself from regretting it.

It was just six o’clock.

Lin Shu dragged her suitcase out of the room. Standing in the entryway, she glanced back at Shen Man’s room one last time before leaving with firm resolve.

Hearing the sound of the front door closing, Shen Man’s heart trembled.

She got up, opened her door, and saw Auntie He standing outside.

Auntie He was a little surprised, then said with a somewhat sad smile, “Manman, Miss Lin is gone.”

Shen Man hummed in acknowledgment, her expression as normal as ever.

Her eyes were as placid as still water, making it impossible to see her true thoughts.

“Manman, why don’t you go see Miss Lin off?” Auntie He suggested tentatively.

Shen Man shook her head. “I have something to do at school. I need to head over now.”

“Okay.” Auntie He nodded, a hint of worry in her eyes.

Watching Shen Man leave, she couldn’t help but say, “Manman, you don’t look so good. Maybe you should take a day off and rest.”

“No need,” Shen Man said, then finished changing her shoes and left.

She stood in the building’s hallway, saw that red car, and her eyes flickered. She took out her phone and called a car.

Shen Man left the residential complex through a different gate.

The car she had booked arrived just then.

“Where to, little lady?” the driver asked with a smile.

“The airport,” Shen Man said.

“Alright.” The driver nodded and said in a familiar-upon-arrival⁴ sort of way, “Little lady, what time is your flight? I’ll take a shortcut for you, guarantee we’ll get there in the shortest time possible.”

Shen Man didn’t answer the question. After a moment of thought, she asked the driver not to take the route Lin Shu would be taking.

The driver was puzzled. “Not taking that road means taking a detour. Aren’t you in a hurry?”

Shen Man turned her head to look out the window. “There’s enough time.”

The driver sensed that this passenger was a bit mysterious and reined in his chattiness, focusing on driving.

The airport was an hour’s drive from the complex. The driver was familiar with the route and got there in forty minutes.

Shen Man got out of the car.

Hiding in the crowd, she watched the direction where taxis arrived and dropped off passengers.

In less than five minutes, Lin Shu, carrying a backpack and pushing a suitcase, got out of a taxi.

There was no one beside her to see her off.

Lin Shu looked up, gazing ahead.

Shen Man subconsciously pulled back her gaze and ducked out of sight.

After waiting a moment, she peeked out again. The young woman’s figure appeared in front of her.

Shen Man quietly watched that figure walk further and further away, until it vanished from sight.

She lowered her eyes and let out a soft laugh as an indescribable pain bloomed in her heart.

“Goodbye, Shushu,” she whispered, her red lips forming the silent words.

Lin Shu stood at the entrance to the main hall, looking into the crowd, but she did not see that familiar figure.

She smiled self-deprecatingly, turned around, and followed the crowd forward.

Overnight, those round, determined eyes had matured a great deal.

The two of them headed in completely opposite directions.

As if their paths would never cross again.

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