I Am More Paranoid Than the Villain – Chapter 72

Being Cared For by Her

Do you really not remember anything?

Shen Man and Xia Ke were eating in the cafeteria.

A phone lying on the table suddenly lit up with a new message.

Shen Man glanced at it.

She only caught the sender’s name—Lin Shu—before she could even read the content, the message was withdrawn.

“Shen Man, this time I owe you one.” A moment later, another message came through from her.

Every word carried the haughty air of a rich young lady.

Shen Man smiled, set down her chopsticks, and typed: “Shushu, no need to stand on ceremony.”

She paused, then asked, “Are you feeling any better?”

“Mm.” After a long while, the other side replied with a single character.

Shen Man put the phone down and went on eating in a very good mood.

Seeing this, Xia Ke asked with a grin, “Manman, what’s the good news? You suddenly look so happy.”

“Do I?” Shen Man countered, a faint smile tugging at her lips.

Xia Ke nodded earnestly. “This morning you had a long face, like you were in a really bad mood.”

“I just didn’t sleep well,” Shen Man shot back at once, her tone light.

She lowered her head, picked up a bite of vegetables, and chewed slowly.

Xia Ke didn’t buy it.

She thought for a moment, leaned in, and lowered her voice. “Manman, are you in a bad mood today because of Lin Shu?”

Shen Man’s hand holding the chopsticks paused.

Very quickly, the smile returned to her face. She asked in her usual calm manner, “What makes you say that?”

“Instinct,” Xia Ke said, all mysterious.

“Don’t overthink it. There’s nothing between me and Lin Shu,” Shen Man said with a soft laugh, a shade of helplessness at being misunderstood in her voice.

“But you’re so good to Lin Shu—are you sure you don’t like her?” Xia Ke still didn’t believe it. She gazed at Shen Man with pleading eyes. “Manman, I always thought you liked Lin Shu.”

“Just like I like Ah Xu,” she added in a small voice.

Shen Man’s heart gave a tight squeeze.

As if she’d heard a funny joke, she covered the corner of her mouth and laughed. “Shushu is so cute. She really is easy to like.”

As she spoke, she met Xia Ke’s eyes. Her cool, clear gaze was utterly forthright. “You like Shushu too, don’t you?”

Xia Ke nodded.

Drawn into the topic without thinking, she smiled and said, “Lin Shu is really cute—proud like a cat, yet soft and delicate. She makes you want to hold her in your arms.”

“What do you think Yin Ruxu is like?” Shen Man followed up, taking an unhurried sip of soup.

At that, Xia Ke thought carefully for a moment. “Ah Xu is like a naive, innocent little rabbit—very timid, easily hurt. She makes you want to protect her and give her the best of everything.”

“If she cries even once, I’d give up everything I have to coax her smile back.”

“You really are a romantic innocent,” Shen Man said with a smile.

Xia Ke flushed, fussed shyly with the hair by her ear, and asked in a small voice, “Manman, is being an innocent romantic good or bad? Would Ah Xu like it?”

“I always feel I’m not romantic enough. Other than buying her things, I never know what else to do.” She propped her cheek in one hand and poured out her worries in a soft ramble.

Shen Man listened quietly.

When Xia Ke finished, she let out a long breath, as if expelling all the worry in her heart.

She laughed brightly. “Manman, talking to you really makes me feel better. I’m heading back to the dorm.”

Shen Man nodded.

As soon as Xia Ke left, the expression on her face cooled, a frost seeming to settle over it until only aloofness remained.

The lively chatter around her grated on her nerves for no reason at all.

She picked up her phone, lifted her tray, and walked to the return station without expression.

“Class monitor, are you done with lunch?” a girl asked as she came up.

Out of habit, Shen Man curved her lips in a standard smile. “I’ve already eaten. You?”

“I came late—just grabbing something quick,” the girl said, smiling.

Shen Man smiled and nodded, then headed out.

She wandered aimlessly around campus and finally stopped by the lake behind the library.

The water was crystal clear, reflecting the stern, cool planes of Shen Man’s face.

Laughter from nearby couples drifted over.

Shen Man looked over.

Young couples were wrapped in each other’s arms, trading sweet nothings that made them laugh out loud.

Or maybe, at their age, just being together was enough to make them happy—no need to think about the future, no need to worry about reality—just a simple, pure love.

Shen Man had always kept a respectful distance from love with no future.

She knew exactly how to plan each stage of her life and worked toward her goals.

She liked—and even enjoyed—the feeling of holding her life firmly in her hands.

Everyone who knew her admired the composure and calm that seemed far beyond her years.

She had always been a byword for security and elite strength.

But in that moment, deep down, she couldn’t deny a thin thread of envy.

That youthful purity was a beauty she’d never had.

Shen Man withdrew her gaze and looked quietly at the sunlit lake.

The ripples sparkled with golden light. A gust of wind came, and the little points of light swayed with it, jumping across the surface in a pleasing rhythm.

“Achoo…” Shen Man suddenly sneezed, goosebumps prickling on her arms.

Her head felt a little woozy.

She raised a hand to her forehead.

It seemed a bit hot—or maybe not.

Unable to tell, she got up and headed toward the classroom building.

After the afternoon classes,

Shen Man felt even more groggy.

“Manman, you don’t look well. What’s wrong?” Xia Ke asked with concern.

Shen Man gave a small smile. “I’m fine. Probably just too busy lately. I’ll be okay after some rest.”

“Being class monitor is pretty busy. Take care of yourself,” Xia Ke said.

Shen Man nodded and headed out with her backpack.

She drove back to her complex¹.

After parking, she leaned back against the seat and rubbed her brow hard.

She rested in the car for nearly ten minutes before opening the door.

Auntie He had already made dinner.

Hearing the door, she came to the entryway at once.

Seeing Shen Man’s listless look, she asked with concern, “Manman, what’s wrong?”

“I’m a little tired today. I’ll skip dinner,” Shen Man said, her tone more subdued than usual.

Still worried, Auntie He watched her head inside and couldn’t help adding, “Manman, how about some soup at least? A little food will perk you up.”

“No need,” Shen Man said, closing her bedroom door.

Summoning the last of her strength, she showered.

She lay down, and before long, drifted into a heavy, hazy sleep.

Auntie He brought the dishes to the table, then went to Lin Shu’s door and knocked. “Miss Lin, dinner’s ready.”

Lin Shu came out, glanced over the living room, and asked, “Where’s Shen Man? Didn’t she come back?”

“Manman’s not feeling well—she’s resting in her room,” Auntie He said.

“What’s wrong with her?” Lin Shu asked, looking toward Shen Man’s door.

“Probably just tired,” Auntie He said. “Miss Lin, you eat first.”

“Go check on Manman after you finish.”

“Why should I check on her?” Lin Shu said with an air of pride, looking away as she headed for the living room.

“Yesterday Manman took care of you; rites esteem reciprocity². Miss Lin, you should show a little care for Manman today,” Auntie He murmured.

“Got it,” Lin Shu said as she sat down, a trace of impatience in her voice.

Auntie He said no more, filled a bowl of rice, and handed it to Lin Shu.

Looking at the brimming bowl, Lin Shu frowned. “I can’t eat that much. Pour half back.”

Auntie He did as told, scooping out half.

“A bit more,” Lin Shu said.

Auntie He scooped again. Only a small mound of rice remained—two or three bites at most.

“Okay, give it here,” Lin Shu said, taking the bowl and chopsticks and lowering her head to eat.

She didn’t eat quickly—just as usual.

Auntie He took a look and went back to the kitchen.

Lin Shu looked back at Shen Man’s door, her fine brows lightly knit.

She quickly finished the rice in her bowl, took a sip of soup, swallowed, and dabbed her lips with a napkin.

She straightened her clothes, stood, and walked slowly to Shen Man’s room.

“Shen Man, what are you doing?” Lin Shu knocked and called out loudly.

Hearing the voice, Shen Man forced her eyes open.

She felt like she’d slept a long time—or maybe just dozed for a bit.

“Shen Man, open the door!” Lin Shu’s proud, energetic voice came from outside.

Shen Man closed her eyes for two seconds, then opened them again and pushed herself up.

A wave of dizziness hit; her legs went weak and nearly gave out. She managed to steady herself against the bedside.

Kneeling on the edge of the bed, she marshaled her strength to stand.

She moved to the door, leaned against the wall, and cracked it open.

A youthful, lively face peeked in, all inviting energy and brightness.

Lin Shu reached out and pushed the door open.

The dimness inside made her squint.

“Shen Man, it’s so early—why are you sleeping? You didn’t even turn on the light,” Lin Shu complained, flipping the switch.

She turned her head toward Shen Man—and froze at the sight of that bloodless face.

“Ah…” Lin Shu jumped and frowned. “Why is your face so pale?”

“I’m fine,” Shen Man said, her voice weak and breathy.

“Fine? You look sickly,” Lin Shu barked, concern surfacing despite herself. Awkwardly, she added, “Since you took care of me yesterday, I’ll take care of you today. Then we’ll be even.”

At that, Shen Man’s lips quirked, as if she meant to smile.

But her lips barely moved. A soft chuckle slipped from her throat instead.

“What are you laughing at?” Lin Shu demanded, bracing Shen Man by the arm.

“Nothing,” Shen Man murmured, lashes down, half her weight sinking against Lin Shu.

Thrown off balance, Lin Shu teetered to the side.

Sensing danger, Shen Man quickly grabbed Lin Shu’s arm and drew her into her embrace.

“Ah…” Lin Shu yelped and fell against Shen Man.

The impact pushed Shen Man backward.

Any other time, Shen Man would have caught Lin Shu without effort.

But she was weak now, barely steady herself, and toppled backward onto the bed.

They fell together in a close tangle.

Their foreheads bumped with a—BANG!—

in the quiet room.

Shen Man’s fine brows pinched. Looking at the girl’s delicate face, she asked softly, “Shushu, are you okay?”

“It hurts…” Lin Shu puffed out her cheeks and rubbed her forehead.

Her eyes welled, and she glared at Shen Man.

Shen Man turned her head,

coughed once, and a flicker of pain crossed her pale features.

Lin Shu’s rebuke died on her lips.

She grumbled twice under her breath, then asked in a soft, syrupy voice, “Are you okay?”

“I’m fine.” Shen Man’s lips lifted. After a moment, she said, “Shushu, get up first.”

Obediently, Lin Shu sat up, still kneading the sore spot.

Her cheeks puffed; her little face was full of grievance.

Shen Man pushed herself upright.

With long fingers covering her lips, she coughed twice and said, “Shushu, you don’t need to look after me. I’ll be fine after a nap.”

“No,” Lin Shu refused flatly.

Seeing Shen Man’s puzzled, slightly surprised look, she hurried to explain, “If I don’t take care of you, Auntie He will scold me.”

“Lie down,” she said, taking the quilt to pull over Shen Man.

Shen Man raised her head to stop her, a hint of helplessness between her brows. “Shushu, help me sit up first.”

“Oh.” Lin Shu carefully took her arm. “Go slow. Don’t flop down all sickly like just now.”

Shen Man paused.

She thought of protesting, but when the words reached her lips, she didn’t bother.

She leaned back against the headboard, eyes half-closed, that cool, beautiful face touched now with fragile weakness.

Lin Shu lifted the quilt and tucked it carefully around Shen Man.

Looking at that pale face, she couldn’t help saying, “If you’re not feeling well, just rest. What are you trying to prove, going to class?”

“You said you’d get me a leave. I think the one who should’ve taken a leave is you.”

Though her words sounded scolding, concern shone in her round eyes.

She sat beside the bed, pouted, and stared steadily at the woman lying there.

Shen Man’s fingers lay on the quilt; the index finger of her right hand tapped lightly.

She gave a faint, tired smile. “Shushu, I’ve made you worry.”

“I’m not worried about you,” Lin Shu shot back loudly.

Realizing she was a bit too worked up, she paused and added, “Auntie He is the one worried about you. I’m just paying back what I owed yesterday.”

Shen Man chuckled and looked at the faint flush on the girl’s cheeks.

After a moment’s thought, she took that tender little hand and said slowly, “Yesterday, you fell asleep holding my hand just like this.”

Lin Shu started.

She meant to pull her hand back. But meeting that gentle smile, she lost focus for a beat.

Coming back to herself, she lowered her head to look at her toes. “Anyway, I don’t remember. Whatever you say it was, it was.”

At that, Shen Man’s smile faded.

Her eyes darkened, and her fingertips stroked the soft pads of the girl’s fingers.

It tickled.

Lin Shu looked up—and met a pair of ink-dark eyes.

Her heart skipped. She shrank the tiniest bit and looked away. “Why are you looking at me like that?”

“Shushu, do you really not remember anything?” Shen Man asked with a soft laugh.

“Of course not,” Lin Shu declared, loud and imperious. “If Auntie He hadn’t told me you took care of me yesterday, I wouldn’t have known.”

She widened her eyes and stared straight at Shen Man, pride written all over her face.

Shen Man gazed intently at the girl’s delicate brows and eyes.

After a moment, her expression softened. She smiled. “Thank you for taking care of me, Shushu.”

“As long as you know,” Lin Shu sniffed, proud as ever. She reached out to cover Shen Man’s eyes. “Now be good and go to sleep.”

“Once you’re asleep, I can leave.”

Shen Man blinked.

Her long, thick lashes brushed the girl’s soft palm, like a teasing tickle.

Lin Shu couldn’t help laughing.

She shot Shen Man a glare, pulled her hand back, and lifted it to her lips to blow gently.

“I can’t sleep,” Shen Man said, tilting her head just a little.

Her voice was thin, and paired with that delicate look, it felt almost like a plea.

Lin Shu’s heart thumped hard.

The phrase sickly beauty³ flashed through her mind—there was no better way to describe Shen Man at this moment.

Ordinarily, Shen Man was sharp and composed, her smile always carrying calm self-possession.

Compared to the immaturity and impulsiveness of their peers, she exuded a mature steadiness that made others feel both inferior and irresistibly drawn to her.

Now, the weakness in her brows and eyes had softened that usual edge.

It even made her a little bit cute.

Secretly pleased, Lin Shu arched a brow. “Then what do you want?”

Her tone was firm, as if she were impatient.

“My stomach’s a little empty. I want some soup,” Shen Man said with a gentle laugh.

“I’ll get you a bowl,” Lin Shu said, adopting a big-sister air. Then, in a show of faux maturity, she patted Shen Man’s head. “Be good, no fussing.”

Shen Man’s brows knit on reflex.

A chill flickered in her eyes—but in a moment it passed, and her expression returned to normal.

Lin Shu stood, a happy smile on her face.

At the door, she looked back as if instructing a child. “Don’t move around. I’ll be right back.”

Watching the girl’s retreating figure, Shen Man’s gaze was calm.

She was long used to giving orders from the top, whether at work or in life—she was always the strong one.

Being cared for like some helpless weakling by a little girl—on a psychological level, she resisted it.

But she didn’t dislike it.

Shen Man sighed softly.

Her lips curved with a touch of self-mockery and amusement.

She closed her eyes—and a rich fragrance teased her nose.

Chicken soup.

Carrying a tray, Lin Shu kept her eyes on the bowl.

She took careful, tiny steps, finally reached the bed, let out a breath, and sat down slowly. “Shen Man, Auntie He just ladled this from the pot. She said you should drink it while it’s hot.”

Shen Man looked at the nearly brimming bowl. “Where’s the spoon?”

“Spoon?” Lin Shu blinked, then realized a beat later. “Auntie He didn’t give me one.”

“How am I supposed to drink without a spoon?” Shen Man said, a bit helpless—the little thread of expectation in her heart vanishing.

“I’ll go get it.” Lin Shu set the soup carefully on the bedside cabinet and dashed out.

In no time, Lin Shu ran back in with a spoon.

She handed it over with a smile. “Drink up.”

Shen Man took the spoon and tried to lift the bowl with one hand.

The instant her fingers touched the porcelain, she flinched from the heat.

Lin Shu started. “Too hot?”

“Mm.” Shen Man pinched her earlobe between her fingers, the scald still tingling on her skin.

“I’ll blow on it for you,” Lin Shu said, catching Shen Man’s fingers and bringing them to her lips to blow gently.

Shen Man froze for a second. Looking at the girl’s earnest little face, she felt something stir inside.

She couldn’t deny it—she really was being cared for.

“Does it still hurt?” Lin Shu asked, then huffed another breath.

“It doesn’t,” Shen Man said with a small laugh, a touch awkward as she drew her hand back.

Only then did Lin Shu realize what she’d just done. Her cheeks pinked, and she turned her head away.

The air turned subtly awkward.

Holding the spoon, Shen Man said softly, “Shushu, put the soup back on the tray and bring it over again.”

“Okay,” Lin Shu murmured, head down.

She carefully set the bowl on the tray, then placed it in front of Shen Man with slow, deliberate movements.

“That’s good,” Shen Man said.

Lin Shu finally let go and sat obediently at the side.

Shen Man dipped a spoonful and sipped slowly.

The savory warmth spread down her throat, soothing and comforting, chasing away some of the gloom in her chest.

“Is it good?” Lin Shu asked, curious, eyes fixed on Shen Man’s lips.

As Shen Man pressed her lips together, Lin Shu couldn’t help swallowing.

A soft gulp sounded.

Shen Man glanced aside—

and saw open yearning in the girl’s eyes.

After a second’s thought, she scooped a spoonful and held it to Lin Shu’s lips. “Taste.”

Lin Shu didn’t hesitate. She sipped and beamed. “So fresh.”

“You didn’t drink any just now?” Shen Man asked.

Lin Shu froze.

She’d only rushed a few bites of food and hadn’t even noticed the soup.

She blurted, “It wasn’t done just now.”

Shen Man didn’t believe that for a second.

She didn’t call out the lie. Instead, she smiled gently. “Shushu, I’m feeling much better. You don’t need to trouble yourself here.”

“Then hurry and lie down and sleep,” Lin Shu said sternly, like a teacher scolding a student.

She set the soup and tray aside, lifted the quilt over Shen Man’s shoulders—

and, seeing both of Shen Man’s hands outside the covers, scolded at once, “Hands go under the blanket when you sleep.”

She took Shen Man’s hands and tucked them in.

Shen Man never resisted, not once.

Those calm eyes watched the girl’s every move in silence.

“Now close your eyes and go to sleep,” Lin Shu said, patting the quilt with a stiff, coaxing cadence.

Looking at that deliberately grown-up little face, Shen Man’s lips curved. “Thank you, Shushu.”

Lin Shu pressed her lips together in proud satisfaction, though a smile bloomed on her face.

She kept herself in check, forcing her expression to stay stern. “No talking. Close your eyes.”

Obediently, Shen Man shut her eyes.

Lin Shu sat beside her, keeping watch.

After a while, she asked, “Are you asleep yet?”

Shen Man couldn’t help laughing. Her long lashes fluttered.

Flustered, Lin Shu realized she’d asked the wrong question. Puffing her cheeks, she said, “No laughing. Focus on sleeping.”

Shen Man smoothed her expression into peaceful calm.

Lin Shu watched for a while, and her own mood settled.

Propping her cheek in her hand, she stared without blinking. Before long, her lids grew heavy, veiling the light in her eyes.

When the steady sound of breathing rose beside her, Shen Man opened her eyes.

Looking at the girl’s rosy, soft cheeks, she smiled.

Moving with care, she got up, took a thin throw from the wardrobe, and draped it gently over Lin Shu.

“Mm…” Lin Shu turned her head, let out a tiny whimper, and slept on.

Shen Man stepped out of the room.

In the living room, she filled her cup with water.

Hearing movement, Auntie He came out. Seeing it was Shen Man, she smiled with relief. “Manman, are you feeling better?”

“Much better,” Shen Man said with a small smile.

“Where’s Miss Lin?” Auntie He asked.

“In my room—she was tired and fell asleep,” Shen Man said, her voice turning soft.

Auntie He laughed at once. “Manman, Miss Lin cares about you. As soon as she heard you weren’t well, she barely ate and went straight to look after you.”

“She’s a pampered young lady—she’s never taken care of anyone. I said I’d go, but she insisted on doing it herself.”

Shen Man’s heart gave a jolt at that.

Her expression didn’t change. She smiled. “She’s paying me back for yesterday.”

Auntie He started to argue.

But seeing Shen Man turn away, she swallowed the words and sighed helplessly.

Young people—so stubborn, both of them.

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