Ha, Karma! – Chapter 57

Thank you, our kind superstar.

Fu Lianxue sat on the chair without speaking, utterly astonished.

Her feelings for Chu Zhaoqiu had actually begun far earlier than she’d thought, traceable all the way back to when Chu Zhaoqiu was still just a sect disciple!

No wonder she couldn’t detect any change in her heartbeat now; the person she had fallen for a thousand years ago hadn’t changed from beginning to end.

For a moment, she didn’t know whether to praise her own ridiculously long-lasting devotion¹ or cry out at how absurd fate was for arranging things like this.

How could she have fallen for Chu Zhaoqiu’s sullen face² from thousands of years ago?

How could she have fallen for a human when she clearly knew it would lead nowhere?

And how could she remain fixated³ on someone who had stabbed her with a sword and driven her away??

But she had indeed done just that.

Hadn’t she searched for Chu Zhaoqiu countless times in the vast sea of people just to ask her one question?

Wasn’t that also a form of fixation?

Fu Lianxue slowly lowered her head, frustratedly scratching her hair. Astonishment lingered in her wide, beautiful eyes.

But when this “fixation” involved romantic feelings, everything became chaotic.

She had thought there would be no romantic entanglement between them, she had thought she only hated her and wanted to find her to ask a question, she had thought…

It turned out that all these myriad “thoughts” had been mixed with a dose of selfish desire.

She couldn’t even bring herself to push Chu Zhaoqiu away.

Her mind was full of Chu Zhaoqiu’s good qualities, of Chu Zhaoqiu herself.

Just moments ago, she had even been worried that Chu Zhaoqiu wouldn’t come tomorrow.

The hate was real, the resentment was real, but the affection was also real.

But Chu Zhaoqiu hadn’t recovered her memories yet…

If Chu Zhaoqiu recovered her memories and discovered that the yaoguai she had driven away actually liked her, that expression… unimaginable.

Fu Lianxue suddenly felt grief-stricken and silently covered her face.

She had originally wanted to laugh at Chu Zhaoqiu when her memories returned, but now Chu Zhaoqiu was going to be laughing at her instead!

Why did Old Heaven have to be so cruel to her!

She lowered her hands and slumped onto the chair, utterly devoid of hope⁴, looking desolate and utterly miserable.

Most importantly, her mind was now a complete mess⁵, and she had absolutely no idea how to handle this relationship…

Qu Airu silently watched Fu Lianxue go through the entire process of “melancholy, breakdown, utter despair” all by herself in the chair.

She expressed her lack of understanding regarding this.

What was wrong???

The next day, having no work, Fu Lianxue slept in at home again.

She had worked too much these past few days, so she seized every opportunity to catch up on sleep.

After sleeping for an unknown amount of time, she groggily opened her eyes.

She had slept very well today; no doorbell ringing, and Baobao hadn’t come to bite her hair and bother her.

Eyes still heavy with sleep, she glanced towards the balcony.

Subdued light filtered through the light gray curtains into the room, casting a hazy grayness, not the brightness she had expected.

Her eyes instantly widened, and she sat up abruptly.

“Holy crap⁶, it’s evening already?!”

Usually, she slept until noon at the latest; how had she slept straight through to dusk now!

No wonder Baobao hadn’t come to nuzzle her; it had probably come by already, but she hadn’t woken up!

Just then, a gentle voice came from the doorway: “It’s not evening yet. The weather’s just bad; it’s about to rain.”

Fu Lianxue froze for a moment, instinctively looking towards the door.

She saw the woman who had been troubling her for days now walking towards her, holding her cat, her beautiful eyes filled with an indescribable tenderness.

Chu Zhaoqiu sat down gently on the edge of her bed, just as always.

“It’s noon now.”

She was acting as her time reminder again.

Fu Lianxue glanced at the kitty swishing its tail back and forth in her arms.

No wonder Baobao hadn’t come to disturb her sleep. Someone had been playing with it, keeping it from bothering Mama…

Chu Zhaoqiu put Baobao down and said softly, “If you’re awake, get up and eat.”

Fu Lianxue: “…”

She avoided Chu Zhaoqiu’s gaze, suddenly unsure how to face her.

Then, she yanked the blanket over herself, wrapping herself up, quickly lay back down, and mumbled muffledly⁷, “Not awake!”

Seeing Mama suddenly hide, Baobao opened its mouth and meowed twice, seemingly puzzled.

Chu Zhaoqiu smiled and stroked its head, then turned back to look at the “big zongzi”⁸ on the bed.

Today, she unusually didn’t urge her to get up and eat.

“Have you been very tired from work these past few days?”

A sound came from under the blanket: “Mm.”

Although she didn’t know how to face her, she answered when asked.

After she responded, she felt a hand land on the blanket, stroking it gently twice, as if soothing her.

Chu Zhaoqiu’s voice followed, reaching her ears: “You’ve worked hard.”⁹

“…” Fu Lianxue was momentarily speechless.

Silence suddenly fell between them.

The sound of the wind outside suddenly became clear, followed by the sound of rain, pattering down, starting abruptly just like that.

Then, amidst the downpour filling the sky, came flashes of lightning and rumbles of thunder¹⁰.

“Rumble—”

Fu Lianxue was caught off guard and startled.

Almost simultaneously, the hand landed on her again, and a voice full of concern asked, “Are you afraid of thunder?”

“Hardly,” Fu Lianxue said dismissively. “I’m such a great yaoguai, why would I be afraid of this?”

“Then are you afraid of seeing me?” Chu Zhaoqiu changed the subject¹¹.

“…” Fu Lianxue was rendered speechless.

Chu Zhaoqiu looked at the yaoguai hiding under the blanket, refusing to come out. A trace of irresolvable sadness surfaced in her downcast eyes.

“Lianxue, it seems like you don’t want to see me.”

Fu Lianxue shot out from under the covers: “I don’t!”

Realizing she seemed overly agitated, she averted her gaze, lowered her voice, and slowly retreated back under the blanket, saying as she went, “I don’t, don’t talk nonsense.”

How could she not want to see her?

She just didn’t know how to face her, didn’t know how to face this heart of hers…

Just as she was about to disappear completely, she saw Chu Zhaoqiu’s eyes curve happily: “It’s good that you don’t.”

She immediately shrank back in, hiding herself securely.

Chu Zhaoqiu looked at this yaoguai acting like a turtle pulling its head into its shell¹², and couldn’t help but move a little closer.

“Lianxue, no matter what happens, don’t push me away, don’t hide from me, okay?”

“We only just managed to meet again after so much difficulty. If we separate, who knows when we’ll be able to see each other again.”

Hearing this, Fu Lianxue suddenly threw off the blanket, moved close to her, and said, both fiercely and aggrievedly, “You were the one who drove me away back then!”

She still remembered the image of the person before her holding that sword, telling her to leave.

That was the first time Chu Zhaoqiu had been so harsh with her, the first time she had ordered her to leave, the first time she had hurt her, and also the first time Fu Lianxue had been so heartbroken.

She couldn’t help but think, she really did like her; otherwise, why would she have been so heartbroken over this matter?

After her outburst, Fu Lianxue deflated again. Before Chu Zhaoqiu could speak, she waved her hand dismissively, preparing to retreat back into the blanket: “Forget it, I won’t hold it against you. Besides, I was going to leave back then anyway…”

She might not hold it against her, but Chu Zhaoqiu couldn’t help but care about this matter now.

She grabbed Fu Lianxue’s wrist, her gaze burning as she looked into her eyes: “What do you mean? Why were you going to leave back then?”

Fu Lianxue saw her confused expression, raised a hand, and poked her, saying, “Young Master Chu, if I hadn’t left, I would have been driven out by you people! That place of yours couldn’t tolerate me!”

After she finished speaking, the confusion and bewilderment on Chu Zhaoqiu’s face deepened, as if she couldn’t find any corresponding memory in her mind.

She shook her head. This was actually normal; after all, her memories hadn’t returned. It would be a miracle¹³ if she could find them!

Fu Lianxue huffed, turned, scooped up Baobao, and hid with him under the blanket, playing the turtle in its shell again.

Chu Zhaoqiu thought for a long while but couldn’t figure it out.

She looked again at the “big zongzi” on the bed and decided to stop thinking about it. Grasping the present moment was the most important thing.

“Then don’t leave now, okay?” Chu Zhaoqiu promised earnestly. “I guarantee that the things that made you unhappy in the past will never happen again.”

The yaoguai under the blanket remained silent.

“Lianxue…”

A soft call, almost pleading, filled with helplessness.

Fu Lianxue was slightly moved.

A moment later, a cat emerged from under the blanket, followed by Fu Lianxue’s voice: “Chu Zhaoqiu, we still have many scores to settle. I won’t leave.”

“Right now, I just… I just don’t know how to deal with this.”

In every minute and every second of the past, she had never thought she would like Chu Zhaoqiu, let alone like her for so long.

When the truth hit her¹⁴, she could no longer avoid it.

Unable to escape, yet unwilling to admit it… at least not now.

She buried her face even lower, her voice muffled, sounding troubled and also awkward:

“So, you can’t force me to make any decisions right now… and you can’t hold any expectations for me!”

“You can’t force things, you can’t influence my decisions. We’ll just live as we live.”

“In short, I haven’t admitted that I like you, understand?!”

She hated it when others had excessive expectations of her.

If things went contrary to expectations, no one would be happy.

After she listed her conditions one by one, she heard Chu Zhaoqiu’s voice from outside the blanket, her gentle tone carrying a breath of reassurance¹⁵: “Mm, I understand.”

Curious, she lifted the blanket to look and actually saw Chu Zhaoqiu smiling.

She was smiling very, very happily, as if she had found a priceless treasure.

“What are you smiling about?”

“I’m happy that I could meet you, that I can talk with you calmly¹⁶.”

“Tch, you have no prospects.”

Fu Lianxue acted awkwardly tsundere for a moment, then shrank back into the blanket.

Chu Zhaoqiu was still very happy.

The yaoguai she liked liked her back; the yaoguai she liked was very cute. Just thinking about it was enough to keep her mood good all day long.

There was one more thing: they hadn’t eaten yet.

“Alright, Lianxue, since you’re awake, don’t go back to sleep. Get up and eat first. I’ll eat with you.”

“Not eating!” Fu Lianxue deliberately sang a different tune. “I don’t want to eat with you!”

Hearing this, Chu Zhaoqiu wasn’t angry or annoyed, and went along with her words: “Alright then, I’ll go home first to eat, and you can get up and eat by yourself later?”

Then she turned her head, glanced at the balcony, and remarked sighingly, “This rain is getting heavier and heavier…”

The rain outside was coming fiercely; the pattering sound had now orchestrated itself into a downpour, striking relentlessly against one’s heartstrings.

“Wait!” Fu Lianxue called out.

Then, a hand reached out from under the blanket, fumbling around until it found Chu Zhaoqiu’s hand.

Chu Zhaoqiu looked down as the hand shrank back slightly, then carefully extended one finger to gently hook one of hers.

Like a little kitten playing with someone.

“I’m not that bad a yaoguai. Since it’s raining so hard… you might as well stay for a meal. You can leave later.”

The corners of Chu Zhaoqiu’s lips lifted slightly, and her face immediately bloomed into a smile like a flower.

Regardless of the future, regardless of what decision Fu Lianxue might make, regardless of whether they could be together, at least in this moment, she hadn’t driven her away.

They were right beside each other.

She gently held Fu Lianxue’s fingertips.

“Thank you, our kind superstar.”

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