Ha, Karma! – Chapter 38

I must go, I must bring her home.

With Fu Lianxue here, Qu Xinru felt more confident.

She crawled up from the ground, covered her chest while coughing twice, and was about to speak of the past to help Chu Zhaoqiu remember her, when she recalled that Cen Zhu was still standing outside.

She couldn’t help but turn to look.

Cen Zhu was hurriedly walking inside.

She panicked and hastily hid behind Fu Lianxue, too afraid to face Cen Zhu or be discovered by her.

“Xinru, what—”

“I’m not! I’m not Xiaoru! I don’t know you!”

Cen Zhu froze.

Fu Lianxue turned her head to look at Qu Xinru, who was tightly clutching her clothes, trying to hide her entire self.

In the silence, she seemed to understand something.

She turned back to face Cen Zhu.

“Little one, it’s dark here, don’t go around mistaking people.”

“I wouldn’t mistake Xiaoru.”

Cen Zhu’s expression was firm, her gaze bright.

“And I wouldn’t mistake you.”

Fu Lianxue, Qu Xinru’s favorite singer.

What surprised her was that she wasn’t just an ordinary person, and had even saved Xiaoru.

She had just heard Qu Xinru call Fu Lianxue “My Lady”.

It was a form of address that didn’t fit this era yet showed clear familiarity—they must have known each other from before.

After Cen Zhu finished speaking, Fu Lianxue felt the little one behind her hide even more intensely.

Qu Xinru clearly didn’t want to see Cen Zhu.

She also didn’t want to see Cen Zhu—if outsiders didn’t have to see her, then better not to be seen.

Fu Lianxue began to cover her ears while stealing a bell [掩耳盜鈴 | yǎn ěr dào líng | idiom meaning to deceiving oneself]: “You don’t know me.”

Cen Zhu remained honest: “I do know you.”

Fu Lianxue slowly raised two fingers, a demonic light flashing in her eyes: “I said, you don’t know me.”

She was about to directly erase this memory from her, to see if she’d dare say she knew her again.

Chu Zhaoqiu saw through her intentions immediately, instantly flashing to her side.

She grabbed her hand, slowly pushing it down, shaking her head: “Don’t do this.”

Then, she glanced at Qu Xinru behind her.

Qu Xinru had her body hunched low, her face too.

She was resisting, and afraid, even trembling slightly.

Chu Zhaoqiu withdrew her gaze, turning to address Cen Zhu and Chu Sining: “Bu Yu is still at the foot of the mountain, go back to the Chu family residence with her and wait for me.”

Chu Sining looked at Fu Lianxue, then at her hand being held by Chu Zhaoqiu.

Those two raised fingers were slowly being gathered back by another hand, finally held firmly, as if completely restrained.

Chu Sining withdrew her gaze and nodded in agreement.

Since Jiejie could stop Fu Lianxue from taking action, she must have her reasons.

She should just listen to her elder sister and quickly take Cen Zhu away.

But Cen Zhu was hesitant.

She didn’t want to leave.

“Xinru…”

Why would she pretend not to know her?

Chu Zhaoqiu reminded her: “She’s very frightened right now.”

Cen Zhu pressed her lips together in silence.

After a moment of silence, she agreed to leave with Chu Sining first.

However, she had one condition: “You must not harm her.”

“Rest assured,” Chu Zhaoqiu promised.

Based on her trust in Chu Zhaoqiu, Cen Zhu finally agreed to leave.

Qu Xinru’s body moved slightly, carefully poking out her head, her gaze passing over Fu Lianxue’s shoulder, secretly watching Cen Zhu leave.

She really did recognize her, didn’t she?

Yet she told them not to harm her—she was still worried about her being harmed…

She came back to her senses and looked at Fu Lianxue and Chu Zhaoqiu, only to find these two were staring at her with mutual understanding.

“Tell us,” Fu Lianxue tilted her chin toward Chu Zhaoqiu, “how do you know her?”

Chu Zhaoqiu followed up: “And how did you two come to know each other?”

Qu Xinru: “Allow me to explain slowly.”

Chu Sining and Cen Zhu returned to the car.

Cen Zhu silently gazed at the high mountain road, and until the car left the mountain, she hadn’t spoken a single word.

The atmosphere in the car was heavy.

Chu Sining carefully observed Cen Zhu’s expression and said softly: “Could it be a mistake? That shouldn’t be Xinru, right?”

Cen Zhu silently clenched her hand and shook her head gently.

—She hadn’t made a mistake, that was Qu Xinru, she would never mistake her.

Up on the mountain, three people sat on stone chairs in the mountain breeze.

Chu Zhaoqiu and Fu Lianxue sat on the outside, with Qu Xinru sandwiched between them, no way to escape.

“Speak quickly, or we’ll be feeding mosquitoes soon,” Fu Lianxue said.

Chu Zhaoqiu, however, remained unhurried, neither rushing nor pushing.

“Oh oh, let me think where to start,” Qu Xinru stroked her chin in thought, and after a moment, she said, “I understand, I should start from when I met my lady.”

Then added: “No, no, I should start from when I met Ah Zhu!”

She finally sorted it out, her gaze turning toward the horizon, as if looking at their distant past—

She and Cen Zhu had known each other from very long ago.

It was in ancient times, when communication relied on letters, travel depended on feet and horses, when there were emperors and repeated invasions by barbarians – far less advanced and peaceful than now.

They were born in such an era.

But their social classes were different.

Cen Zhu was an imposing, respected General, while she was a lowly person sold into slavery by her parents.

Cen Zhu wore brocade and ate delicacies [錦衣玉食 | jǐn yī yù shí | idiom meaning lived in luxury], never worrying about food or clothing, while she never knew when her next meal would come, daily dreading when that vicious whip would fall on her back.

She was terrified of such a life, but she had nowhere to escape, no one to rely on.

She could only sink deeper into darkness, eventually becoming numb like a walking corpse.

Only when seeing Cen Zhu would her numb life briefly light up.

Sometimes she would see Cen Zhu riding past on horseback, radiant and unparalleled in the world.

That was their female General, their savior against the barbarian invaders.

At such times, light would appear in her eyes, a light of admiration and yearning.

After Cen Zhu went far away, she had to return to that hopeless state, continuing her endless days of suffering, or else face another beating.

Two such people, their fates were not meant to intersect.

But later, heaven took pity on her, and she accidentally entered the noble General’s world—Cen Zhu saved her from beneath that whip.

Even today, she clearly remembers that day.

When the whip fell on her body, she heard Cen Zhu’s voice commanding it to stop.

She walked toward her frail self, carefully and gently taking her hand.

She brought her back to the General’s mansion.

She said: “From now on, you will live here. With me around, you need not worry about being bullied anymore.”

At that time, Cen Zhu stood before her, as tall and divine as a heavenly deity who saves the suffering.

Looking at the bandages on her hands and the clean new clothes on her body, she could no longer hold back her loud sobbing.

She cried severely and sorrowfully, while also feeling afraid.

She deeply feared this was a dream, feared that when she woke up and opened her eyes, she would again see the falling whip.

She also feared that Cen Zhu would blame her for being discourteous.

So she cried while wiping her tears, simultaneously apologizing to Cen Zhu, begging the General for forgiveness.

But Cen Zhu didn’t blame her.

Cen Zhu stepped forward and embraced her very, very gently.

Cen Zhu said: “Cry if you want to cry, this isn’t something you should apologize for.”

She immediately cried even more fiercely.

In all her years of life, even her parents had never been this considerate and gentle with her.

From that day on, she became a servant girl by Cen Zhu’s side, following her with absolute devotion, serving her personally, attending to every detail of Cen Zhu’s daily needs.

Regarding Cen Zhu’s armor, she would meticulously maintain it daily, as if she were paying homage to her deity.

Later, she even became the managing servant [管家丫鬟 | guǎn jiā yā huán | head female servant] of Cen Zhu’s mansion.

Cen Zhu said she felt at ease leaving everything here in her care.

She never suffered beatings again.

She lived happily in the General’s mansion.

She was happiest when accompanying Cen Zhu.

She thought she would stay by the General’s side for life, repaying the debt of gratitude forever.

But heaven did not fulfill human wishes.

With the nation in turmoil, how could Cen Zhu remain content in one peaceful corner?

From the moment she chose this path, she was destined to have little peace in this life.

She had to go to the frontlines again.

She wanted to go with her, to take care of her.

But she wouldn’t allow it.

So she could only reluctantly bid her farewell at the gate.

“When you return, I will come to receive you immediately.”

She stood beneath the horse, looking up at her General with worry and anticipation.

Cen Zhu smiled brilliantly [飒爽 | sà shuǎng | heroic and handsome], reached down to pat her head, and shook her head saying: “No need, just wait for me at home.”

She left, taking her soldiers with her.

They went to a far and difficult place, to protect the country and defend the homeland.

And she could only remain at the mansion, waiting day after day.

She prayed for divine mercy, prayed for divine grace, to give this country and its people a future.

She also prayed for her General to return safely.

When she returned, she would immediately go to receive her, running to receive her.

But the deities didn’t hear her prayers, and instead she first heard news from afar:

Defeat, the border defenses had fallen.

She couldn’t believe it, her blood seemed to turn cold, her limbs growing numb.

Heaven still wouldn’t spare them—by the time she came to her senses, someone in the imperial city had seized the opportunity to rebel, leaving the people destitute.

Internal strife and external threats, not even giving them time to catch their breath.

In an instant, the country fell into complete chaos.

She guarded the General’s mansion, refusing to leave.

She waited hoping that person would return.

Yet until everyone in the mansion had fled, she still hadn’t seen her figure.

She didn’t believe it.

She had to go find her.

The news only spoke of defeat, it didn’t say the General had died—her General couldn’t be dead, she had to find her!

But she had never been to that place, how could she get there?

She didn’t know, but she still bravely set out on this path, asking people for directions as she walked.

That place was really far, very far away.

So far that she had no strength left, falling to the ground before reaching her destination.

But she still wanted to go, wanted to see her, wanted to bring her General home, no matter how far.

When she couldn’t walk, she crawled.

Days and nights alternated, continuing endlessly, she forgot how long she had crawled, and when she finally couldn’t hold on and closed her eyes, she lost all consciousness.

At that time she only remembered one thing: to bring the General home.

And after that?

After that she doesn’t quite remember.

After closing her eyes, she seemed to be moved by someone, thrown somewhere unknown.

Her body became very, very light, aimlessly attached to the ground, not knowing what she was doing yet still possessing an unyielding tenacity that refused to leave.

She stayed in place, vaguely anticipating something.

After waiting for who knows how long, someone finally appeared.

She heard footsteps, mysteriously sensing a powerful force approaching.

In her hazy state, she seemed to see a woman in purple robes.

The woman’s feet didn’t touch the ground, floating above a small mountain, beneath which seemed to be piled with people.

She saw everything hazily, everything was unclear.

But she could still see the woman casting spells, purple demonic qi rushing in all directions, sweeping across every inch of land, as if searching for something.

After a while, she saw the woman slightly relax.

The woman found nothing, yet also seemed to not want to find anything.

The woman was about to leave.

Realizing this, she found strength from somewhere unknown, rushing toward the woman at the fastest speed of her life, grabbing her robe’s hem, desperately pleading.

“Help me… please help me… please…”

Her voice was hoarse and deep, like a broken bellows, difficult to hear.

But she wasn’t even aware of this.

Her mind was entirely focused on keeping the woman here, asking for her help.

And this woman was Fu Lianxue.

Fu Lianxue slowly turned around, looked down at her, slightly frowning, showing an impatient expression.

“Help you? What do you take me for?” Fu Lianxue said in an icy voice, “Get lost.”

In that instant, a crushing pressure like a mountain pressed down on her.

But she still didn’t let go.

A voice in her heart told her that if she let go now, there would truly be no hope left.

“Help me…”

“I said, get lost.”

“Please…”

What answered her was a scorching spiritual force.

It suddenly fell upon her like a ball of fire, burning so hot she cried out, instinctively releasing Fu Lianxue’s robe hem.

At that time, Fu Lianxue was truly annoyed by her.

Or rather, she was annoyed by all things that rushed out from the roadside, asking for help without rhyme or reason.

Help?

What did they take her for?

A Bodhisattva descending to save the suffering?

Fu Lianxue turned to leave.

Unexpectedly, her robe hem was grabbed again.

“Help me… please… please…”

She still hadn’t given up.

Even when Fu Lianxue beat and chased her away, she didn’t give up.

Her obsession was like the roots of a giant tree, clutching desperately at Fu Lianxue’s robe hem, clutching at this mortal world, refusing to leave.

Fu Lianxue stood in place, looking down at her from above, suddenly saying: “Do you know I can make your soul scatter and spirit disperse?”

She paused for a moment, then fearlessly replied: “If I can see her, I’m willing to have my soul scattered and spirit dispersed.”

Fu Lianxue didn’t move.

She didn’t hear any sound.

At that moment, she was actually more frightened than anyone else.

She hadn’t seen the General yet, she didn’t want to have her soul scattered and spirit dispersed like this…

Suddenly, the beautiful purple dress swayed before her, flowing like water.

Then, Fu Lianxue crouched down.

“Tell me, who could make you willingly accept soul scattering and spirit dispersal?”

She saw hope.

She happily told Fu Lianxue about her General, about her valor, about her kindness, about how much she missed her.

She had to make it to the border, to see her General!

After listening, Fu Lianxue rested her chin in her hand and smiled, saying: “You seem unaware of something very serious about your situation.”

She asked puzzled: “What is it?”

Fu Lianxue said bluntly: “You’re already dead, and this place you’re in is called ‘Mass Burial Ground’ [亂葬崗 | luàn zàng gǎng | a place where unclaimed bodies are buried].

She froze.

Fu Lianxue looked calmly at what was before her.

No physical body, just a floating wisp of soul, and an obsession desperately clutching her dress.

She had died long ago.

Died on the way to find her General.

Fu Lianxue asked: “You died searching for her, not even realizing you were dead. This path, are you sure you still want to continue?”

“Yes.”

She didn’t hesitate.

“I must go, I must bring her home.”

If not for Cen Zhu, she would likely have been beaten to death in that alley.

It was Cen Zhu who let her live a few more years, it was Cen Zhu who showed her light.

She had to go, she had to keep going, until she saw her light again.

After she finished speaking, Fu Lianxue didn’t immediately respond.

After who knows how long, she heard a light chuckle, followed by Fu Lianxue’s voice: “Very well, I’ll help you.”

Fu Lianxue fed her a flower petal.

She didn’t know where Fu Lianxue conjured it from, only that it was magical, even a soul could consume it.

After eating it, her soul seemed to be repaired, becoming whole again.

She could move now, freely and unrestrained, rather than sticking to the ground like a puddle of mud.

Her consciousness also became clearer, able to think about more things.

—She seemed to have been reborn.

But Fu Lianxue’s words poured cold water on her.

“You haven’t been reborn, because your physical body is too completely decayed to use.”

Fu Lianxue looked her up and down, saying: “Which means, you’ve become a ghost, understand?”

She nodded, then shook her head.

This kind of strange magic was something she’d never seen before, her mind couldn’t keep up.

But thanks to Fu Lianxue, she could once again set out on the path to find her General.

“Flower?” Chu Zhaoqiu caught the key point, leaning slightly backward, looking at Fu Lianxue said, “You fed her a flower?”

Fu Lianxue crossed her arms, raising an eyebrow: “Oh, you know about it?”

Chu Zhaoqiu nodded once.

Fu Lianxue waved her hand dismissively: “It’s not like I fed her a whole one.”

Their back and forth left Qu Xinru in the middle completely confused.

“What flower, what whole one, what does this mean…”

Chu Zhaoqiu and Fu Lianxue both looked at her.

At this moment, they tacitly changed the subject, not letting her dwell on this question.

Chu Zhaoqiu: “It’s nothing, we’re still talking about your story, continue.”

Fu Lianxue: “Children shouldn’t ask so many questions, continue telling Young Master Chu your story, tell her if you eventually found your General.”

“I did,” Qu Xinru said.

She really did find her.

On that battlefield full of dead.

Her General wore the battle armor she had carefully maintained every day, tightly gripping their military banner, kneeling among the scattered remains on the ground.

The General’s body was pierced with arrows, head bowed, while the military banner beside her stood between heaven and earth, undefeated and unbowed.

That was the scene she had feared most to see.

She didn’t even dare acknowledge that it was Cen Zhu’s armor.

But when she hesitated, stumbling forward to her, she still saw that face.

That face that had smiled at her before leaving was now covered in blood, dirty, and cold.

But after all this time, Cen Zhu’s body showed no sign of decay, as if divinely protected.

Her mind went completely blank, wanting to reach out and touch Cen Zhu’s face.

But just as her hand reached Cen Zhu’s face, it was scalded by a murderous qi, as if warning her not to come closer.

She sensed something, looking up at the military banner fluttering in the wind.

She spoke softly to Cen Zhu: “General, I’ve come to take you home.”

In an instant, the murderous qi dispersed.

Cen Zhu’s face quickly withered, the exposed skin no longer full and intact, like it had been dried in the sun.

She turned into white bones, no longer able to hold the military banner.

The wind blew, and the stark white bone hand fell powerlessly.

The white bones in battle armor fell together with the military banner, falling upon this ruined land, never to return.

It was that day she first learned that even as a ghost, one could still cry when deeply sad.

---

---