Sing to you what I’m singing
Distance from Anjiang City a thousand miles away, Xia Zhijin finally finished filming her scenes despite just getting a two-day break for New Year’s Day only to be asked last minute to shoot additional scenes.
Despite it being New Year’s Eve, there was no festive atmosphere on set at all. Everyone was busy, chaos with order. As the main scenes momentarily paused, supporting actors came in, and the crew had to work through the night.
As the night grew deeper and the north wind bitingly cold, Fu Zhiqiong gave her assistant to Xia Zhijin. When the director called it a wrap, Xia Zhijin couldn’t help but cough, and the assistant Xiao Liu quickly brought a heavy down jacket, tightly wrapping Xia Zhijin up.
A few days ago, Xia Zhijin filmed a scene in the water, spending over half an hour in the freezing water during the dead of winter, causing her to develop a high fever that same night. Since filming had to continue the next day, Xia Zhijin didn’t want to delay the progress of the crew, she took some medicine, hid her sickly appearance with makeup, and continued filming despite the fever lingering for days until today.
Xia Zhijin bid farewell to the director, politely thanked the actors, crew, wished them a happy New Year, and then called Xiao Liu to go back to the hotel together, prepare their luggage, and head to the airport.
Xia Zhijin has a better temper than Fu Zhiqiong, humble and moderate in her actions. Xiao Liu had been with her for nearly two months, viewing her as part employer, part younger sister. As they were about to get in the car and leave, Xiao Liu couldn’t help but worry, saying, “Your illness hasn’t improved much. After finally getting a break, shouldn’t you just rest at the hotel for two days and catch up on sleep?”
Wearing a mask, Xia Zhijin showed only her tired but smiling eyes, joking in a hoarse voice, “Don’t worry, Sister Liu. I’ll be fine. Once I get back, with a better mood, the illness might just fade away by itself. Besides, don’t you want to go back and see your boyfriend?”
Unable to sway Xia Zhijin, Xiao Liu chuckled, “I’m just concerned about you getting even more exhausted.” Secretly, she thought, if she wanted to see her boyfriend when she got back, then who was Xia Zhijin in a rush to see?
Xiao Liu knew Xia Zhijin had a younger sister named Shi Man who she cared deeply for. When Xia Zhijin was filming, Shi Man would often call, and Xiao Liu would hand the phone over. Sometimes, she felt it was a bit excessive, but in this line of work, everyone knew some things were better left unsaid, and no matter how curious she was, Xiao Liu didn’t dare to pry.
At the airport waiting area, Xiao Liu saw Xia Zhijin make two unanswered calls and asked, “What’s wrong?”
Xia Zhijin’s bright eyes dimmed for a moment, paused for two seconds, and said dejectedly, “It’s nothing. I wanted to surprise Manman, but she didn’t answer her phone.” Initially unsure and afraid of disappointing Shi Man, she had told her she’d return the next day. However, unable to resist the desire to see Shi Man sooner, she booked the latest flight possible.
As the boarding announcement came through, Xia Zhijin turned off her phone, saying to Xiao Liu and to herself, “It’s okay, let’s go, it’ll be fine when we get back.” She felt uncertain inside, wondering if Shi Man couldn’t hear the call or purposely didn’t answer to make her upset.
It was almost midnight in Anjiang City, where the atmosphere at the New Year’s concert was lively. Since the main singer took the stage, the audience had been standing and singing along passionately.
Lin Xian initially worried that her excitement might startle Xiao Panpan, but she found Xiao Panpan to be more relaxed than expected. Despite the enthusiastic screams from fans around them, Xiao Wanqing always wore a smile and sometimes hummed along. Lin Xian gradually relaxed.
Lin Xian waved her glow sticks to the beat, looked through the dim lights at the emotionally moved Xiao Wanqing, watching as she swayed the glow stick with one hand and brushed back her slightly disheveled bangs with the other, a rare carefree moment. The smile in Lin Xian’s eyes deepened involuntarily.
As the song reached the chorus on stage, the atmosphere grew increasingly fervent. Lin Xian moved close to Xiao Wanqing’s ear and raised her voice to call out, “Xiao Panpan, I want to hear you sing.”
Xiao Wanqing had already stopped humming the moment Lin Xian drew near, covering her other ear, completely focused on listening to the girl’s whispers. Upon hearing her words, a radiant smile bloomed on her lips.
Turning her head, she caught Lin Xian gazing at her with smiling eyes. They shared a glance, then Lin Xian turned her head, moving aside the delicate hair by her ear. Xiao Wanqing gently touched Lin Xian’s head and leaned in with a smile.
“If you’re not by my side, no one else can see, used to missing you. Want to say I love you, love you unchanged, giving you all eyes…” Lin Xian covered her other ear to listen, feeling as if the whole world had quieted down, leaving only the gentle serenade in her ear from her beloved, accompanied by warm, lingering sighs that stirred her heartstrings.
She couldn’t help but turn her head, resting her forehead against Xiao Wanqing’s in the dimness, clearly seeing the tender affection in her lover’s eyes. Amidst the clamor, they listened to each other’s lively heartbeats. You envelop me, I envelop you, you’re in me, I’m in you.
The New Year countdown had started, but the sky began to drizzle. The audience on the stage didn’t seem to notice, but there was some commotion among those inside. The host quickly improvised, saying, “It’s raining. We welcome the first rain of the New Year as a blessing. It seems that in the upcoming year, our lives will be full of vitality and prosperity.”
Everyone cheered up, undeterred by the cold, clapping and continuing the countdown in the light rain.
Shi Jinglan remained seated calmly, unaffected by the warmth around her. At this moment, she finally stood up, gazing up at the numbers on the big screen, silently counting down in her mind.
Wen Tong raised her hand to clap and accidentally touched Shi Jinglan’s hand, feeling a chill from her cold hands. She instinctively looked down and noticed the faint purplish hue at the tips of Shi Jinglan’s delicate fingers.
Before she could say anything, the clock suddenly struck, and the fireworks and firecrackers resounded throughout the square.
In 2013, the new year arrived.
Shi Jinglan glanced at the fireworks for a moment, then turned to Wen Tong with a gentle smile on her face, softly saying, “Happy New Year.”
Surrounded by loud noises, Wen Tong couldn’t hear Shi Jinglan clearly, but could roughly make out her words from her lip movements, saying “Happy New Year.”
It seemed like the first time Wen Tong had seen Shi Jinglan smile so sincerely. The light amber in her eyes displayed a shallow yet gentle smile, as if she had finally shed her heavy, aloof facade, revealing a soft and harmless true self.
Wen Tong was momentarily stunned by her smile, then she softened her gaze and returned a smile, genuinely wishing her, “Happy New Year.”
She instinctively clasped her fingers, hesitated for a moment, and then, as if in a trance, reached out and grabbed Shi Jinglan’s hands, as cold as ice, to her surprise. She held Shi Jinglan’s hands in front of her, blew a breath of warmth, and then looked up with a smile, saying again, “Happy New Year.”
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Shi Jinglan gazed at Wen Tong, and her typically calm eyes showed a slight hint of emotion.
At the moment the New Year bell rang, Lin Xian and Xiao Wanqing almost simultaneously looked at each other, saying “Happy New Year” together. Then, as if touched by each other’s understanding, they smiled at each other and, embraced openly, caught up in the surrounding atmosphere.
Sitting in the back row, Shi Man clearly saw Wen Tong blowing warmth into Shi Jinglan’s hands in the front row and Lin Xian and Xiao Wanqing embracing. She wiped the cold rain on her face and turned to see Chen Zhi still enjoying the fireworks beside her. She couldn’t help but feel a twinge of sadness, as if the chill had seeped into her heart from her body.
“Happy New Year.” Shi Man clasped her hands for warmth, listening to the lively cheers and laughter around her, closing her eyes and silently saying to Xia Zhijin in her heart.
Approaching midnight, the event finally came to an end. With the crowd dispersing, the sea of people looked overwhelming. Lin Xian, Xiao Wanqing, and Shi Man, fearing the crowds, silently waited until the very end.
As they were leaving, Shi Jinglan passed by Shi Man and stopped, asking her softly, “How are you getting back?”
“I’ll have the driver come to pick me up,” Shi Man said as she took out her phone. After pressing the home button a couple of times with no response, she realized her phone had run out of battery at some point. She glanced at Shi Jinglan, then at Wen Tong behind her talking to Xiao Wanqing, sighed, and helplessly said, “My phone died. Mom, could you please ask Uncle Chen to come pick me up, or maybe, leave your driver for me.”
Shi Jinglan furrowed her eyebrows slightly, allowing Shi Man to jot down the number on Chen Zhi’s phone. She replied, “Lao Zhang is in the parking lot across the street. Once you’re done, give him a call. Stay safe on the way.”
With that, she turned back, bid Xiao Wanqing goodbye, adjusted her coat, and leisurely walked outside.
Wen Tong overheard the conversation between Shi Jinglan and Shi Man, and gathered that Shi Jinglan had left her driver for Shi Man. Watching Shi Jinglan confidently walk away, Wen Tong felt a mix of annoyance and amusement. Unable to shake off her concern, she bid Xiao Wanqing goodbye, saying, “Forget it, I’ll leave first. I’ll take President Shi home.”
Lin Xian smirked ambiguously, Xiao Wanqing chuckled, teasing Wen Tong, “You better hurry, you won’t catch up with her.”
Wen Tong waved her hand and hurriedly chased after her.
As Wen Tong left, her plan to have dinner struck Chen Zhi, who had been standing by. She had put in a great effort to support at the concert and her stomach was growling with hunger.
“How about finding a place to grab something to eat?” Chen Zhi linked arms with Shi Man, suggesting as they walked. She couldn’t cook at all, and her parents at home were probably already asleep. Without eating anything, she figured all she could do when she got home was drink some hot water to warm her stomach.
“I’m okay with it,” Shi Man replied in a low mood, thinking about the dimly lit home awaiting her.
Xiao Wanqing remained silent, seeking Lin Xian’s opinion with her eyes. Lin Xian gently asked her, “How about grabbing a bite?” Feeling a bit hungry herself.
Xiao Wanqing readily agreed, saying, “Alright, let’s go grab something to eat then.”
However, it was close to midnight, and the nearby stores were either closed and shuttered or occupied by early-goers, making it challenging to find a spot.
“I have a friend who has a shop just a little further ahead. At this time, she should still be open. Do you want to go there?” Shi Man asked.
“Is there food available? If there’s food, then count me in,” Chen Zhi, looking at the long queue inside the restaurant ahead through the glass window, was no longer picky about where to eat.
Shi Man smiled, saying, “Of course there is, let’s go.”
However, what they didn’t expect was that the place Shi Man mentioned was actually a bar. Before even entering, they could hear the lively chatter and music emanating from inside.
Inside the bar, with its vibrant lights and energetic music, Lin Xian felt like her heart was about to jump out of her chest. It was Chen Zhi and Lin Xian’s first time in a bar, standing at the entrance, looking at each other like Granny Liu who had mistakenly entered a grand pavilion. Xiao Wanqing calmly squeezed Lin Xian’s slightly bewildered hand, smiling affectionately to reassure her not to panic.
After exchanging a few words with the server, Shi Man turned around to beckon Lin Xian and others, saying, “Let’s go, we’ll wait in the private room upstairs. Someone will bring the food in shortly.”
Leading Xiao Wanqing and the others confidently into the bar, a mature and alluring woman with smoky makeup and big waves in her hair appeared out of nowhere along the way. Familiarly teasing Shi Man, she said, “Is the little boss Shi starting off the new year by inspecting business? Where’s your precious little Zhijin, doesn’t she dislike you coming to these places?” This bar was partially funded by Shi Jinglan a few years ago as an investment for Shi Man that she used to hone her business skills.
Shi Man chuckled, unperturbed by her teasing, casually replied, “I’m hungry and I miss your cooking, sister, so I came to eat.”
“Are you treating this like a late-night food joint?” The woman glared disapprovingly. Yet, she seemed to have a soft spot inside as she turned away, retorting, “I’m actually preparing to play mahjong, including you. Just wait.”
“Okay, thank you, sister.” Shi Man sweetly replied to the woman’s departing figure.
“Little boss Shi is really a hidden talent, my apologies, my apologies.” Lin Xian and Chen Zhi both playfully bowed to Shi Man as if she were a big shot.
Amused by her antics, Shi Man ignored the others and squeezed in between Lin Xian and Xiao Wanqing, taking Xiao Wanqing’s hand and softly saying, “Aunt Xiao, let’s go.”
Lin Xian instantly spoiled the moment, pushing her way back with frustration, “Hey! Shi Manman, let go!”
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Chen Zhi, Xiao Wanqing, and Shi Man couldn’t help but stifle their laughter.
As the door to the private room closed, cutting off the outside noise, Xiao Wanqing calmly relaxed her furrowed brow. However, to their surprise, the room was spacious and equipped with a complete KTV setup. Chen Zhi, not fully satisfied with her performance at a concert she had attended earlier, excitedly spotted the microphone and rushed to the song selection station, quickly choosing several songs and then starting to deliver a flood of noise.
Listening to Chen Zhi’s completely off-key singing, Lin Xian furrowed her brows in pain and complained to Xiao Wanqing beside her, “Next time, I definitely won’t go to KTV with her, it’s too scary. I feel sorry for the friends who were next to her earlier.”
Xiao Wanqing’s ears were also starting to ache a bit, but upon hearing this, she couldn’t help but smile. She gently lifted her hand to massage Lin Xian’s furrowed brow.
“Chen Zhi, my head hurts from listening,” Shi Man couldn’t hold back any longer and lamented.
Chen Zhi pouted, hmphed, and proudly finished the entire song before realizing with a guilty conscience, “But none of you are singing either. Manman, you go ahead.”
“I’m too weak from being injured by your singing.” Shi Man wasn’t feeling particularly enthusiastic tonight and declined, saying, “Lin Xian, you go up and soothe my nerves.”
Lin Xian glanced at the chairs under the large screen in front and then at Xiao Wanqing. Her eyes wandered a bit before suddenly sitting beside Shi Man and whispering a few words into her ear.
Xiao Wanqing only saw a slight smile at the corner of Shi Man’s lips as she said, “Sure,” and then stood up and left the private room. Curiously, she asked Lin Xian, but Lin Xian just blinked mysteriously and played coy.
Shortly after, Shi Man returned, followed by a waiter carrying an accordion. Lin Xian glanced at Xiao Wanqing and got up to meet them, accepting the accordion.
She sat in the chair directly facing Xiao Wanqing, adjusting the position of the accordion and the microphone in front of her. Gazing at Xiao Wanqing, her eyes and smile were filled with tenderness as she said, “Xiao Panpan, do you remember the first time you saw me play the accordion?”
Chen Zhi and Shi Man sat on the sofa, observing Lin Xian and Xiao Wanqing with knowing smiles. Their shipper hearts were on fire.
Xiao Wanqing looked into the eyes of the young and delicate girl in front of her, nodding to indicate that she remembered.
“Do you remember when I said back then that I would marry you and play for you every day?” Lin Xian bit her lip, feeling a bit shy. “This piece was one I wanted to give to you last Christmas. Back then, I already couldn’t help but like you.”
The melodious and enchanting music filled the room as Lin Xian’s slender fingers danced on the keys of the accordion. Xiao Wanqing was immersed in the music, envisioning a scene like a movie – dark skies, pouring rain outside the building, and a snow-covered landscape with someone running out barefoot to embrace Autumn moon in tears. She thought of herself and Lin Xian, reflecting on the journey they had walked together, feeling a tinge of sadness building up.
As the music gradually faded, Lin Xian gazed at Xiao Wanqing and deeply uttered the line she had once written on paper but never sent: “Vaguely expecting thunder to clear the sky, hoping that the rain and wind will keep you here.”
Xiao Wanqing’s throat felt tight, and aching she stood up, forgetting about Shi Man and Chen Zhi’s presence, and went to Lin Xian’s side, wrapping the girl tightly in her arms.
Lowering her head, she softly and tenderly responded to Lin Xian, “Even if there’s no rain, I will stay here with you.”
Looking up, Lin Xian gazed at the woman’s smooth and charming jawline, emotionally calling out to her, “Xiao Panpan.”
Xiao Wanqing sniffed, pushing down the sweet and bittersweet feelings in her heart. She playfully tapped Lin Xian’s nose and said, “Don’t you want to hear me sing for you?” Lifting her head, she casually asked Chen Zhi, who was sitting next to the song-selecting booth, “Xiaozhi, can you please request a song for me?”
Softly and slowly, she said, “Lin Xian, listen, I will sing my heart out to you.”
As the intro of the song played, Xiao Wanqing held the microphone, gazing at Lin Xian. Even before she began singing, Lin Xian felt like she was already drowning in the tender and affectionate gaze of her beloved.
“Yearning is a mysterious thing, following like a shadow…” As Xiao Wanqing began to sing, her voice was clear, soothing, and a bit ethereal, flowing from her throat. Chen Zhi and Shi Man sat up straight with eyes full of surprise. It turns out, Auntie Xiao was the one truly hiding her talents.
“…I’m willing for you, I’m willing for you, even if we’re banished to the ends of the earth, as long as you respond with love from your heart, I’m willing to do anything…” Lin Xian listened to the melodious and moving voice lingering in her ears, and her whole being softened. Her heart and eyes were filled with the enchanting woman before her, who was singing passionately for her.
She thought, she was the one willing to do anything, willing to do anything for her.
“Ah, Auntie Xiao, another song!” After the song ended, Chen Zhi instantly became a superfan, enthusiastically cheering.
Overwhelmed by emotions, Lin Xian reached out and embraced Xiao Wanqing, lifting her head as if to kiss her. Xiao Wanqing glanced at the two melon eaters on the sofa, subconsciously tilting her head. Lin Xian’s fervent kiss landed on her cheek.
Biting her lip, Xiao Wanqing looked at the excited Chen Zhi and the moved Shi Man. She belatedly began to feel shy, and her exposed little ears turned red, almost dripping with embarrassment.
She cleared her throat, unconsciously touching her burning ears, and whispered, “I’ll go to the bathroom for a moment.” With hurried and shy steps, she quickly walked out.
Lin Xian, not having kissed Xiao Wanqing, was momentarily stunned. The next second, she looked at Shi Man and Chen Zhi, suddenly understanding. She raised her eyebrows slightly, trying to cover up the situation, “I’ll also go to the bathroom.” Without caring about the ambiguous expressions on Shi Man and Chen Zhi’s faces, she quickly followed.
As Xiao Wanqing entered the bathroom and turned on the tap at the sink, Lin Xian followed in, casually closing and locking the door with a click.
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Surprised at the sound, Xiao Wanqing turned to see familiar breath enveloping her, a warm body pressing close, tightly embracing her, and offering a passionate kiss.
The girl’s kiss was assertive yet gentle, causing Xiao Wanqing to, for the first time, hold back her embarrassment and open her eyes to gaze at the fluttering long eyelashes mere inches away. Her eyes softened as if they were about to tear up. Embracing Lin Xian tightly around the neck, overflowing with love, she actively and passionately responded, encouraging the girl to become even more fervent.
“Bang, bang, bang…” Suddenly, there was a urgent and forceful knocking on the door from outside.
Lin Xian paused, wanting to continue, but Xiao Wanqing turned her head away and pushed Lin Xian, gesturing for her to go and open the door. Pouting, Lin Xian reluctantly wiped away the water stain from Xiao Wanqing’s vibrant red lips with a kiss, tidied up her hair, and then together they went to open the door.
The person outside looked at them strangely, muttering, “Why close the door…”
Lin Xian and Xiao Wanqing glanced at each other and simultaneously smiled awkwardly, lowering their heads as they quickly ran outside.
“Let’s go back, I’ll text Chen Zhi.” In the hallway, Lin Xian suggested with fiery eyes.
“Okay.” Xiao Wanqing adjusted Lin Xian’s slightly disheveled hair and softly agreed with a gentle expression.
Interlocking their fingers, they walked out of the bar side by side, entering the hazy night and stepping into the drizzle-like rain. Lin Xian opened her long coat and affectionately enveloped Xiao Wanqing within it.
The neon lights ahead flickered as Lin Xian whispered in Xiao Wanqing’s ear, “Xiao Panpan, what is your New Year’s wish?”
Xiao Wanqing’s warm, watery eyes closed for a moment before she answered:
“Today is the result of every year, and now is the beginning of every age.”