Fate Trading System – Chapter 88

Plan A

Sun Yixiao

She and her love

My name is Sun Yixiao, a name that seems very carefree.

However, I don’t know if it’s like some strange language, but usually girls named Wenjing are actually not very quiet.

My name is Yixiao, but I cannot laugh it off for some people and some things.

April 1, 2014, I died. I didn’t expect it.

Just like I also didn’t expect that I would fall for Miss L.

Miss L is a very good girl. When I was being bullied by several girls who pinned me to the ground, she walked over and kicked them one by one. I thought she was very cool. Although I was bullied even more severely afterward, I was still very happy. Look, someone once stood up to help me.

I play an insignificant role in her life. To her, I might just be an ordinary passerby, but she doesn’t know that in my world, she is as bright and dazzling as the sun.

I’ve been secretly following her, a bit like a stalker.

But I worry about her. She’s so beautiful; what if something happens to her?

In the end, something really did happen. A driver who ran a red light crashed towards her. I don’t know where I got the strength, but I rushed over and pushed her away, then became a meat patty myself.

Hmm, a disgusting description, not a beautiful way to die at all.

I thought I was going to leave like this, but unexpectedly I heard a strange voice. So there really are systems in this world.

Indeed, they say good people are rewarded after all.

I’ve always felt that living in this world requires keeping hope.

So even though my father committed suicide due to gambling debts, my mother ran away with someone, I was despised, and I lived alone with my unpleasant grandmother, I didn’t think much of it.

When I was beaten black and blue, I also wondered why not just die? Death would end it all. But I didn’t want to die; it seemed too wasteful. I still hadn’t… I still hadn’t seen the whole world.

Later, when I met Miss L, I realized that not choosing to end my life back then was the right choice. Perhaps my groundless persistence in staying alive was because I would meet her?

Actually, I’m very happy that I could die for her.

I don’t know why, but in the first world, I saw someone who looked very much like her.

While focusing on my mission, I chased after her.

I always believe that the flower of love will bloom here with me.

Yes, love.

I like her, but she doesn’t like me.

System Fourteen is good, and having missions is also good. This way, I won’t put my whole heart on hers, and then feel dejected.

I know this is unambitious, but uncontrollably, I always want to find my own value in others.

It’s as if gaining others’ approval gives me the motivation to live on.

I chase after my own love time and time again. Sometimes I get what I want, being embraced, being desired.

But in the end, I’m always abandoned.

She didn’t fall in love with someone else; she just stopped loving me.

It’s truly despair-inducing.

But I won’t give up.

If I give up so easily, how can I do justice to my relentless pursuit?

One day, Fourteen told me it had brought a new host. I talked with that girl called Su Xin. At that time, I was in her arms. I was very happy.

From her voice, I felt that Fourteen’s new host must be a very confident person. That’s great.

I also want to restrain myself from relying on and clinging to others like a dodder, but I can’t help it. I can be composed when dealing with others, but except for her, I lose all my defenses.

Then I present the softest part of myself to her, telling her I love her.

I really like her so much, so much that I feel like I’m about to die.

But I was still abandoned.

When I was abandoned for the eighteenth time, I went to drink and talked to Fourteen in my mind. To others, I might seem crazy.

I probably am crazy.

So I want to make myself more clear-headed.

I smash the bottle on my head until it’s bleeding profusely.

I smell the scent of alcohol, and the smell of blood.

It hurts a lot, but it’s still not enough to sober up.

I cry out loudly, to hell with this damn, cursed love.

I know at that time I must have looked as miserable as a stray dog. Others would only think I’m having a drunken fit; they wouldn’t understand how sad I am.

But anyway, I didn’t plan to let others know.

Fourteen awkwardly comforts me, and I laugh and cry at the same time.

If only mister system had a physical form, I would definitely hug him and thank him.

I’m not stupid. There’s someone like her in every world; it can’t possibly be a coincidence.

But being rejected again and again, abandoned again and again.

I’m so tired.

I’m sorry, this time I really can’t hold on anymore.

I chose to resign and started a life of traveling to clear my mind, but in the end, I still couldn’t help but return to her side.

Although I’ve never truly had her, it feels like I’ve lost her countless times.

In the real world, I gathered my courage to confess to her, starting another round of entanglement.

After the final rejection, I completely chose to give up.

She’s really wonderful; it’s me who isn’t good enough for her.

I’m very grateful to her. During my darkest times, she came and stayed for a while.

As the cold seawater flooded into my body, I heard the voice of my past companion again.

This time, I chose to refuse.

I no longer have the motivation to live on.

I don’t hate this world, even though it has brought me so much pain. I’m still grateful because it brought me Miss L.

Even if I die, I still love this world very much.

After all, it’s truly beautiful; it’s just that I didn’t get what I wanted.

A trivial love, that’s all.

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