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    The Hand of Confession, Slightly Trembling

    The Hand of Confession – Chapter 312

    by Little Panda

    Volume 9: The Days Can’t Be Lived Anymore

    Dyeing Hair

    Change your hair, change your mood.

    “Me?” Shen Maomao was a little surprised. “What about me? Why are you targeting me?”

    Lou Jingmo said, “It just suddenly occurred to me. We’re inside a game, and everything we do is probably being recorded. In that case, the people behind the game obviously know about the contract between us. They would also know that if something were to happen to me, the one who dies would be you.”

    Shen Maomao said, “That’s true, but I’m just a rookie newbie player. There’s no need to go to such great lengths just to kill me, right?”

    Lou Jingmo glanced at her and nodded in agreement. “You have a point.”

    Shen Maomao gave her two sincere eye-rolls​1.

    Lou Jingmo said, “It’s just an irresponsible guess of mine. Maybe the people behind the game don’t have the spare time to pay attention to every player’s situation. Maybe I was just coincidentally unlucky.”

    Shen Maomao yawned. “What time is it? Shouldn’t we be going to sleep?”

    Lou Jingmo looked at her phone. “It’s ten-thirty.”

    Shen Maomao: “Are we still driving the car tonight?”

    Lou Jingmo looked completely bewildered. “You don’t have a kidney deficiency​2?”

    Shen Maomao patted her shoulder. “Getting a kidney deficiency at such a young age? How about I buy some leeks​3 tomorrow to help you nourish your kidneys?”

    Lou Jingmo: “???”

    She felt she had to prove to a certain death-courting rabbit that there was nothing wrong with her kidneys.

    In the end, however, nothing happened. The two just cuddled in bed for a while before Shen Maomao fell asleep from exhaustion.

    As usual, Lou Jingmo wasn’t sleepy. She lay on her side next to Shen Maomao, turned her phone’s brightness to the lowest setting, and swiped idly at the screen, though her attention wasn’t on it.

    Shen Maomao’s even breathing filled her ears, but she was afraid that the sound would suddenly stop, which would probably make her own heart stop along with it.

    Death itself was far less terrifying than the wait for it. The Sword of Damocles​4 was hanging over her head, yet Shen Maomao, the one about to die, had such a no-heart-no-lungs​5 appearance…

    Lou Jingmo turned off her phone screen and stared intently at Shen Maomao’s profile.

    Tomorrow morning, would she still be able to have a living rabbit?

    She stayed like this until four in the morning before finally closing her eyes for a short, uneasy rest.

    Less than three hours later, she snapped her eyes open to find that there was no one beside her.

    Dazed, she sat up abruptly. Her head was splitting, and the sky was spinning and the earth was turning before her eyes, making her unable to tell for a moment whether this was a dream or reality.

    Where was Shen Maomao?

    She threw off the covers and got out of bed, not even bothering to put on slippers as she rushed downstairs.

    Downstairs, Shen Maomao heard the noise and poked her head out of the kitchen, holding a spoon. “Oh? I thought you’d sleep in a little longer.”

    Lou Jingmo froze for a second, then strode quickly to the kitchen and hugged Shen Maomao, who was standing in front of the pot, without saying a word for a long time.

    Shen Maomao’s eyes inexplicably turned red. She wrapped her free arm around Lou Jingmo’s back and comforted her softly, “It’s okay… It’s okay… I came down to make you some congee. I’m right here.”

    The two held each other for a full minute before Lou Jingmo let go and walked upstairs as if nothing had happened. “Don’t burn it this time.”

    Shen Maomao was exasperated. “I only burned it once! Just once! If you say another word, I’ll dump the whole pot of congee on your head!”

    Lou Jingmo poked her head back down from the stairs. “Would you have the heart to?” After saying that, she gave a soft wink with her left eye.

    Shen Maomao: “!” She couldn’t out-sao​6 her. This was the wife she had chosen, what else could she do but dote on her?

    During the meal, Lou Jingmo suddenly suggested, “Should I go dye my hair pink?”

    Shen Maomao, with a spoon in her mouth, said, “Eh? So suddenly?”

    Lou Jingmo nodded. “I suddenly feel like pink would suit me quite well.”

    Shen Maomao recalled the pink-haired Lou Jingmo from the game, and she nearly started drooling. “I think it’ll work, especially well! I want to dye my hair too! And get big waves like yours, be the coolest kid on the whole gai​7…”

    Lou Jingmo coolly rejected her. “Don’t even think about it.”

    Shen Maomao: “Oh.”

    After eating, Lou Jingmo went out for a wash, cut, and blow-dry​8, all while live-updating Shen Maomao over the phone.

    Shen Maomao was tempted several times to play dead to scare her, but in the end, she couldn’t go through with it—firstly, because she couldn’t bear to hurt her, and secondly, because she was afraid Lou Jingmo would get angry.

    Dyeing hair is a long process. Shen Maomao watched 《Final Destination》​9 on her computer while chatting with her on and off. She chatted until her stomach was hungry and her throat was hoarse, and finally, she heard Lou Jingmo say through the phone, “It’s done.”

    Shen Maomao perked up instantly. “What’s it look like! Let me kangkang​10!”

    Lou Jingmo: “You’ll see it when I get back.”

    Shen Maomao was already impatient and urged, “Come on, this child can’t wait. Take a picture and let me see it first, please?”

    A moment later, a picture was sent over.

    The photo was taken right in the hair salon. In the picture, Lou Jingmo’s long hair had been cut to her neck, styled and curled, and dyed a beautiful sakura pink, which made the skin on her face and neck look so white it seemed to reflect light. She was looking at the camera with her eyelids half-lowered, a hint of carelessness in her gaze, yet it was full of aggression, even more beautiful and striking than her look in the game.

    Shen Maomao didn’t hold back her praise. “Oh my god, is this some kind of fairy descending to the mortal world​11? With you changing your style, it’s like I got a new girlfriend. So exciting.”

    Lou Jingmo sent her a “Get lost.”

    Shen Maomao continued to flatter, “The pinker the hair, the fiercer the insult​12. As expected of you, Lou-jie.”

    Lou Jingmo couldn’t help but laugh.

    She went to the front desk to pay, refusing the receptionist’s Amway pitch​13 for a membership card and his request to exchange contact information. Then she muted her side of the call and bought some hair-dyeing equipment and several different colors of dye.

    Shen Maomao shouted from the other end of the line, “Hello? Hello? Lou Jingmo, it says you’re muted on my end, what’s going on? What are you doing behind my back? Is there something I can’t hear? Have you started floating​14, or can I no longer hold a knife?”

    After buying her things, Lou Jingmo walked out of the salon and unmuted herself. “My phone was in my pocket, I didn’t notice. Did you need something?”

    Shen Maomao: “No, I just suspected you were off finding other dogs​15 behind my back.”

    Lou Jingmo said, “You’re too heavy, I can’t carry you on my back.”

    Shen Maomao: “??”

    Lou Jingmo immediately changed the subject. “It’s noon. Is there anything you want to eat?”

    Shen Maomao: “I want duck blood and vermicelli soup​16.”

    “Anything else?”

    “You know me so well.” Shen Maomao giggled. “I’d like a cup of Taro Paste Bobo Milk Tea​17, hold the taro paste…”

    Lou Jingmo: “Get lost.”

    Shen Maomao: “…Oh.”

    It was another day for the plastic couple​18.

    An hour later, Lou Jingmo took out her keys and opened the door to their home. Along with her came the enticing aroma of duck blood and vermicelli soup.

    Shen Maomao got up from the sofa to greet her, making a beeline for the soup in her hands.

    With an “I-knew-it” expression, Lou Jingmo raised the soup high. “Where are your manners?”

    Shen Maomao suppressed a laugh and planted a heavy kiss on her cheek. “MUA​19! Lou-jie, you’re the best! Come, come, give me the bag. It must be so heavy, you must be exhausted, right? What all did you buy?”

    Saying this, she began to rummage through the bag, pulling out her milk tea and also the hair-dyeing tools. “This is…”

    Lou Jingmo took off her shoes and entered the house. “I’ll dye it for you after we eat.”

    Shen Maomao: “You know how to do this?!”

    Lou Jingmo said nonchalantly, “I just learned a bit while I was there. It should be fine.”

    “Should be?”

    Lou Jingmo looked at her steadily. “You don’t dare?”

    Shen Maomao: “What’s there to not dare about? It’s just dyeing my hair. It’s not like you can dye my face a different color, right?”

    Lou Jingmo smiled gently and handed her the duck blood and vermicelli soup. “Then pack up and get ready to set off on your journey​20.”

    The two sat opposite each other, slurping their noodles, happy as could be.

    After finishing the noodles, Shen Maomao went to the kitchen to deal with the trash, while Lou Jingmo went to the bathroom to prepare the tools.

    When she was done, she headed straight for the bathroom. As soon as she opened the door, she saw Lou Jingmo standing in front of a chair. She patted the back of the chair and asked in a Nancheng dialect, “Boss, how would you like your hair done?”

    Shen Maomao’s shoulders trembled slightly as she held back her laughter and plopped down on the chair. “Dye it golden yellow for me, or a dreamy purple!”

    Lou Jingmo said while mixing the cream, “Boss, those colors might not be suitable for you.”

    Shen Maomao: “Then what color suits me? Any recommendations?”

    “I recommend a sweeter color palette for you, like milk tea or light brown. These would better match your looks and temperament.”

    Boss Shen was very easygoing. “Alright, I’ll leave it to you. If you do a good job, I’ll reward you handsomely.”

    Lou Jingmo: “Thank you for your profound grace, my lord.”

    Shen Maomao couldn’t stop shaking with laughter.

    Lou Jingmo followed the steps she found on Baidu​21 to apply the cream. After it was done, she helped her wash her hair and then gently blow-dried it.

    Shen Maomao touched her freshly-done milk tea-colored hair and couldn’t help but give Lou Jingmo a thumbs-up. “Lou-jie, with skills like these, if you can’t sell your books in the future, you won’t starve opening a hair-dyeing shop.”

    Lou Jingmo slapped her on the back of the head.

    The better part of the afternoon was spent in Shen Maomao’s enthusiastic selfie session. Lou Jingmo was reluctantly pulled in to make up the numbers, and they took over a hundred photos in various poses and locations. Only then did Shen Maomao’s enthusiasm wane slightly, and she curled up on the sofa to drink her milk tea and watch a horror movie with Lou Jingmo.

    Just as they got to a scary part, a phone suddenly rang, startling Shen Maomao so much she shivered and almost passed away on the spot.

    Lou Jingmo reached out and stroked her head. “If you’re scared, why don’t you stop watching?”

    Shen Maomao angrily pulled out her phone. “I’d like to see who’s so clueless as to call me at a time like—”

    Her voice died abruptly.

    Lou Jingmo raised an eyebrow. “Who is it?”

    Shen Maomao showed her the phone screen.

    Lou Jingmo’s expression turned cold instantly.

    Because on the phone were four large characters: Ren Yue SIM 2.

    Shen Maomao: “Fuck, I remember now. I blocked her commonly used number, but I forgot she had a backup number.”

    She hadn’t even gotten around to settling scores with Ren Yue, so how dare she come knocking on her door looking for a scolding?

    TOC

    Footnotes

    1. Hanzi: 白眼. Pinyin: báiyǎn. Explanation: Literally “white eyes.” The act of turning the eyes upward so that the whites show, a gesture of contempt, annoyance, or exasperation. It is the direct equivalent of an eye-roll.
    2. Hanzi: 肾虚. Pinyin: shènxū. Explanation: A concept in Traditional Chinese Medicine translated as “kidney deficiency.” It doesn’t refer to a kidney disease in the Western medical sense, but rather a deficiency in the body’s vital essence or “qi.” In modern colloquial language, it is often associated with low energy, fatigue, and a weak libido or poor sexual stamina.
    3. Hanzi: 韭菜. Pinyin: jiǔcài. Explanation: Chinese leeks or garlic chives. In Traditional Chinese Medicine and popular belief, they are considered a “warming” food that boosts “yang” energy and can act as an aphrodisiac, hence the suggestion to “nourish the kidneys.”
    4. Hanzi: 达摩克利斯之剑. Pinyin: Dámó kè lì sī zhī jiàn. Explanation: The Sword of Damocles. This is a direct reference to the Greek parable, signifying a constant, imminent peril.
    5. Hanzi: 没心没肺. Pinyin: méixīnméifèi. Explanation: A Chinese idiom (chengyu) that literally translates to “no heart and no lungs.” It is used to describe someone who is carefree, simple-minded, thoughtless, or oblivious, often in a way that seems insensitive.
    6. Hanzi: 骚. Pinyin: sāo. Explanation: A versatile slang term. Its original meaning is “lewd” or “lascivious,” but it has evolved to mean “flirty,” “coquettish,” “showy,” or “flamboyant” in a stylish or skillful way. Here, it refers to Lou Jingmo’s charming and flirtatious action.
    7. Hanzi: 街. Pinyin: jiē. Explanation: The Chinese word for “street.” Using the pinyin “gai” in this manner is a form of internet slang, often used for humorous or stylish effect.
    8. Hanzi: 洗剪吹. Pinyin: xǐ jiǎn chuī. Explanation: Literally “wash, cut, blow-dry,” the standard services at a hair salon. The term also became internet slang to describe a particular flashy, often considered tacky, hairstyle and fashion aesthetic popular in the 2000s.
    9. Hanzi: 《死神来了》. Pinyin: “Sǐshén Láile.” Explanation: The Chinese title for the American horror film series “Final Destination,” which literally translates to “The God of Death Has Come.”
    10. Hanzi: 康康. Pinyin: kāng kāng. Explanation: Internet slang for 看看 (kànkan), meaning “to have a look.” It’s a cute, phonetic variation.
    11. Hanzi: 仙女下凡. Pinyin: xiānnǚ xiàfán. Explanation: A common Chinese compliment, literally “a fairy descending to the mortal world.” It is used to praise someone’s extraordinary beauty, as if they are a celestial being.
    12. Hanzi: 头发越粉，骂人越狠. Pinyin: tóufǎ yuè fěn, màrén yuè hěn. Explanation: A popular piece of modern Chinese internet slang. It humorously suggests that people with pink hair have a surprisingly sharp tongue or aggressive personality, playing on the contrast between the “cute” color and a “fierce” attitude.
    13. Hanzi: 安利. Pinyin: ānlì. Explanation: The Chinese name for the multi-level marketing company “Amway.” Due to the company’s sales methods, its name has become a popular internet slang term meaning “to passionately recommend” or “to try to sell someone on” an idea, product, or hobby.
    14. Hanzi: 飘了. Pinyin: piāo le. Explanation: A popular internet slang term that literally means “to float.” It is used to describe someone who has become arrogant, cocky, or has gotten ahead of themselves due to success or praise.
    15. Hanzi: 找别的狗了. Pinyin: zhǎo bié de gǒu le. Explanation: A slang expression. “Dog” (狗 gǒu) is often used in internet slang to refer to people, particularly in the context of relationships (e.g., 单身狗 dānshēn gǒu, “single dog”). Here, it’s a playful way of accusing someone of cheating or finding another partner.
    16. Hanzi: 鸭血粉丝. Pinyin: yā xuè fěnsī. Explanation: A traditional Chinese snack or light meal, popular in regions like Nanjing. It consists of a soup base with solidified duck blood, vermicelli noodles, and various offal like duck liver and intestines.
    17. Hanzi: 芋泥啵啵奶茶. Pinyin: yù ní bō bō nǎichá. Explanation: A popular type of bubble tea. 芋泥 (yù ní) is taro paste. 啵啵 (bō bō) is a specific type of tapioca pearl, often brown sugar-flavored, known for its chewy texture. 奶茶 (nǎichá) is milk tea.
    18. Hanzi: 塑料情侣. Pinyin: sùliào qínglǚ. Explanation: An internet slang term for a “plastic couple.” It describes a relationship that appears superficial or fake. It is often used humorously and ironically by genuine couples to describe their playful bickering or squabbles.
    19. Hanzi: mua. Pinyin: mua. Explanation: An onomatopoeia for the sound of a kiss, widely used in Chinese internet culture and texting. It is equivalent to “smack” or “mwah.”
    20. Hanzi: 准备上路吧. Pinyin: zhǔnbèi shànglù ba. Explanation: This is a pun. The literal translation is “prepare to set off on a journey/hit the road.” However, 上路 (shànglù) is also a common euphemism for “to go to one’s death” or “to begin the journey to the afterlife.” Given the life-or-death context, Lou Jingmo is making a dark joke.
    21. LP: The source text used 摆渡 (Bǎidù), meaning “ferry,” which is a likely typo for the search engine 百度 (Bǎidù), “Baidu.”

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