Peaches and Plums Don’t Speak – Chapter 50

My One and Two are All You

The days of the High School Entrance Exam​¹ in mid-June burned with the heat of midsummer.

Grandma Liu’s grandson had only just started kindergarten, so she treated Anzhi’s exam with the utmost seriousness, as if awaiting a great battle. Early that morning, while Anzhi was eating breakfast, she checked all of her things and nagged her endlessly.

            

“If you need to go to the bathroom, you must tell the teacher. Don’t hold it in, and don’t be nervous. Oh, does your stomach hurt? I put some warm brown sugar water​² in a thermos for you, it’s not too hot. Also, also, if there’s air conditioning in the classroom and it’s too cold, you have to tell the teacher…”

Anzhi listened, feeling a little embarrassed.

Yan Xi, listening from the side, felt that Grandma Liu had covered everything she could and couldn’t have thought of.

            

At a quarter past seven, Grandma Liu was already rushing them out the door. Although the school was close, she was afraid they would get stuck in traffic.

They arrived at the school gate at 7:45. Just as Grandma Liu had predicted, many parents were already standing there, seizing the last moments to give their children final instructions.

The sky was a brilliant blue, the sun was shining, and the clouds looked like dollops of cream.

            

Anzhi wasn’t in the best of spirits. She was a bit tired, and while her stomach hadn’t hurt yesterday, a dull, heavy ache had started this morning. It was an unfamiliar feeling.

Yan Xi studied her expression and took out some medicine. “Just in case, you should take one.”

She had still been worried yesterday, so she’d gone to the hospital to find Yan Yinan and had him pull some strings to get a prescription from a gynecologist. He had repeatedly assured her that it was an imported medicine with no side effects whatsoever.

            

Anzhi took the pill. “I’m going in then,” she said.

Yan Xi nodded.

The first subject was Chinese, from 8:30 to 11:00, a full two and a half hours.

            

To be honest, Yan Xi was the one who felt a little nervous. But then she remembered that Anzhi had taken the primary-to-junior-high transition exam​³ when she was not even ten and had placed fifth in the entire city. This time would surely be no problem. It was just that too many things had happened recently: Tao Zhenzhen’s return, Anzhi’s fever, and now her period…

The worries Yan Xi had put down resurfaced.

By the time the exam started, the scorching sun was high in the sky. Yan Xi, wearing sunglasses, stood in the shade of the trees and answered her phone.

            

From First Brother: “Anzhi has her exam today, right? Mmm… taking it at just thirteen… who knows if those two brats of mine will even pass their grade. Girls are still the best…”

From Yan Yinan: “Hahahaha, the sun’s so strong, there’s no way I’m going out…”

From Liu Yiyi: “Are you stupid? Find a cool place… What? No way I’m going… That’s too much work!”

            

Yan Xi: “…”

Isn’t the child taking the exam inside the one who’s having a hard time? Shouldn’t you all be concerned about the child?

At a quarter past ten, Anzhi walked out. Watched by a crowd of parents, she casually answered a few questions from some curious ones. Yan Xi saw her listless expression, looking completely drained, and didn’t ask how she did. She just drove them straight home.

            

The moment they got back, Grandma Liu came over with damp towels for them to wipe their faces. She asked if Anzhi was hungry or tired, then turned to Yan Xi. “Xiao Yan, your face is all red from the sun. Hurry and get some rest.”

Anzhi turned to look. It was indeed a bit red.

A little while later, they started lunch. Grandma Liu had prepared iced lemon tea for Yan Xi.

            

Anzhi couldn’t drink it and stared longingly as Yan Xi took a sip. Yan Xi curved her lips into a smile, glanced toward Grandma Liu in the kitchen, and started to move the glass toward Anzhi.

Anzhi’s eyes blinked, and she shyly started to reach for it.

“Xiao Yan!” Grandma Liu walked over and saw them.

            

Well, so much for that.

After lunch, Anzhi fell asleep on the sofa on the second floor. When Yan Xi went up, the electric fan was turning lazily. She saw Anzhi lying on her side, her feet so pale and delicate they were almost translucent. She looked like a quiet little rabbit, sleeping soundly.

The afternoon exam was Physics. Just as Anzhi was about to go in, she turned and ran back to Yan Xi, telling her to wait somewhere else, at least in a coffee shop with air conditioning.

            

Before Yan Xi could say anything, Anzhi puffed up her cheeks. “If you don’t go, I’ll turn in my paper in half an hour and come out.”

A while later, Yan Xi was sitting comfortably in a coffee shop, wondering why she had been so foolish that morning. And all those other parents, too, just standing foolishly at the gate, even though there was nothing they could do to help.

Just then, she received another call. It was, surprisingly, from Yan Yixi.

            

“Anzhi’s out, right?”

“Second Brother… what are you talking about? It’s only been half an hour.”

“That’s enough.”

            

“Second Brother… you’re not allowed to turn in your paper before thirty minutes have passed… This is the High School Entrance Exam.”

“Oh. Well, for the sake of the exam, she can take an extra ten minutes.”

Yan Xi: “…”

            

Another half an hour later, Anzhi came to find her.

She looked a little helpless, as if she had been cornered by the parents at the gate again.

Yan Xi couldn’t help but ask, “How was it?”

            

Anzhi’s face was calm. “No problem. I checked it several times.”

Yan Xi: “…”

During lunch the next day, Anzhi finally managed to sneak a sip of iced lemon tea. Yan Xi held the glass, controlling it carefully, and fed her a single mouthful.

            

After the English exam on the third day, they were finally free. Even the air seemed to hum with cheers. The school gate was a sea of people, buzzing with noise. Yan Xi, wearing a long dress, stood out dazzlingly in the crowd. Anzhi ran toward her, and Yan Xi watched her approach with a smile in her eyes.

It was just like the first day of school, when she had also stood at the gate waiting for her.

Anzhi remembered how excited she had been back then, jogging all the way. But she hadn’t run into her arms. In that instant, she felt a sudden impulse to throw herself into Yan Xi’s embrace.

            

But that wasn’t her. As she got closer, she instinctively stopped.

“Let’s go. We’ll get something to eat,” Yan Xi said, patting her shoulder.

They went for grilled fish. Since Anzhi couldn’t eat spicy food, Yan Xi ordered a garlic-flavored grilled Qingjiang fish. She also ordered spicy shredded tripe and cold jelly noodles as appetizers, along with the iced lemon tea Anzhi had been craving for days, her favorite purple sweet potato rolls, and chestnut and green pea rolls.

            

The tip of Anzhi’s nose beaded with sweat as she ate, utterly delighted.

Seeing how happy she was, Yan Xi barely ate herself, instead focusing on putting food on Anzhi’s plate.

“How about I sign you up for a tour group? You and Yang Mengmeng could go to Shanghai. You can look around, and there’s Disneyland. Then you wouldn’t have to go to Hong Kong.”

            

“Hmm… Aren’t you going?”

Yan Xi took a bite of a purple sweet potato roll. “I’m out of vacation days.”

Anzhi said, “Mengmeng might have to go back to her hometown. She won’t have time to go with me.”

            

“Ah, is that so…”

“I’m fine at home. I can finally read all the novels at home.” Anzhi thought of Yan Xi’s two walls of bookshelves.

“Pfft, you have more than two months. Won’t you be bored?” Yan Xi laughed.

            

“No, I can wait for you to come home…” Anzhi was practically wiggling her feet.

Yan Xi paused for a moment, then raised her eyebrows and smiled. Anzhi, slow on the uptake, felt her face grow warm.

Yan Xi teased her, “You can’t be so clingy, you know.” She took a bite of fish.

            

Anzhi lowered her head and said nothing.

During their meal, someone came over to greet Yan Xi. Anzhi looked up and saw an elegant and handsome man. As he spoke, he smiled and glanced at her before saying to Yan Xi, “What a coincidence to run into you here.”

When he smiled, two very deep dimples appeared.

            

She looked at Yan Xi, who said “Ah,” and nodded at him. “What a coincidence, Director Liao.”

“I’m here with some friends. We’ve already finished eating.” The man called “Director Liao” was followed by two other male friends.

Yan Xi nodded to them and greeted each one.

            

“This is Anzhi,” she introduced.

Director Liao turned to smile at her and said a few words of encouragement that adults always say to children. Then he exchanged a few more words with Yan Xi before leaving. They seemed to be very familiar with each other.

“He’s a colleague from work,” Yan Xi told her.

            

Anzhi didn’t really have a concept of what finishing the high school entrance exam and moving on to high school meant. To her, it was just moving from one school to another. But she had a faint feeling that Yan Xi wasn’t as strict with her as before. Especially after her first period, Yan Xi seemed to be starting to see her as an adult. She had given Anzhi full control of her phone, given her a supplementary card, and no longer placed obvious restrictions on her reading or computer time, leaving it all for her to manage.

When she was nine, Yan Xi had made her sleep alone. After she started junior high, she rarely hugged her anymore, only patting her on the head. The thought made Anzhi feel a pang of loss.

When the scores were released, Anzhi wasn’t surprised at all. 538. The full score was 540.

            

The average admission score for the Affiliated High School of the University of Science and Technology was around 490, so there was no problem.

Anzhi hurried to ask Yang Mengmeng for her score.

Yang Mengmeng had also done very well, with a 507. She should be able to get in. Anzhi felt relieved and said with a smile, “Let’s go shopping one day, okay?”

            

Yang Mengmeng’s expression was solemn and dejected. “I can’t go to the affiliated high school with you,” she said.

Yang Mengmeng’s father’s business hadn’t been doing well this year, and the elderly members of their family were in poor health. They had decided to move back to their hometown, so naturally, Yang Mengmeng had to go back there for school. Fortunately, her exam results were excellent, so she would be able to get into a good high school back home. But this meant she and Anzhi had to be separated.

Things don’t go as planned. Anzhi once again tasted the meaning of those words.

            

The summer vacation was soon coming to an end. Anzhi went to the high-speed rail station to see Yang Mengmeng off. Yang Mengmeng was in low spirits; her mother had to drag her through buying tickets and security. They were short on time and should have been hurrying to the platform to find their train car. But Yang Mengmeng turned her head and saw Anzhi standing there alone, watching her, and burst into tears.

“Waaah!”

“I’m sorry…” She had broken her promise.

            

When she started crying, Anzhi couldn’t hold back either and began rubbing her eyes. The two children stood there, separated by the security gate, wailing. A group of baffled adults surrounded them. Yang Mengmeng’s mother awkwardly pulled at her arm. “What are you crying for? You can call, you can video chat, you have WeChat. It’s not like you’ll never see each other again…”

“An’an, An’an…” Yang Mengmeng, her face red from crying, was dragged away by her mother.

Yan Xi found Anzhi by a fountain in a park not far from their home. It was evening, and she was sitting there alone, head bowed, perfectly still. She looked exactly like she had all those years ago when Yan Xi first saw her at the kindergarten gate.

            

A sharp pain shot through Yan Xi’s chest. For a moment, she felt that Anzhi was still that tiny child. In the next, she thought that perhaps growing up was just this cruel, that perhaps everything we cherish will leave us one by one. Often, fate uses the act of “losing” to remind us how important it is to cherish what we have.

Perhaps she needed to learn this sooner, but Yan Xi would rather she never had to.

When Yan Xi sat down beside her, Anzhi looked up, the sadness in her eyes unfocused. Yan Xi handed her an ice cream cone. She had already peeled back most of the paper, revealing the purple taro ice cream, which was covered in chocolate sprinkles.

            

Anzhi took it, stunned. Yan Xi reached out and stroked her head.

Anzhi took a bite, and a tear rolled down her cheek.

“A long time ago, my grandfather told me something. He said, ‘In life, unsatisfactory things are eight or nine out of ten…’” Yan Xi paused, then continued, “So, we can only often think of the one or two. If we think about the ‘one or two,’ maybe we can find the courage and confidence to keep living.”​⁴

            

Tears plopped down Anzhi’s face. After a long moment, she let out a soft “mhm” and continued to eat her ice cream.

In life, unsatisfactory things are eight or nine out of ten, so one must often think of the one or two. My ‘one’ is you, and my ‘two’ is still you.

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The author has something to say:

            

Nowadays, you can’t turn in your paper early and leave the school during the High School Entrance Exam. I remember that many years ago, it was possible in some cities. But to be more rigorous, Anzhi leaving early is a plot device, so please don’t take it too seriously.

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