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    Chapter Index

    Before Setting Out for War

    With frequent unrest in the Northwest and large swathes of the populace fleeing, the imperial edict to suppress the rebellion was finally issued.

    The one leading the troops this time was General Guide. Jiang Yao recognized her; she was a rare woman from a humble background who could read, write, and practice martial arts. With a pair of sabers, she had slain countless enemies, fighting her way step by step to her current position.

    Jiang Yao held a measure of respect for her.

    …

    The closer the matter loomed, the more flustered Song Muyun became. Jiang Yao hadn’t mentioned what she should do, but… she had given her a lot of money. She had given her almost all her bottom-of-the-chest silver;1 box after box of bank notes was delivered into her hands, along with property deeds, all without hesitation.

    This left Muyun feeling extremely flustered, unable to guess her meaning, as Jiang Yao had never explicitly stated it.

    It wasn’t until after they made love one day, lying drenched in sweat on the bed, that Jiang Yao, ignoring the sticky perspiration on their bodies, insisted on holding Song Muyun. Her slightly calloused palm gently caressed Song Muyun’s back, again and again.

    The young lady blushed and, with a soft whimper, refused to let her touch anymore. Then she raised her arms to hook them around Jiang Yao’s neck, just in time to hear her say, β€œWhen you were looking at the account books during the day, did you see the new income from the shops?”

    Song Muyun, having just been pleasured, still sounded a little languid. β€œMhm,” she replied. β€œThey said it will be delivered tomorrow.”

    Jiang Yao hugged Song Muyun tighter. β€œThat money is for you, too. Keep it and buy whatever you like. You don’t have to save money for me.”

    Song Muyun’s body suddenly stiffened.

    Jiang Yao had already forced so much money on her. Why was she giving her more?

    Why did she always tell her to buy whatever she liked?

    What was she going to do with so much money? Wasn’t Jiang Yao here?

    Jiang Yao would buy things for her. Whatever she wanted, Jiang Yao would buy.

    A sudden sense of dread washed over the young lady, as if something had just been confirmed. She abruptly gripped Jiang Yao’s arm. β€œYou still want to go alone, without taking me, don’t you?”

    For the first time, her eyes were so heavy, so fierce-looking, that it startled Jiang Yao.

    Jiang Yao knew she was angry. She bit her lip but remained firm. β€œI’ll just be a nameless nobody over there, a common soldier. How could I possibly take you with me? You’re usually the one who cares most about rules. You should know this is highly against the rules, shouldn’t you?”

    The young lady pressed her lips together and said coldly, β€œThen I’ll just hire a carriage and follow behind you.”

    Jiang Yao’s head ached. How could she dare let her do that? β€œMy little ancestor,2 how could you dare travel so far without me by your side? I’ll have a superior officer above me. I won’t be able to look after you then. If anything happens to you, wouldn’t that be stabbing me in the heart?”

    β€œYou’re going off to war alone, leaving me at home where I can’t even see you, worrying about you day after day. That’s stabbing me in the heart!”

    …

    Jiang Yao was at a loss for words and could only insist, β€œNo matter what you say, it’s not happening. You’ll stay at home. I’ll ask Father and Mother to take good care of you. You can hang out with Ru’er, or you can go out and make some new friends. How about that?”

    Jiang Yao pleaded earnestly, only to receive a cold-faced β€œNo” from Muyun.

    β€œβ€˜No’ is not an option. War isn’t a game. I can’t possibly take you.”

    Jiang Yao’s brow furrowed tightly, her words decisive and absolute, leaving no room for negotiation.

    Song Muyun stared fiercely into her eyes. When she saw the resolve within them, her emotions began to crumble.

    She wasn’t afraid of dying, nor was she afraid of following Jiang Yao onto the battlefield. But she was afraid of not being able to see Jiang Yao, afraid that Jiang Yao would get hurt somewhere she didn’t know, afraid that she wouldn’t take care of her own body.

    A moment later, the sweat-dampened woman got out of bed and, without a word, went straight to the bathing chamber. After she finished bathing, she returned, pulled a new quilt over to the soft couch, and lay down.

    She was actually going to sleep separately from Jiang Yao.

    Jiang Yao was shocked!

    She craned her neck to look at Muyun but couldn’t see her expression at all, only her cold, distant back.

    The window wasn’t fully closed; she had propped it open a little. The lustrous moonlight streamed in from outside. As Song Muyun gazed at Hengwu Courtyard shrouded in the night, the more she looked, the sadder she felt, and she wanted to cry. She couldn’t help but let out soft whimpers.

    Her crying made Jiang Yao’s heart ache as if it were being sliced by a dull knife.

    When a maidservant came in to change the water and heard her madam crying, she didn’t dare to even lift her head.

    Only after she finished and left did she dare to gather with her sisters and discuss in hushed tones. Could it be that the Young Miss had too much energy, and Madam couldn’t take it, which was why she had fled to another bed to cry?

    As soon as this speculation was voiced, it immediately received the approval of the others. β€œThe Young Miss has loved to play since she was a child, and she’s so strong. She must have bullied Madam.”

    β€œThe Young Miss even stayed in a military camp before. I heard those coarse men in the barracks often like to talk about such indecent things. The Young Miss must have been corrupted by them.”

    β€œHeavens, really? Our Madam is such a delicate woman. If the Young Miss learned the ways of those brutes from the barracks, Madam won’t be able to stand it.”

    β€œIsn’t that why Madam is crying in secret?”

    β€œShe must have been bullied by the Young Miss until she couldn’t bear it anymore!” one maidservant concluded.

    The other maids chimed in, quietly blaming their Young Miss for not knowing how to pity the fragrance and cherish the jade,3 especially when Madam was so beautiful and deserving of affection.

    Inside the room, Jiang Yao, who was unwittingly shouldering the blame for this massive “black pot,”4 was completely unaware. She hastily finished her bath and ran out to find her wife.

    Song Muyun’s sobs hadn’t stopped. She cried softly, her eyes slightly red. Jiang Yao’s heart ached terribly. She couldn’t help but cover her body, and just as she was about to kiss her, she was thrown off.

    Jiang Yao: …

    It was fine. This was expected.

    She sighed, reached a hand under the quilt to hold Song Muyun’s, and found it cool and smooth.

    The hand only stayed in her palm for a moment before its owner snatched it away.

    Song Muyun’s expression was displeased. She spoke in an extremely hoarse voice, β€œDon’t touch me. Since you don’t want me, don’t touch me.”

    Her temperament was incredibly fierce. Jiang Yao had only said she was enlisting and might be gone for a few months, but to her, that already meant she was being abandoned.

    Jiang Yao explained helplessly, β€œIt’s not that I don’t want you. I’m just afraid you’ll be in danger.”

    β€œThose four Shadow Guards you gave me, are they dead?”

    Up in the rafters, the two pairs of Shadow Guards couldn’t help but glance at each other upon hearing this, then resumed their watch, eyes checking their noses, noses checking their hearts,5 carefully observing their surroundings.

    β€œIf something really happened, I’m afraid they wouldn’t be able to protect you.”

    If Muyun went, she would probably be so worried she wouldn’t be able to sleep night after night.

    β€œYou’re always saying something will happen to me, something will happen to me. Can’t you think of something good for a change?”

    β€œI always have to consider the worst-case scenario. What if it happens, Muyun?”

    Jiang Yao sighed again. β€œI’m really scared something will happen to you.”

    The military camp was a restricted area, so Muyun naturally couldn’t enter. But leaving her in the city, she wouldn’t feel at ease either.

    After all, it was near another country. What if some people tried to fish in troubled waters, some traitors or spies, and hurt Muyun? What would she do then?

    She couldn’t accept Muyun suffering even the slightest injury or hardship.

    The person was now hers to raise. She only hoped Muyun could be well, to be held in the palm of her hand forever, and never have to experience the pain of the past again.

    β€œWhat’s there to be afraid of? I’m not afraid. I’m only afraid that you’ll get hurt in a place I don’t know about, and I won’t even be able to see you!”

    β€œI won’t get hurt. I’ll write to you. I’ll write to you every day, okay?”

    During wartime, the price for the postal service to deliver a single letter was often very high. It could soar from a few taels of silver per letter to over a hundred before anyone would deliver it.

    But thankfully, Jiang Yao had nothing if not money.

    She had to write to her baby. Not taking her was already bullying her enough. If she left her all alone on top of that, Jiang Yao couldn’t imagine how angry Muyun would be. If their roles were reversed, she would be just as angry.

    Of course, she generally wouldn’t be willing to stay behind. She would definitely follow Muyun wherever she went, especially to the most dangerous places.

    It was only because the capital was safe now that she had no choice but to leave Song Muyun behind.

    They both knew in their hearts that this was for the best.

    But Song Muyun wouldn’t accept it. She was already so angry she was lashing out at her with her claws.

    Jiang Yao could only endure it helplessly, and then she discovered that while those claws looked sharp, they didn’t hurt at all when they landed on her.

    Even this angry, she couldn’t bear to hurt her. Really…

    Jiang Yao’s heart felt incredibly warm. She finally reached out and gathered the flailing little cat in her arms, listening to her sob and curse, β€œWho wants your money? Who wants you to write letters? If you leave, if you abandon me, I’ll just consider you dead. What letters? I won’t read them. Let go! Who said you could hug me? I’m never speaking to you again! QAQ”

    Muyun was crying and making a huge fuss. Jiang Yao let her cry however she wanted, but she wouldn’t let her leave her embrace.

    Crying and crying, she eventually tired herself out. Her voice gradually softened, and at some point, she fell into a deep sleep in her arms.

    Jiang Yao looked down at her exquisitely beautiful face and reached out to rub her slightly swollen eyelids.

    She didn’t go back to the bed either, but instead squeezed onto the soft couch with her and slept just like that.

    The couch was narrow, and she couldn’t quite stretch out. She ended up pressing Muyun against the window, then held her tightly.

    The next morning, Jiang Yao was woken by a feeling of weightlessness.

    No matter how skilled she was in martial arts, she couldn’t fight the fact that she was already in mid-air when she woke up. In a few moments, she crashed to the floor, the impact making her see stars, completely bewildered.

    She saw a pair of worried eyes appear urgently on the soft couch, but the worry only lasted for a moment. Seeing that she was fine, the eyes filled with coldness again, so quickly that she thought that fleeting moment of concern was her imagination.

    Jiang Yao: …

    The little lady sure had two faces.6

    She lay on the floor with her limbs splayed out and heard a deliberately cold female voice from above, β€œSince you don’t want to take me, don’t touch me. I don’t want to talk to you either.”

    …

    β€œOh, I can’t touch you. Can I talk to you, then?”

    Jiang Yao tilted her head and asked innocently.

    Seeing that she was actually about to agree, Muyun’s expression changed, and she shot her a vicious glare. β€œNo, no, no! You’re not allowed to talk to me! I don’t want to talk to you! From now on, this is my bed. You’re not allowed on it again!”

    Jiang Yao: …

    Her wife was gone from her arms, she couldn’t talk to her wife, and now even her right to share a bed with her wife had been revoked.

    Her life was so bitter.

    Bitter, but she still agreed, and proved with her actions that she absolutely would not be taking Muyun with her.

    Song Muyun’s lips trembled with anger. She ignored Jiang Yao and raised a hand to pour herself a cup of tea to calm down, but she spilled more than half of it on her thin, snow-white inner robe.

    The inner robe clung to her skin, becoming somewhat transparent.

    The young lady was fuming. She gripped the teacup tightly. After a good while, she finally couldn’t hold it in anymore and hurled the cup forcefully to the ground.

    Jiang Yao had already fetched a clean handkerchief and was silently dabbing at the wet spot on her chest.

    When she dabbed at the red fruit that was normally most off-limits, Song Muyun abruptly recoiled, covering her chest. β€œYou, what are you doing? Who said you could touch me? I don’t want you to touch me.”

    Her clear eyes held a faint anger. Jiang Yao looked completely innocent, and with the order not to speak to her, she could only silently hand the handkerchief to Song Muyun.

    Song Muyun wouldn’t take it. She took out her own handkerchief to wipe her clothes.

    With Jiang Yao not speaking, the room suddenly became much quieter, which she wasn’t used to either.

    After a good while, she finally raised her eyes to look at Jiang Yao.

    Jiang Yao had an excellent temper. Even after being treated like this, she still looked at her with eyes as gentle as water.

    Song Muyun bit her lip tightly, suddenly feeling that she had gone too far.

    Jiang Yao was only thinking of her, afraid she would be in danger… yet she had gotten angry with her over it, ignored her, been fierce with her, and even pushed her out of bed. She was the one who was being unreasonable.

    The young lady’s eyes filled with tears. She wanted to throw herself into Jiang Yao’s arms, to tell her she couldn’t bear to part with her, that she was worried about her, but…

    She had already spoken such fierce, harsh words just now.

    And when did Jiang Yao become so obedient? She said she would ignore her and told her not to speak to her, and she really stopped talking to her?

    The young lady angrily pounded the bed, thinking, Does this Jiang Yao have even half a shred of true feeling for me?

    But before she could land a second blow, her hand was gently taken and tucked into Jiang Yao’s own embrace, preventing her from continuing to mistreat herself like that.

    Song Muyun looked up, her eyes misty and filled with grievance.

    Jiang Yao’s heart softened, but she still didn’t speak, merely using her other hand to pat her head.

    Song Muyun’s voice was sullen. β€œDidn’t I tell you not to touch me? Why are you still touching me?”

    She waited for a while but received no reply. Jiang Yao maintained that gentle demeanor. A moment later, she even let go of her hand. The young lady got angry and pushed Jiang Yao again. This time, Jiang Yao was awake and prepared, so naturally, she wasn’t pushed off.

    β€œYou don’t listen when I tell you not to touch me, but I also told you not to talk to me, so why are you listening so well to that?!”

    Muyun was about to die from anger. Small, aggrieved teardrops welled up in her eyes and fell one by one.

    Seeing her cry, Jiang Yao frantically wiped her tears and finally spoke. β€œDon’t cry, don’t cry, my little ancestor. It’s just that not touching you is too hard. Not talking is simpler. Don’t cry, don’t cry. Just tell me what you want me to do. I’ll agree to anything, except for taking you to Linjiang City.”

    Jiang Yao held Song Muyun’s hand again, promising.

    Song Muyun was furious. If she couldn’t go with her, what was the use of anything else?

    Jiang Yao had already given her entire fortune to her. What else could she possibly want?

    The young lady bit her lip and abruptly turned her head away.

    And so, the servants of Hengwu Courtyard discovered that the weather had changed.

    From some point on, a rift seemed to have formed between their Madam and Young Miss. For days on end, Madam ignored the Young Miss, her face cold as ice. In her spare time, she would read books or look at account ledgersβ€”anything but look at the Young Miss.

    The Young Miss would sit pitifully nearby every day, but she wouldn’t receive so much as a glance. As a result, even the servants held their breath, not daring to make a sound. It was truly a pitiful sight.

    While she was living this pitiful life, her father, far from feeling sorry for her, often mocked her.

    This was truly a case of what is tolerable versus what is intolerable. But considering that after she left, Muyun would still need her family’s care, she had to tolerate it, and tolerate it again, and a third time.

    No one besides them knew that Murong Ci was a woman. Therefore, after learning that his daughter had decided to marry Murong Ci, Jiang Zhi invited Murong Ci to the residence every day to practice martial arts, nearly working her to the point of collapse.

    She wanted to find Jiang Yao to complain about her hardships, but the moment she saw Jiang Yao’s face, which looked like someone owed her tens of thousands of taels of silver, she didn’t dare say a word.

    These hardships were all things she ought to bear.

    Murong Ci took a deep breath, and by the time she returned to Jiang Zhi’s courtyard, her face was once again wreathed in a reverent smile.

    She now regarded Jiang Zhi as the person she admired most in the world, so naturally, she had to put on a good act.


    About to enlist in the army, Jiang Yao was also extremely busy these days. Aside from deliberately hanging around in front of Muyun to attract some of her attention, she spent all her time at the training camp.

    With Jiang Zhi’s status, he could naturally pull some strings to get her a position as a Captain or something, but that would be too unfair to others.

    General Guide’s name was Wen Yueyu. She felt that if Wen Yueyu could reach her current position, so could she.

    In the beginning, Wen Yueyu had also enlisted from a humble background, climbing her way up from the very bottom step by step. She was the only female general in the current dynasty to have come from a common family.

    After training ended for the day, Jiang Yao was walking out when she was suddenly stopped by a cool, indifferent voice. β€œJiang Yao.”

    She turned around instinctively and met Wen Yueyu’s calm eyes.

    Wen Yueyu asked, β€œMay I treat you to a meal?”

    Jiang Yao was taken aback. She already had a favorable impression of Wen Yueyu, so she naturally wouldn’t refuse. She nodded at once. β€œSure. Is it just the two of us?”

    Wen Yueyu nodded and made an inviting gesture.

    Knowing it was just the two of them, Jiang Yao hesitated for a moment, but in the end, she followed.

    It can’t be that this one is also into rubbing mirrors,7 can it? Besides, General Guide was clearly the “top” in a relationship, and she looked the part too. There was no way she would be interested in Jiang Yao, who also identified as such.

    Jiang Yao’s thoughts were in a complete mess. For the first time, she realized she was this kind of person. The woman had clearly just invited her for a meal, and what was she thinking in her head?

    Thinking ill of people behind their backs was not the act of a gentleman. A sin, a sin.

    She repented for a moment before following Wen Yueyu to a restaurant.

    The prices at this restaurant weren’t high, and the portions were decent. Wen Yueyu was different from others; she had no family backing her, so her income was just her monthly stipend. A restaurant like this, neither too good nor too bad, suited her perfectly. She never did things like slapping her face until it was swollen to look imposing.8

    β€œPlease, sit.”

    The female general extended a fair hand in invitation. Jiang Yao sat down accordingly and, when ordering, only chose a pork knuckle.

    Seeing this, Wen Yueyu added two more dishesβ€”a clear-stewed whole chicken and a stuffed tofuβ€”along with two bowls of eel noodle soup. After ordering, before the waiter left, she finally asked Jiang Yao, β€œDo you eat noodles?”

    β€œI do. I eat everything. General, you don’t need to specifically consider me.”

    β€œMhm.”

    General Guide nodded slightly.

    β€œGeneral, is there something you need from me?”

    Seeing Wen Yueyu sitting there with a cold expression, not initiating conversation, Jiang Yao couldn’t help but ask.

    Wen Yueyu nodded lightly but only said, β€œLet’s wait until all the dishes have arrived.”

    It was a tradition among military officers to discuss matters while eating.

    Jiang Yao didn’t mind this at all.

    The food here arrived quite quickly, one dish after another, with the eel noodle soup coming last.

    Jiang Yao slurped a few mouthfuls of noodles first, waiting for Wen Yueyu to speak.

    Wen Yueyu also ate a few bites of her noodles unhurriedly before finally speaking. β€œI hear you help the weak, uphold justice, despise evil, and are not afraid of the powerful. You are a good person.”

    The woman across from her, who was heartily eating her noodles, froze. A hint of suspicion appeared in her eyes. She suspected she had misheard, but Wen Yueyu continued, β€œI admire you very much.”

    Jiang Yao: …

    β€œSo?”

    The corner of her mouth twitched.

    It wasn’t that she was trying to think the worst of people, but Wen Yueyu was being truly bizarre today. They usually barely spoke to each other, and now she was suddenly showering her with praise like this. It was really hard not to let one’s imagination run wild.

    Wen Yueyu picked up a spoon, ladled some soup for herself, and then gestured for Jiang Yao to pass her small soup bowl.

    Jiang Yao, still suspicious, quickly waved her hands and refused. Wen Yueyu didn’t say anything, just took a sip of her soup calmly before continuing, β€œIn the army this time, there are many scions from prominent families, just like you.”

    β€œI know that. The situation in the Northwest isn’t too severe. Their elders all want them to go and earn some military merits so they can be rewarded based on their achievements when they return and snag an official post or two.”

    Wen Yueyu grunted in agreement and put down her soup spoon. This time, she said, β€œI’m afraid I won’t be able to manage so many scions from prominent families.”

    Jiang Yao’s eyes narrowed slightly, and then she understood.

    That was right. Wen Yueyu came from a humble background and had no family to back her. Those scions from prominent families had been arrogant since childhood, with their eyes on the top of their heads. How could they possibly obey her?

    There would definitely be trouble.

    But… why was she coming to her?

    Jiang Yao was still completely bewildered.

    Wen Yueyu seemed to have guessed her confusion and stated frankly, β€œHaving subordinates who are disobedient is an extremely difficult matter to handle. Their backgrounds are a tangled web of power. I can’t truly touch them. And if they don’t listen to my orders, it could lead to unnecessary casualties.”

    As Wen Yueyu spoke, she closed her eyes deeply, as if recalling some past event, looking somewhat grief-stricken.

    Jiang Yao suddenly remembered the rumors about her last campaign. More than half of the troops she had led out were lost. The reason was that a scion from a prominent family had disobeyed orders, greedy for military glory, and had taken some other scions he was friendly with to burn the enemy’s provisions. Not only did they fail to start the fire, but they were tracked by the enemy, who penetrated deep into their own camp and launched a surprise attack. Although they still won in the end, General Guide’s subordinates suffered over fifty percent casualties. It was a pyrrhic victory. In a fit of rage, she had ordered those scions to be tied up on the spot and beaten half to death, then reported the matter to the Emperor.

    But those people had their families to protect them and were still fine to this day, only barred from ever enlisting again. In contrast, Wen Yueyu was resented by the prominent families for injuring them and had not been given a command to lead troops for many years, nor had she received any promotions or rewards.

    β€œSo you’re telling me this because you want me to discipline them?” Jiang Yao guessed.

    Wen Yueyu nodded. β€œI know you are kind-hearted by nature, and all the young masters of the prominent families in the capital are afraid of you. You are the most suitable person for this task, so I wanted to trouble you. If you can keep them in line, the highest merit for this campaign will be yours.”

    She was naturally cold, so even when asking for a favor, her tone was somewhat chilly.

    But Jiang Yao had long heard about her personality; she was even worse at currying favor than her Second Uncle. She didn’t think much of it.

    Originally, the highest merit should belong to the general, but now Wen Yueyu was clearly offering to give it to her.

    Jiang Yao shook her head. β€œThere’s no need for that. Helping you is also helping myself. The sooner we finish the battle, the sooner I can go back. I naturally won’t let that bunch of people run wild. As for the merits, the General should just assign them based on actual contributions.”

    She didn’t care for merits that were handed to her by others. It was just dealing with a few pampered young masters. Wasn’t that a piece of cake? How was that worth someone trading military honors for?

    Hearing Jiang Yao refuse, Wen Yueyu didn’t say anything, but the corner of her mouth curved up imperceptibly. β€œI thank you in advance.”

    She raised her cup and toasted Jiang Yao.

    After the meal, Jiang Yao returned carrying a newly bought chicken soup from the restaurant. The courtyard was silent, with few maidservants walking about, but the room itself was crowded with several of them.

    She frowned and walked in. The maidservant at the door saw her and exclaimed in pleasant surprise, β€œAh, Young Miss is finally back! Madam hasn’t had her evening meal yet. Young Miss, please hurry and persuade her.”

    Jiang Yao looked at the dark sky outside. It was long past dinnertime. She froze, then looked at her personal maidservant who knew her well, asking with her eyes, Is it because of me?

    The personal maidservant understood and nodded gravely, giving her a look that said, You’d best fend for yourself.9

    Jiang Yao: …


    The author has something to say:

    Jiang Yao: I went out to eat with someone else and forgot to tell my wife. My wife didn’t wait for me and is very angry. What should I do? Waiting online, it’s quite urgent.

    I’ve discovered that whether I write six thousand, seven thousand, eight thousand, or nine thousand characters, the update time is about the same…… Why is that QAQ



    Footnotes

    1. Literally β€œbottom of the chest,” referring to one’s most precious savings or dowry, kept safe for emergencies.
    2. A Chinese term of endearment, often used with exasperation for someone who is pampered, demanding, or difficult to handle.
    3. An idiom meaning to be gentle and considerate towards women.
    4. To β€œcarry a black pot” (bei guo) is a Chinese idiom meaning to take the blame or be made a scapegoat for something one didn’t do.
    5. An idiom (yan guan bi, bi guan xin) describing a meditative state of concentration, or in this context, deliberately keeping one’s head down to avoid witnessing an awkward situation.
    6. A reference to how quickly someone’s demeanor changes; implies she acts one way (sweet/worried) one moment and another (cold) the next.
    7. A classical and literary euphemism for sexual relations between women.
    8. A Chinese idiom meaning to do something beyond one’s means in order to look impressive.
    9. From the idiom β€œzi qiu duo fu,” meaning to seek one’s own fortune or to look out for oneself, often said when someone is in a difficult situation.

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