After Transmigrating Into a Book, I Was Played by the Black Lotus – Chapter 44

Muah

This thought flashed through her mind, and Lin Xingzhu didn’t dwell on it any further.

But it still left a trace in the depths of her heart.

She sat chatting with Bai Xiying, watching her pick up and eat the ice cream cubes one by one.

When there were only four or five pieces left, Bai Xiying got up, found a clean container, carefully packed them away, and put them in the refrigerator.

From her actions, Lin Xingzhu detected a sense of reluctance, as if she couldn’t bear to finish them.

She gazed at Bai Xiying, her tone calm, yet filled with an un-dissipating warmth. “If you like it, I’ll make it for you often from now on.”

Bai Xiying turned, the satin hem of her dress blooming like a swaying flower.

“Lin Xingzhu, you’re so good to me.” Her gaze was soft, her face full of emotion.

“…”

Lin Xingzhu found it a little hard to bear the way Bai Xiying looked at her, as if she were her entire world. It made her unable to stop her thoughts from running wild, even giving rise to other extravagant hopes.

She felt that today’s Bai Xiying possessed an indescribable allure; her every move was like a hook, sinking deep into one’s heart.

Lin Xingzhu glanced at the refrigerator. Before Bai Xiying closed the door, she saw a familiar package.

The taste of low-quality cream wasn’t good, but it was cheap. Since the shop used such cream in its products, it meant its target customers were not people like Bai Xiying and Lin Xingzhu.

Therefore, that package in the refrigerator looked completely out of place with everything else around it.

“If you like it, I’ll make it for you to try often when I have time. It doesn’t take much effort anyway,” Lin Xingzhu said, lying through her teeth. “So, you should try to eat less of the kind you buy randomly on the street in the future. Eating too much of that isn’t good for your health.”

Lin Xingzhu didn’t say it directly, but she believed Bai Xiying understood what she was referring to.

She knew Bai Xiying didn’t eat these things because they were cheap, but merely to savor their excessive, cloying sweetness.

Therefore, Lin Xingzhu only said, “…When I make it again, I’ll try to make it extra sweet for you.”

At the very least, for something she made herself, from selecting the ingredients to the finished product, the quality was guaranteed.

She couldn’t just cut off Bai Xiying’s hobby in one go and make her give up things with excessive sugar content, so she could only make them herself to ensure her health.

Bai Xiying offered no rebuttal. “Okay.”

Watching Lin Xingzhu say these gentle, caring words with such a serious expression, her heart felt a surge of sweetness.

She had already found something sweeter than those desserts.

It’s okay if what Lin Xingzhu makes isn’t sweet enough, Bai Xiying thought. I can use something else to make up for it.

Like that pair of gentle and alluring lips, for instance.

She would be more than happy to pluck them herself.

After chatting about this, Lin Xingzhu asked about her competition.

After learning that Bai Xiying was more or less prepared, she felt relieved.

Ever since finding out Bai Xiying had decided to register, Lin Xingzhu had made a special effort to look into it. She learned that after successfully registering for the ASHY competition, there was a portfolio screening process before the main competition. In other words, after registering, you still had to submit a recent work. Only after the judges gave the green light were you considered truly registered.

Therefore, this piece of work was often called the “knocking brick”¹ in past competitions.

Generally speaking, anyone with real skill could pass this stage with ease.

She didn’t know the plot of this part for Bai Xiying in the original book, but Lin Xingzhu guessed that this stage shouldn’t be difficult for her.

After a while, Lin Xingzhu mentioned that she would be resigning from Xingyuan soon.

Bai Xiying was taken aback and pressed, “When was this decided?”

“My dad just told me a few days ago,” Lin Xingzhu said. “I had the same idea myself. I was so unreliable in the past few years that he almost thought I was a lost cause and was even thinking of hiring a professional manager.”

Thinking of this, Lin Xingzhu let out a small laugh. After laughing, she sighed. “He’s gotten a bit older these past two years, and he inevitably has some minor health issues. He’s always thinking about retiring to live a quiet life. I thought about it, and I really shouldn’t run from my responsibilities anymore.”

Listening to this reason, Bai Xiying wasn’t surprised.

In her impression, the Lin Xingzhu before her had always been a responsible person.

But seeing her relaxed and composed demeanor, Bai Xiying could easily guess that her original self had probably long since adapted to such a life.

Or perhaps, her original self was always meant to be a dignified, gentle heiress of a wealthy family.

At this moment, facing the gentle and elegant Lin Xingzhu, gazing at the small mole at the corner of her eye that was uniquely hers, Bai Xiying felt an unprecedented desire to understand everything about her.

This wasn’t the usual interest one has for amusing things; it was a possessiveness and a voyeuristic desire spreading from the depths of her heart. She wanted to understand all of her, to possess all of her.

But along with it came a thread of uncontrollable panic.

If I do this, will Lin Xingzhu want to understand me in the same way?

Can I really open myself up completely, cut open my own bloody self to face her?

Her heart suddenly clenched, as if a stone of immense weight² had suddenly pressed down on it. Bai Xiying found it hard to breathe.

She couldn’t guarantee it at all.

Lin Xingzhu noticed her expression was off, and her own gaze shifted slightly. “What’s wrong?”

She replayed her words in her mind; there was nothing inappropriate.

Bai Xiying shook her head. Just as Lin Xingzhu was about to move closer to check her expression, she turned her head slightly and, with Lin Xingzhu completely unguarded, suddenly reached out and hugged her.

Her delicate, fair chin rested on the rounded point of Lin Xingzhu’s shoulder, and Bai Xiying subconsciously nuzzled against it.

Lin Xingzhu: “…”

Her body suddenly stiffened.

She quickly relaxed. Her raised hand hesitated for a moment before she restrainedly placed it on Bai Xiying’s slender back.

“What’s wrong?”

Her chest vibrated, resonating with the person in her arms.

Bai Xiying didn’t speak, just held her tightly. Lin Xingzhu even felt that her arms were about to leave red marks on her waist.

This was the first time the two of them had embraced while both were sober and clear-headed, but at this moment, Lin Xingzhu’s mind was free of any distracting thoughts.

She just patted Bai Xiying’s back soothingly, letting her hold on as she sorted through her sudden emotions.

Suddenly, Lin Xingzhu’s body stiffened again.

Because Bai Xiying had squirmed.

Her expression was a little complicated. She couldn’t see Bai Xiying’s face, so she didn’t know if Bai Xiying was doing it intentionally or not, but the posture was ultimately improper.

Enduring the awkwardness, Lin Xingzhu felt that enough time had passed. She placed her hands on Bai Xiying’s shoulders and, with a slight push, released her.

At the same time, the smile on Bai Xiying’s lips thinned slightly.

Is Lin Xingzhu a block of wood? Why is she so unmoved no matter what I do?

The initial, sudden flood of emotion was real, but if she were to truly lose control over such a small bit of panic, she wouldn’t be the real Bai Xiying.

Afterward, she was just going with the flow, hoping to get Lin Xingzhu to make a move while holding such warm, fragrant, soft jade³ in her arms. But it was obvious that the other party was like a tall, jade-like green bamboo—verdant and admirable, but excessively stiff and upright.

Not to mention she had even made that little move, but what about Lin Xingzhu? She pulled her away directly!

Bai Xiying silently ground her teeth.

But upon meeting Lin Xingzhu’s unreservedly gentle gaze, the annoyance that had just risen in Bai Xiying was instantly defeated.

Forget it, I won’t bicker with an idiot.

Bai Xiying leaned against the table, fell silent for a timely moment, and then said, “I just suddenly thought of my family.”

“I just remembered, I haven’t gone to see my family in a while.”

Lin Xingzhu was a bit stunned, then immediately realized that the way she had just mentioned her father might have struck a chord with Bai Xiying.

She remembered that Bai Xiying had lost her relatives long ago. The grandmother who had endured countless hardships to raise her had passed away as well.

Such a family setup was actually a perfect fit for the background requirements of a helpless protagonist with no one to turn to in a ‘forced phoenix protagonist’ novel⁴. But when it all became personified and landed on an individual, that short sentence could become a painful wound buried deep in one’s heart, too sensitive to touch.

After all, when one’s most beloved relative passes away, who can truly let go?

But Lin Xingzhu was supposed to be unaware of this, so she just patted the crown of her head with a touch of heartache and said with restraint, “If you miss them, you can go see them when you have time.” [LP: The original text uses “TA,” a written gender-neutral pronoun (tā) that can mean he, she, or it. The translation uses “them” to preserve Lin Xingzhu’s deliberate ambiguity, as she doesn’t know the specifics of Bai Xiying’s family.]

Her words were ambiguous; she suggested visiting instead of calling, a phrasing that was appropriate whether for a living relative or for the grave of one who had passed.

Bai Xiying lowered her head, her eyes seemingly hiding an un-dissipating sorrow.

To think that one day I could actually say I miss that woman?

Bai Xiying sneered inwardly, but since mentioning her could make Lin Xingzhu feel pity, she could, for now, reluctantly endure the nausea in her heart.

Bai Xiying was raised by a relative from a young age. That person was named Han Cuiying⁵, her grandmother.

To outsiders, it seemed Han Cuiying had supported her aging body to raise her, that the grandmother and granddaughter depended on each other for survival and shared a deep bond, but they had no idea of the real story.

From the time Bai Xiying’s memories began, Han Cuiying’s attitude toward her was atrocious; beatings, scoldings, and punishments were commonplace. But she was too good at putting on an act. In front of outsiders, she would shower Bai Xiying with concern, but the moment the door closed at home, her true nature would erupt.

When she was little, Bai Xiying didn’t understand. She thought her grandmother was just too heartbroken, and that seeing her would often stir up sad feelings.

After all, she had been in the accident with her mom and dad, but she was the only one who survived.

But when she grew up, she learned that Han Cuiying was malicious and had not a shred of kindness in her heart. Back when the accident happened, because Bai Xiying’s father and mother were killed in a car accident, the other party paid a large sum in compensation. Han Cuiying took it all, yet claimed to the public that she hadn’t received any money, hiding it away for some unknown purpose.

Even worse, when Bai Xiying had grown a little older and her features began to blossom, Han Cuiying even had the idea of selling her.

If Bai Xiying hadn’t been vigilant, she would have nearly been sold off by her in collusion with outsiders.

Later, Han Cuiying died after a fall, and only then did Bai Xiying’s life gradually get better.

She never found the money Han Cuiying had left behind, but by relying on the help of kind-hearted people and school scholarships, she fought her way through to university.

She had thought a bright and brilliant future was right before her, but fate played a trick on her, leading her to meet the original Lin Xingzhu, and from then on, her world was turned upside down.

She pretended to wipe the corner of her eye. As her mood calmed, she noticed that Lin Xingzhu had used the pronoun “them.”

Setting aside for a moment whether this “them” referred to a man or a woman, how did Lin Xingzhu know her family was only one person? [LP: This is Bai Xiying’s internal thought process. She interprets the ambiguous “them” as possibly referring to a single person, which is a valid reading of the pronoun in this context, even though Lin Xingzhu used it to be vague about number/gender.]

But then Bai Xiying remembered that she had received a related inspirational scholarship in university, so Lin Xingzhu would likely know something about her situation.

She sniffled, looking heartbroken, and with her nose tipped red, she threw herself into Lin Xingzhu’s arms again under her concerned gaze.

Like a fledgling swallow throwing itself into an embrace, utterly dependent.

If, that is, Lin Xingzhu hadn’t felt a pair of lips crashing firmly against her collarbone.

At the same time, a loud Muah! rang out in the air.

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